Chapter 13 vs adoption/fertility

[debthlp]

HELP! we have not filed yet.. Our hours are being cut at work and we are still trying to pay for credit card and medical bills.. We believe our house is worth less then what we could sell it for...We were thinking about filing chapter 13... and once the 401k loans were paid off we could use it for fertility or adoption.... it is going to free up alot of money once they are done.. we have been trying to just hang in there.. but work is really cutting back... We just after reading some threads realized that once these loans are paid off its not extra $ back in our pockets! Can one of us file and not the other?? how does that work in a household??? Am i responsible for the debt since we are married??? We considered one of us to file and not the other so in a couple of years we can start a family.. I dont think i can wait 5 more years to start the process of having a family, we have been trying for 10 years. Any input would help out! We only have one more year for our big loan but with all the cuts we are barely making ends meet and feel its going to get worse before that year is up.. I know both filing and waiting the 5 years would be the best and responsible option.. but that means 6-7 years of starting a family and its already an extreme emotional burden! Thanks for any advice!

[Over our heads]

Can you file 7? I don't know if a 401k repayment will count as an expense? Would your mortgage payment allow you to qualify for a 7? I simply wouldn't re-affirm them. Get rid of the debt, then get on with your family. Since financials are a big part of an adoption, I'm not sure you would be able to proceed while in an active 13. You might just want to call a few agencies and ask.

And while I'm sure you have heard this before, but you could always foster adopt. I have a friend who only would accept a ward of the state and therefore already free for adoption. Her sweet son just turned 2!

I am a very happy adoptive mommy myself

[momofthree]

You probably will not be permitted to keep the additional money when the 401k is paid off. I have to ditto the above suggestion though. My little brother and sister were adopted thru the foster care system, and not only is it free, but they will also pay you an adoption allowance each month (non-taxable!) until the child is 18. My parents receive around $1000 a month for the twins and it has allowed them to send them to private school and enroll them in all kinds of extra curricular activities, as well as provide a loving home to kids who didn't have parents. They were even able to adopt when they were infants!

[debthlp]

Thanks for the info. We don't quailify for chapter 7. I know adoption is so expensive.. I didn't understand how people afford it. It is something to look into. I wonder if down the road if you could foster. Can they reconfigure your payment plan? We need to figure the best plan if we choose chapter 13. I have already lost a pregnancy with multiple failed attempts so fostering would be a challenge. Another option was only having one of us file but I don't know if we can or how it works. Thanks for the advice it it something to look into that we didn't know about.