Want to have a 2nd child, but scared...

[Footprints1973]

My DH and I will (hopefully) be discharged from our ch 7 bk soon. It's just a matter of working out car payments with the trustee... We will be so grateful when this is all over.

Currently, we have one daughter, age 3. We were in debt before she was born and it got worse after she was born...we are not blaming her though...it's just the way it happens.

We do not want to end up in a debt nightmare again. However, we don't want to close the door on the possibility of having a 2nd child. What can we do to make it work? My husband wants to wait one year before trying to have another child. Right now we are both working, my income is about $27,000/ year, his is 35,000/year. Daycare right now is $115 per week for our 3 yr old daughter.

If I have a child born 2 years from now, I know I would be paying close to $280 a week or more for daycare for an infant (I paid over $250 a week with my daughter when she was an infant). My daughter would be in kindergaten (public), but after school care is around $75-100 week in my area. That's if I chose to work outside the home, during the day...

Is it really that much more expensive to have 2 kids rather than 1? I really want to make this work. I am 35 years old right now, so while I have a few years of fertility left, I don't want wait too long, due to increased risks of medical problems to the baby.

Thanks,
Footprints1973

[ansky0007]

My DH and I will (hopefully) be discharged from our ch 7 bk soon. It's just a matter of working out car payments with the trustee... We will be so grateful when this is all over.

Currently, we have one daughter, age 3. We were in debt before she was born and it got worse after she was born...we are not blaming her though...it's just the way it happens.

We do not want to end up in a debt nightmare again. However, we don't want to close the door on the possibility of having a 2nd child. What can we do to make it work? My husband wants to wait one year before trying to have another child. Right now we are both working, my income is about $27,000/ year, his is 35,000/year. Daycare right now is $115 per week for our 3 yr old daughter.

If I have a child born 2 years from now, I know I would be paying close to $280 a week or more for daycare for an infant (I paid over $250 a week with my daughter when she was an infant). My daughter would be in kindergaten (public), but after school care is around $75-100 week in my area. That's if I chose to work outside the home, during the day...

Is it really that much more expensive to have 2 kids rather than 1? I really want to make this work. I am 35 years old right now, so while I have a few years of fertility left, I don't want wait too long, due to increased risks of medical problems to the baby.

Thanks,
Footprints1973

There is plenty of help available to you through the government if you need it. I am filing next month and my wife is pregnant and I cant put a price on a child. I would anyday give up everything I own for any of my kids or my future child. I say go for it since you you are right about your fertilty clock and it will be a positive at the end of the BK.

[Flamingo]

No one can make personal decisions for someone else. When it comes to something like family size or other personal family matters, you can get all sorts of variances and opinions and the only thing that will work is your own decision cause no one knows your life and your family better than yourself. No one can predict what will occur within the next year or two. Yes, children are expensive and in this economy no one's job is safe. But who knows - one of you could get a job paying a bundle in the next few years - no one knows. Decisions after BK are hard because you are afraid that something like what you just went through can occur again; it can, but utilize the lessons you learned from going through it to prevent letting your money control you.

[filingin08]

My husband and I are talking about a second baby too. Our first (together) is almost 14 months old. I'm 41. It's now or never for us. We're fresh into a 13 - only made one full payment to the trustee and our 341 is next week. We're crazy insane. We each have other children from previous relationships so it's not like this is our only... but... the other kids are all older or are not living with us. This tiny tot will grow up alone. So we've left the decision in God's hands, don't take temps or count days (not yet anyway!). If we do end up with another bundle of joy, we have some ideas how to pay for him/her. The biggest cost is daycare... around here, home daycares are much less than centers. And while I love the center my daughter is at now, I would do home daycare to have another little one. We've already budgeted diapers and formula, so that's a wash. Clothes are a plenty at resale and consignment shops. And we've got all the basics... car seat, stroller, high chair... no cost there.

Good luck to you on your journey. For us, we never, never want to be in cc debt again and we've built a budget that will keep us out of it.

[BKParalegal]

You can always choose to adopt, as well. I had a friend whose husband wanted to adopt an 18 yr old Korean girl, but his wife said no.

Good Luck