Marital bliss

[uncrunner]

Hello,

I am so glad I found this forum. It has helped turn sleepless nights into HOPE that there may be solutions out there!

My wife and I are getting separated. We owe $29,000 in credit cards and a home that is underwater by $30,000 minimum. Per her Separation Proposal, she wants to split the credit cards and leave me with the house. I am in the Real Estate industry and have seem my income drop by 65% in the last two years so there is no way I can afford my mortgage, car, and $14,500 in cc bills alone so Chap 7 is a viable option. Problem is she doesn't want to file joint with me because she could lose some land her family deeded to her 6 months ago with a lot of sentimental value. My fear too is that if she agrees to file joint she will try to nail me to the cross on child support and alimony.

So:

1.) What about agreeing to separate per the terms above, then stop paying on my mortgage and filing a Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure OR a Short Sale after separation? Will I be responsible for the loss in FC? Will she be responsbile at all for my failure to pay or for me filing D ILO Foreclosure?

2.) What if I stop paying on my car and allow it to get repoed to help pay off the $15,000 in cards (going to negotiate down the balance with the cc company) and, if so, will they go after my ex wife for anything?

Or: Is it just better to file a Chapter 7 and take my chances with her renegotiating child support or alimony?

Thanks

[newbie2]

File a chapter 7 and be done with it. It sounds like you'll only be prolonging the inevitable.

Child support is a different issue entirely, I wouldn't be worried about that right now. (In most states it is based upon a percentage of your earnings. You aren't earning much, and I'm sure you don't have an issue with helping to support your child.)

[forgotten]

1) It depends on if you can get the bank to accept a short sale of DIL as full satisfaction of the note. A lot of times you need to sign a promisory note for the deficiency, in which case you would still owe the difference.

2) The bank will sell the car at auction and send you a bill for the difference between what they sold it for and what you owed on it.

Are the credit cards in just your name or both your names? Her obligation to pay will remain on any card she cosigned for, if your divorce "agreement" requires you to pay any cards in her name, then you will still owe them.

[uncrunner]

Wow thanks! My bluebook value on the car is about $9,000 and I owe $14,000 on it. All but $5,000 is in her name but I have used the cards as well. Sounds like I could get in much deeper trouble by going DIL and car repo than just doing a Ch 7 and taking my chances. Thanks.

[DebtEnder]

Couple things to be wary of.

1. In what state do you live. If it's a community property state then any debt you fail on from BK or just not paying they can come after here in force, even if she never signed anything unless the debt was incurred before marriage.

2. If you file BK and the house/car has both your names on the note she can be held responsible for the debt. Depending on how you have the divorce agrements worded she could then sue you for not paying the house. You can't Bk on domestic payments and if so worded you paying the house could be considered that. IE the bank could not sue you, but they could sue her, and then she could sue you.

Now if you file before you divorce then I have no idea how that might work. But something I would be looking into.

[uncrunner]

Yep it is a Community Property State and she could get the Domestic Judge to come back over the BK via our sep agreement and get me to pay more in child support, alimony, or just be required to pay something. I think they can?

[OhioFiler]

You need a slick attorney.

[LSUTiger32]

Title of thread: Marital bliss
Body of thread: Getting separated

[uncrunner]

You know what the number one cause of divorce in America is?............................................... .................................................. .Marriage.

[ForumReader]

You know what the number one cause of divorce in America is?............................................... .................................................. .Marriage.

hey that would be a good topic to discuss about over in the general talk forum

Aside from that, get some free bk consultations before filing for divorce and see what these attorneys advise you to do so. Best wishes.

[chassm]

Your situation is tough, looks like the two of you are already fighting about the debts and she obviously wants less to do with it. Does she not work or have a way to support herself?

Child support you will pay for either way. Alimony, that depends on the law in your state, in California is you've been married over 10 years you're screwed. Less than 10 you have a much better chance of getting away with not paying any.