Girlfriend is gone, so is most the income....

[indebtbad]

First of all, thank you so much to all the helpful people on this forum. I have a questions regarding a fairly unique situation.
Here we go:


I have been involved with a young lady who worked as an exotic dancer/escort for the past few years. She hasn't filed taxes in over 4 years and we basically used her income and my credit for everything the past two and a half years. I work but my bring home is only around $1700 per month.

I am in debt to the tune of around $40,000 dollars in unsecured credit card debt that we both racked up and I no longer have a girlfriend or her income around. I basically got an "I just can't do this anymore" letter and a changed phone number. No forwarding address no nothing. A friend says she is headed to either Vegas or Florida to chase the big money. I'm pretty sure I got left for a sugar daddy of some sort.

That's the back story. I own a home I bought 10 years ago (when i had a much better job and no felony) I can afford the payment with my room mate chipping in but am thinking about giving it up in a BKK to go stay with a friend in another state as this one has been nothing but misery the past few years.

I honestly have no idea how I am going to come up with an extra 1000 a month to pay on these cards. I have looked everywhere for a part time job, but it seems even the most "bottom of the barrel" jobs won't hire me with a felony. There is much more to the story than this (I will elaborate if need be) but thats the personal side of things.

Sorry to be long winded but how is the BKK courts going to look at $4k a month of cash being ran through my bank the past few years when my paystubs only reflect $1700 a month? I am current on everything but won't be after this month. I haven't made a charge in 5 months and that was a few hundred dollars. Under my last six months stubs I qualify for a chapter 7 easily way under the median, but how do I explain the additional monies in the bank? I also don't want to get my ex in any trouble.

I don't have even close the amount of money to pay on the credit cards. My car payment is under 200 every month and will be paid off in about 18 months


It seems after reading this forum that I should just stop paying for six months and walk away from everything? I do have some nice furniture, nice TV and a computer. I would say wholesale amounts on everything are around $3k.

I hope that isn't too much info and would appreciate any advice.

[Floridagail]

The trustee is most likely not going to look at your bank account for past years. He is only interested in last 6 mos b4 you file.

If you cannot pay the cc, you can not pay. Filing bankruptcy would discharge the debts you owe. Your possessions are figured at fleamarket value 300.00 value not what you paid. If you decide to walk away stop paying and save your money for attorney.
I only had to provide the last 2 months bank statements and my last 2 income tax filings to trustee. If you are not being sued, I would wait to file bkrptcy and see if anyone comes after you. I stopped paying my cc for 18mos before anyone sued me. My son never got sued. If you cannot afford your home and have to walk away, then stay there and stop paying and save your money.

[keepmine]

If the trustee does ask for bank statements from over a year or more-just tell the truth.
Your ex furnished most of the income. You won't be the first to get in financial trouble due to divorce, separation or death of a spouse or SO.
I'd also agree with the previous poster. Take your time and plan this thing out. File when it'll do you the most good.
If you have equity in that house you bought and it can be exempted in your bk then, don't give it up. File, get discharged and sell it post bk.
Or, sell it now and use the proceeds to support yourself as you relocate.
If there is equity, don't just give it away.

[indebtbad]

Thanks for the replies everyone. So basically just wait it out until the last minute to file and I should be ok? I'd like to get it over with soon and move on with my life, but it seems like waiting six months or more would be my best options. I wonder how long I can stay in my home if I stop payments on it? There really isn't any equity to speak of since I never have been able to get refinanced. I am basically at the break even point with it now. It may be worth around 1k over what I owe. I don't know if it would be worth it to try and sell before the bkk. Hmm.

Also if I'm reading it correctly it seems as if I can keep 8k of my personal property in Indiana? I don't have 8k worth of things at wholesale I am sure. I plan to reaffirm my car loan (It is worth about 8k and I owe $7600) it's a great car very dependable. I guess the only question is if I want to keep the house.

[Floridagail]

We plan to stay in our home forever until they kick us out. It could be a year or 3 . All states are different. But you have a chance to save money and wait until at least it goes to sale. My attorney said no reason to try to sell for the bank. It only helps the realtor get paid. We are going on 4mos and still no word except calls on our phone. My stepson moved to Ga july 2007 and stopped paying his house in Florida , it still has not been taken over by the bank.
So it could be a long time.

[tcreegan]

Hi indebtbad,

I wonder how long I can stay in my home if I stop payments on it? The lender will wait until you are months behind, then they begin to foreclose which takes months and if you file BK that will add more months. And if the market is in the toilet where you are, it may be a couple years or more till they foreclose

You have to squeeze your car in with your personal property, so make sure your value on the car accounts for age, condition, and is not the highest value in the Kelly Blue Book...

Tom in Colo

ps: I also don't want to get my ex in any trouble. ...you said she moved, left no forwarding address, no phone, she didn't pay taxes, and the credit paper trail is in your name...how on earth is she going to get in trouble?!!

[indebtbad]

I can't just keep paying on the car, reaffirm the loan and then still have the personal property exemption? I have no problem paying off the rest of the car loan as I can afford it and it's a good car.

[Floridagail]

Your car value counts in your exemption too. ( what it is value minus what you owe= amount added to your exemption) If upside down then no exemption needed. You can keep paying your car without reaffirming also. keep it current. It will be discharged and as long as you keep paying you are fine. ( If you were to lose your job or get sick and could not pay after reaffirming, then the could sue you again so why take risk).

[mrskal]

It does not look like you have much equity in your car, you will only need to exempt the equity. From what you posted you will use $400 of the exemption for the car. The rest would be for all of your other stuff.

[indebtbad]

Thanks mrskal, yeah it looks like I might even be upside down if we are talking trade in value rather than resale value. I think I'm going to be just fine. It's going to be nice to get a fresh start in alot of ways. Thanks for the help everyone.

[indebtbad]

Oh, one more thing, I work as a bouncer at a club, it pays roughly $100 a night for four nights a week (I get tips from bar staff and make minimum wage) so I am only working 24 hours a week. There really isn't more opportunity for more hours at my current job, but I can't for the life of me find anything else. Even fast food jobs have turned me down flat. Is the trustee going to assume I am a lazy bumb because I am not working 40 + hours a week? Again, I have tried jobs at the dock, pretty much everything. I'm also limited to not being able to drive due to a suspended license. My life is so screwed up =( I suppose I could maybe try to find some under the table work, but that still wouldn't reflect on my hourly wages to the trustee. Society isn't very kind to those that have served time and are trying to fly straight.

[FishersMike]

Many jobs do not run background checks. Are you just being honest with them? If you cannot get fast food job maybe try answering "No" to convictions. Worst case if they find out you will lose a job you would not have had in the first place. I hope things get better, especially you being a fellow Hoosier.

[indebtbad]

Yes Mike on the applications I am answering the questions honestly. They all say "Have you ever been convicted of a felony" I thought it was a federal crime to lie about it? Also keep in mind that I don't have a drivers license and won't for a few more months so I am limited to the South west side. Not many jobs near where I live.

If you could give advice on jobs that don't run background checks outside of bars then I would be greatful. Look at craigslist or any other postings for manual labor and stuff. Every one of them does a background check.

[FishersMike]

See all jobs will SAY they are doing a background check, but most jobs at companies that are not office jobs do not. It is not a Federal or State crime to lie on an application about it. The only thing that can happen if they find out later is grounds for termination. Most fast food establishments would not run one. However most gas stations would as they deal with more liability with cigarettes, alcohol, and more cash.

Also depending on how long ago it happened, it may not be a huge issue. If it was over 7 years ago then background checks ran through third party vendors is protected under the Fair Credit Reporting Act and they cannot show activity over 7 years. The exception to this rule is if an employer does a DIRECT background check, but this is rare.

I will try to ask around people for job openings on your side of town. I live in Fishers obviously and work also on Northside so I do not know of places specifically, just generally.

[indebtbad]

Wow man, that is awesome! Thanks so much. Glad to know those things!