i'm 26 and a recent college grad in the State of Washington. I have always had a full time job, but only 2 months ago got a job that allows me to pay my baisc needs and some extras comfortably, without borrowing from family or taking out pay day loans to survive until the next payday. here's my sad sob backstory, and my few questions at the end.......
2 years ago I got out of a horrible relationship with a guy who manipulated me and tore me apart for over 5 years. I was young, dumb, and naive, and unwilling to listen to family at the time, because i thought i was in "Love".
When I finally split from him, I realized the horrible debt I had fallen into while with him. When he wasn't working, i paid for everything with my credit cards (rent, cell, cable, electicity, food, and extras) I thought i was making him happy, but he was only making me miserable. when my limit was reached, i would have it increased, because i was at least making my minimum payments on time every month. whenever I would mention how broke we were, and how we needed to pay down the debt, he would always tell me things would be fine, and to just use my credit card until we could be more "comfortable living". It wasn't until I left him and I was living alone and surviving on only my income, I relaized that I couldn't even afford minimum paymetns on the accounts I had. I realized that while with him, my credit card debt had racked up to $28000 (not including student loans of mine), all in MY name, and he had no credit cards or anything in his name at all. He got all the benefits of the money (new tv, dvd racks, book cases, bed, stereos, vdieo games systems and accessories, computer, home furnishings) and I got all the debt. I'm not a material kind of person, so when I left, i took what was mine and what was necessary (clothes, my laptop, and my cat). I had to rebuild my life from scratch, but eventually I had to stop paying on all of the debt, because I just couldn't afford it. and none of the creditors were willing to work with me on lowering my payments so that I could actually pay them off. I soon found myself dropping from a credit score of 710 to close to 500 in just a few short months. I wanted to cry, as I worked so hard to keep up on things so that I could enjoy things later on, such as owning my own home. my name is on ALL of the debt, minus a $15000 line of credit I had with my bank. it was to be in MY NAME only, but somehow, his name was attached to the account and it was not discovered for a year his name was on it. we tried for months, even before the split, to remove his name, and the creditor would not remove it. needless to say, i don't pay on it now, and i know it's probably effecting his credit too.
on top of the credit debt, I also purchased a car 10 months before we split, and his name is on the car as co-signer. It is not the car I wanted, but he convinced me to trade in my fully paid off Explorer for something more economical, so i purchased a brand new 2007 Hyundai Accent. I make all the payments for the car. Shortly after I got it, he was driving it and damaged the front bumper by sliding into a snow bank in the winter. we got barely anything from the insurance (deductible) and turned around and paid the car payment with the amount we got from insurance because we didn't have any money. after we split, he wasn't giving me my mail, so my insurance expired without my knowledge, and low and behold I was hit by a hit and run driver which badly damaged my back bumper. for being only 3 years old, the inside is great and the engine is well taken care of, but the exterior is damaged on both bumpers.
I want to file bankruptcy and start over. I already have over $40000 in student debt that i know i can't get rid of and am more than willing to pay for it. with just my normal bills and my student loan payments (which become due in october this year), I really have no extra income. I pay rent, utilities, my car and food. I don't have cable, i have the smallest cell phone plan (because it's cheaper than a home phone), and i don't go out with friends or go to movies. becuase I was screwed over by my best friend on rent for an apartment, I no longer will live with a roommate, as I just can't trust anyone to come through on their own payments. and paying rent on my own is not cheap in the area I live. I already work over an hour away from where I live, because where I work is even MORE expensive for renting. i hardly pay for Gas for the car, because my new employer provides a free bus pass, so I use that to get around lately.
The questions:
Is it wise to file for bankruptcy, or should I try and pay off 1 creditor at a time until it's all gone (which could take a few years)?
can I even include the largest account I have ($15000) that has my ex's name on it? I have absolutely no contact with him, not in 2 years, and have no idea how to even get ahold of him.
do i really have any other options?
I really want to own my own home one day. and I've finally found a guy who treats me well that I want to start a family with, but with the economy the way it is, even he is struggling to keep work these days. i don't want my OWN financial problems to hinder any future we may have together.
any suggestions? anyone in washington state know more about bankruptcy rules and laws? any advice at all would be greatly appreciated. I just don't know anyone who's ever gone through this, so I figured a bankruptcy forum would be my best place to start.
thanx,
Holly
2 years ago I got out of a horrible relationship with a guy who manipulated me and tore me apart for over 5 years. I was young, dumb, and naive, and unwilling to listen to family at the time, because i thought i was in "Love".
When I finally split from him, I realized the horrible debt I had fallen into while with him. When he wasn't working, i paid for everything with my credit cards (rent, cell, cable, electicity, food, and extras) I thought i was making him happy, but he was only making me miserable. when my limit was reached, i would have it increased, because i was at least making my minimum payments on time every month. whenever I would mention how broke we were, and how we needed to pay down the debt, he would always tell me things would be fine, and to just use my credit card until we could be more "comfortable living". It wasn't until I left him and I was living alone and surviving on only my income, I relaized that I couldn't even afford minimum paymetns on the accounts I had. I realized that while with him, my credit card debt had racked up to $28000 (not including student loans of mine), all in MY name, and he had no credit cards or anything in his name at all. He got all the benefits of the money (new tv, dvd racks, book cases, bed, stereos, vdieo games systems and accessories, computer, home furnishings) and I got all the debt. I'm not a material kind of person, so when I left, i took what was mine and what was necessary (clothes, my laptop, and my cat). I had to rebuild my life from scratch, but eventually I had to stop paying on all of the debt, because I just couldn't afford it. and none of the creditors were willing to work with me on lowering my payments so that I could actually pay them off. I soon found myself dropping from a credit score of 710 to close to 500 in just a few short months. I wanted to cry, as I worked so hard to keep up on things so that I could enjoy things later on, such as owning my own home. my name is on ALL of the debt, minus a $15000 line of credit I had with my bank. it was to be in MY NAME only, but somehow, his name was attached to the account and it was not discovered for a year his name was on it. we tried for months, even before the split, to remove his name, and the creditor would not remove it. needless to say, i don't pay on it now, and i know it's probably effecting his credit too.
on top of the credit debt, I also purchased a car 10 months before we split, and his name is on the car as co-signer. It is not the car I wanted, but he convinced me to trade in my fully paid off Explorer for something more economical, so i purchased a brand new 2007 Hyundai Accent. I make all the payments for the car. Shortly after I got it, he was driving it and damaged the front bumper by sliding into a snow bank in the winter. we got barely anything from the insurance (deductible) and turned around and paid the car payment with the amount we got from insurance because we didn't have any money. after we split, he wasn't giving me my mail, so my insurance expired without my knowledge, and low and behold I was hit by a hit and run driver which badly damaged my back bumper. for being only 3 years old, the inside is great and the engine is well taken care of, but the exterior is damaged on both bumpers.
I want to file bankruptcy and start over. I already have over $40000 in student debt that i know i can't get rid of and am more than willing to pay for it. with just my normal bills and my student loan payments (which become due in october this year), I really have no extra income. I pay rent, utilities, my car and food. I don't have cable, i have the smallest cell phone plan (because it's cheaper than a home phone), and i don't go out with friends or go to movies. becuase I was screwed over by my best friend on rent for an apartment, I no longer will live with a roommate, as I just can't trust anyone to come through on their own payments. and paying rent on my own is not cheap in the area I live. I already work over an hour away from where I live, because where I work is even MORE expensive for renting. i hardly pay for Gas for the car, because my new employer provides a free bus pass, so I use that to get around lately.
The questions:
Is it wise to file for bankruptcy, or should I try and pay off 1 creditor at a time until it's all gone (which could take a few years)?
can I even include the largest account I have ($15000) that has my ex's name on it? I have absolutely no contact with him, not in 2 years, and have no idea how to even get ahold of him.
do i really have any other options?
I really want to own my own home one day. and I've finally found a guy who treats me well that I want to start a family with, but with the economy the way it is, even he is struggling to keep work these days. i don't want my OWN financial problems to hinder any future we may have together.
any suggestions? anyone in washington state know more about bankruptcy rules and laws? any advice at all would be greatly appreciated. I just don't know anyone who's ever gone through this, so I figured a bankruptcy forum would be my best place to start.
thanx,
Holly
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