Snakes!!!

[TheBajan]

I have a truly debilitating fear of snakes. It's way beyond the typical reaction of getting startled and getting over it. To give you an idea of what I mean, I can't see a snake on tv without picking up my feet and curling up tight under a blanket. I was cutting the grass once and came across a snake skin that had been shed (it was just the dead shell of skin) and I froze in a panic, got dizzy and began to hyperventilate. My son had to guide me back to the house.

A few weeks ago I was at a friends house and her daughter ran inside and said she saw a snake in the yard. For the next 45 minutes all I could think about was snakes and when my friend asked me to take her to the store I mentioned I would like her to walk ahead of me to watch for snakes. She laughed and said she had a pet snake to show me. It turned out to be a plastic toy she has in the grass by her front door but I nearly passed out. It took me two hours to get over it. She was really apologetic but I was embarrassed. I can't walk through our yard without the fear that I'm going to see one and when I do, I have nightmares for two or three days. As I type this, my family is outside building a fence and I'm inside because I saw a snake.

We actually moved from Texas to Michigan due in large part to my fear of snakes but it hasn't improved. It doesn't matter if they are dead, alive, poisonous, or just a little grass snake.... they all completely terrify me.

At one point I started forcing myself to watch documentaries on snakes in the hopes that seeing them on TV would help to de-sensitize me to them. I have tried forcing myself to go in the reptile house at the zoo. It hasn't worked. I don't know how to deal with this and it's really becoming a problem. When I'm outside I force myself to not look at the ground b/c I don't want to see them. I even close my eyes completely sometimes. In areas on my yard where I've come across them, I avoid. Unfortunately, that's becoming a larger and larger part of my yard.

The biggest problem is that I really love being in nature. I want to grow a garden and knowing that I will come across grass snakes keeps me from doing it. My daughter in law loves snakes and says that she never sees them. I see five or six every year! I actually come across more snakes here in Michigan than I did in Texas.

I have no idea where this fear came from but it's been with my for as long as I can remember and it's getting worse. I need help. Is there anyone out there who has dealt with this? Any suggestions on how to overcome it. I'm desperate! Please don't tell me to seek professional help.... I'm broke and we don't have insurance. That's why I'm coming to you guys so please help if you can!
Blessings
The Bajan

[GoingDown]

Most snakes are harmless. And around here, the dangerous ones usually let you know that they are near by rattling their tails at you.

Just try to keep in mind that they don't see you as food, and they are just as scared of you as you are of them. They will try to get away from you. And they will try to hide from you. Get rid of their hiding places (tall grass, bushes and shrubs that hang on the ground, holes in the ground, rocky areas with gaps between the rocks, etc.) around your home. Make your place as unwelcome for them as you can, and hopefully, you won't see them in your yard as much as you do now.

[LadyInTheRed]

How awful. Yes, you definitely need to figure out how to deal with this. I have no personal experience with fears other than learning about my friend's fear of heights after getting her on a narrow trail on the side of a mountain! It was too late in the day to turn around and go back the way we came. That was the hardest 1/2 mile of hike I have ever experienced. Of course, it was much harder for her. I did learn that no matter how irrational a fear may seem, trying to tell somebody who suffers from a phobia that there is nothing to be afraid of doesn't help.

I don't know much about getting over fears, but I'm an expert on the Google search.

Rather than forcing yourself to look at snakes on video and in the Zoo, have you tried taking a real interest in learning about snakes? Start with something less graphic like a book with sketches instead of photos. Maybe even a children's book with friendly illustrated snakes. Then, gradually move towards video, but with the goal of learning about snakes rather than forcing yourself to tolerate looking at them.

Here's a review of a book on anxiety that could help: http://nervousillness.wordpress.com/...r-your-nerves/ The site has reviews of other anxiety self help products.

Maybe you'll find something helpful in this site: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/phob..._treatment.htm

How about hypnosis? There is an inexpensive download at http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/fea...s/snake-phobia. http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/hel...er/video/snake

In my google search, I found a lot of sites with photos of pretty mean looking snakes. I didn't include links to those sites.

[TheBajan]

How awful. Yes, you definitely need to figure out how to deal with this. I have no personal experience with fears other than learning about my friend's fear of heights after getting her on a narrow trail on the side of a mountain! It was too late in the day to turn around and go back the way we came. That was the hardest 1/2 mile of hike I have ever experienced. Of course, it was much harder for her. I did learn that no matter how irrational a fear may seem, trying to tell somebody who suffers from a phobia that there is nothing to be afraid of doesn't help.

I don't know much about getting over fears, but I'm an expert on the Google search.

Rather than forcing yourself to look at snakes on video and in the Zoo, have you tried taking a real interest in learning about snakes? Start with something less graphic like a book with sketches instead of photos. Maybe even a children's book with friendly illustrated snakes. Then, gradually move towards video, but with the goal of learning about snakes rather than forcing yourself to tolerate looking at them.

Here's a review of a book on anxiety that could help: http://nervousillness.wordpress.com/...r-your-nerves/ The site has reviews of other anxiety self help products.

Maybe you'll find something helpful in this site: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/phob..._treatment.htm

How about hypnosis? There is an inexpensive download at http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/fea...s/snake-phobia. http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/hel...er/video/snake

In my google search, I found a lot of sites with photos of pretty mean looking snakes. I didn't include links to those sites.

Lady,
Thank you for the suggestions. I haven't ever approached it that way. It's an idea I will look into and I'll look at the links also. Thank you too for the compassion. It's not rational and I know it. I just can't talk myself into being okay.

Most snakes are harmless. And around here, the dangerous ones usually let you know that they are near by rattling their tails at you.

Just try to keep in mind that they don't see you as food, and they are just as scared of you as you are of them. They will try to get away from you. And they will try to hide from you. Get rid of their hiding places (tall grass, bushes and shrubs that hang on the ground, holes in the ground, rocky areas with gaps between the rocks, etc.) around your home. Make your place as unwelcome for them as you can, and hopefully, you won't see them in your yard as much as you do now.

I know all those things in my head but it doesn't matter. Last Thursday I saw a 3 foot snake slithering across our driveway as I walk out of the garage.... it really freaked me out. There's no tall grass there! Thank you though for pointing out the truth, although, I'm not convinced they are as afraid of me as I am of them.

Thanks to you both.

The Bajan

[tobee43]

your story just made me think about my daughter when she was three and walked into our house (we lived way out in the mountains very country setting full of snakes and critters), but she walked in with her yellow beach bucket full of what she said was worms for fishing for her daddy. well, it was an entire bucket full of black snake babies.

i guess that would not have been a very good scene at your house!

i had gotten bit by a rabid dog when i was a child, it was a very large wild german shepard type dog, and, i had to go through the old type of treatment which was a needle through the stomach, suffice to say, as i got older my fear for large dogs increased 20 fold and was just getting worse. so, what i did was went out and out a HUGE dog puppy and raised it and lost my fear along the way.

i would go to pet smart or some type of pet shop (since i'm certain you are not willing to go get one from the yard), and get a garner baby snake and see if maybe you could work with getting to touch and watching it and see if that helps. i know by having a large dog cured me of my fear. many people have snakes for pets and lizards and such. (my daughter has had lizards her entire life and now has some what are referred to as designer ones which she loves , have no clue how one would love a lizard, but she does).

just a suggestion, but having one as a pet in a cage may help you understand their behavior and yours better...maybe??

[LadyInTheRed]

your story just made me think about my daughter when she was three and walked into our house (we lived way out in the mountains very country setting full of snakes and critters), but she walked in with her yellow beach bucket full of what she said was worms for fishing for her daddy. well, it was an entire bucket full of black snake babies.

i guess that would not have been a very good scene at your house!

OMG! That would be a bad scene at my house and I love snakes!

[TheBajan]

your story just made me think about my daughter when she was three and walked into our house (we lived way out in the mountains very country setting full of snakes and critters), but she walked in with her yellow beach bucket full of what she said was worms for fishing for her daddy. well, it was an entire bucket full of black snake babies.

i guess that would not have been a very good scene at your house!

i had gotten bit by a rabid dog when i was a child, it was a very large wild german shepard type dog, and, i had to go through the old type of treatment which was a needle through the stomach, suffice to say, as i got older my fear for large dogs increased 20 fold and was just getting worse. so, what i did was went out and out a HUGE dog puppy and raised it and lost my fear along the way.

i would go to pet smart or some type of pet shop (since i'm certain you are not willing to go get one from the yard), and get a garner baby snake and see if maybe you could work with getting to touch and watching it and see if that helps. i know by having a large dog cured me of my fear. many people have snakes for pets and lizards and such. (my daughter has had lizards her entire life and now has some what are referred to as designer ones which she loves , have no clue how one would love a lizard, but she does).

just a suggestion, but having one as a pet in a cage may help you understand their behavior and yours better...maybe??

That would be grounds for moving out instantly to a hotel or with a relative while my husband sells the house... no way in the world would I be able to go back and live there. It's actually hard for me to even talk about this because I know I will be dreaming about it tonight but I'm hoping that talking about it will be the beginning of coping with it somehow. The idea of getting a pet snake is just unthinkable to me. Throughout my life I've had a re-occurring dream about being bitten by snakes on the neck. It's so real I wake up actually feeling the bite! I went to the links that Lady posted earlier and the most informative discussed steps to take in 'confronting' my fear. I am not nearly there!!! Believe me, I really want to get over this but I can't even imagine being able to get close enough to a snake to purposely touch it. I avoid that area at Petsmart. I'm afraid one of them will accidentally be out of it's cage while a customer is buying one or something like that and I'll end up freaking out in public. I understand what you mean about the dogs though. I love dogs and we have both little dogs (Pomeranians) and big dogs (Rhodesian Ridgebacks). Before I got the Ridgebacks I was nervous around large breeds. Not phobic, just a little unsure. Not anymore. I don't even think about it. So I do understand the thought behind the suggestion. I just can't conceive of being able to make it happen... the idea of it is beyond me.
Thank you though for your thoughtfulness.

[oregonpilot]

Ohhhh Bajan. You & I must be sister spirits. I am petrified of snakes.
When i was little my mom use to ship me off from MN to my gramma's in Michigan. OMG..Pine snakes. not sure if that is really the name. I once walked up to my grammas front door. there was one curled up on the porch right in front of the door. I ran screaming running to the back door looking to see if it was chasing me. I spent the next month there in the house.

The little 8 to 10 " garter snakes i run across here in the yard are 3' long by the time i run in the house asking DH to get it and take it far away. I'm petrified to cut the grass after it gets warm enough for them to come out. I love to garden and it is always in my mind wondering if i am going to see one.
DH has started cutting the lawn now.
I have my "spot in the trail" where i see snakes and avoid those areas of the yard. Only place i can really relax in the yard is up on the deck.
When i wake up screaming and moaning in the middle of the night DH says....snakes again, huh???
Can not watch any show with snakes...no way, no how!!

The bucket of snakes would have unglued me. Lived in San Diego for a few yrs. Saw Rattle snake in back yard right after we moved there. Called hub at work and he had to come home. never did go outside by the pool after that without trepidation or taking my eyes off the ground.

I can sure relate....this is probably not helping you. But only for you to know you are not alone.
Good luck to you. I have decided that this is one phobia with me till i die.

[TheBajan]

Ohhhh Bajan. You & I must be sister spirits. I am petrified of snakes.
When i was little my mom use to ship me off from MN to my gramma's in Michigan. OMG..Pine snakes. not sure if that is really the name. I once walked up to my grammas front door. there was one curled up on the porch right in front of the door. I ran screaming running to the back door looking to see if it was chasing me. I spent the next month there in the house.

The little 8 to 10 " garter snakes i run across here in the yard are 3' long by the time i run in the house asking DH to get it and take it far away. I'm petrified to cut the grass after it gets warm enough for them to come out. I love to garden and it is always in my mind wondering if i am going to see one.
DH has started cutting the lawn now.
I have my "spot in the trail" where i see snakes and avoid those areas of the yard. Only place i can really relax in the yard is up on the deck.
When i wake up screaming and moaning in the middle of the night DH says....snakes again, huh???
Can not watch any show with snakes...no way, no how!!

The bucket of snakes would have unglued me. Lived in San Diego for a few yrs. Saw Rattle snake in back yard right after we moved there. Called hub at work and he had to come home. never did go outside by the pool after that without trepidation or taking my eyes off the ground.

I can sure relate....this is probably not helping you. But only for you to know you are not alone.
Good luck to you. I have decided that this is one phobia with me till i die.

Exactly! Thank you for sharing. I've never met anyone who is as scared of snakes as I am and most people don't really understand the extent of my fear. Growing up, my kids always knew that pranks with toy snakes were completely off limits and they made sure their friends knew it also. I hope this is something I can overcome but if touching a snake is the only way to do it then I think it's a lost cause.

[Tater]

((((((((((((((((((((Bajan))))))))))))))) Hugs to you!

I think LIR had some good advice with starting with children's books and working your way up. I have a healthy respect for snakes as I grew up around them. We lived in an area where cotton mouths and rattle snakes were common. Black snakes were always around our house. I would watch my parents chop their heads off with a hoe. YUCK! I have only come across one snake where we live now. I was going out to get the mail bare footed and almost stepped on it. I'm okay with snakes but I have a horrible fear of spiders. Maybe I need to take LIR's advice when it comes to spiders. Maybe we could start our own support group?

[BKOnce]

By hypnotism (deep trance inductive session).. psychiatrist/hypnotist person can bring OUT the INNER FEAR in you, and make it go away. Similarly, any type of fear (i.e., deep pit, height, water, air travel, animal, etc..) can also be brought out to analyze the CAUSE for you to see WHY you fear it at the first place (often they are stored in the last life's deep memory/impressions, or last life's horror experiences, past/recent accidents/traumas, lately shocks events, etc..). Once you understand the reason of your inner FEAR, it will gradually disappear altogether!

[MSbklawyer]

Any suggestions on how to overcome it.

A handgun-style weapon that shoots shotgun shells.

I am beyond being scared of snakes, I hate snakes. I kill every snake I see.

Or you could move to Ireland. No snakes in Ireland.

[TheBajan]

no snakes in Barbados either (that's where I'm from originally). maybe that's why I'm so scared of them??? moving back to Barbados when we retire is definitely on my wish list!!

[dina13]

I've read about phobias like this, and one way to explain it is that you might have been killed by a snake in one of your previous lives (if you believe there are past lives). A fear like this could be resolved if you do a past life regression, and remember exactly what has caused it, and make peace with it.
I personally don't have experience with past life regressions, however a friend of mine has done it a while ago, and it helped her deal with her issues.

[GoingDown]

A handgun-style weapon that shoots shotgun shells.

I am beyond being scared of snakes, I hate snakes. I kill every snake I see.

Or you could move to Ireland. No snakes in Ireland.

I know people around here who carry an ordinary .22 pistol loaded with snakeshot bullets when they go horseback riding in the desert.