Do I file for Bankruptcy now? HELP PLEASE

[merime]

I have run out of money to pay towards my credit card debt. The only property I own is a mortgage on a $175,000 house, which has my husbands name on it too. I have had no luck finding a job yet. Should I just declare bankruptcy and move on? Should I take my name off the deed to the house and divorce my husband? I should add that has has abused me mentally and physically for 16 years. I want out of the marriage anyway. Thank You!!

[AngelinaCat]

Do NOT do anything with the deed if you are planning on filing BK. You need to sit down and plan. You will have a period of perhaps several months of not paying the credit cards. Save that money toward a BK lawyer. As to the husband situation, you will need to decide which is more important first, a divorce or BK.

Many other members have divorced before, during, and after filing bankruptcy, so search around on some of the other threads for their stories.

Whatever you do, please don't do anything in 'panic mode'. Good luck and wishes to you.

[crashzx]

What Kat said +100......I will add some more.....I am so sorry for your relationship situation. It is none to be in. Turn to God with your "whole heart" and he will help you through it. Good luck, If you need any advise on BK you are at the right place. Lots of great info here.

[BigJohn]

I have run out of money to pay towards my credit card debt. The only property I own is a mortgage on a $175,000 house, which has my husbands name on it too. I have had no luck finding a job yet. Should I just declare bankruptcy and move on? Should I take my name off the deed to the house and divorce my husband? I should add that has has abused me mentally and physically for 16 years. I want out of the marriage anyway. Thank You!!

What State are you in?

How much credit card debt do you have? Does this include your husband's credit cards aso?

Do you own cars? Making payments? How long have you had them?


Are you collecting unemployment?

[merime]

Not collecting unemployment, was a stay at home mom. I do have an AA degree. No my husband has no debt because he has all the money. That is how I got into debt. He only gave me $50.00 to feed and care for 3 children. No I do not own a car. Thank you for the advice!!

[frogger]

Very good advice from bigboy.

Slow down, get your head on straight, and think/plan this out. Best of luck to you.

[merime]

Thank you, I agree. It all just feels so hopeless

[hereforinfo]

I'm sorry for your situation. It's not hopeless, even though I'm sure it feels that way. I wouldn't worry about the debt right now, there's not much they can do to you since you aren't employed. Do you have family you could stay with? I think the first thing you need to do is get yourself and your children in a safe environment. Check for support groups, a church, or any kind of organization in your area that provides help and resources for abused women. They can also help you find an attorney to help you get financial support from your husband and figure out a plan for the rest.

[hereforinfo]

Wait, I'm confused. The other post you have going right now is about your boyfriend and a bike you bought for him, where you state you have no property, etc. Now you are married and have a house in your name?

[forgotten]

Wait, I'm confused. The other post you have going right now is about your boyfriend and a bike you bought for him, where you state you have no property, etc. Now you are married and have a house in your name?

Allow me to recap:
mom in debt - i am power of attorney (8/27)
no assets, income, or property (8/27)
no income, property, or vehicle (9/2)
abusive husband (9/3)
on deed of house (9/3)
con-man boyfriend took her for $6k+ (9/9)
owns $175k home (9/24)

[backtoschool]

Thank you, I agree. It all just feels so hopeless

We are here for you. Your safety and peace of mind comes first. I totally agree with Bigboy. You have nothing that a creditor can take right away and it is important that you have a safe supportive place to begin your journey to your fresh start.

Please ignore any users on this board who are grilling you, judging you or challenging you, or asking you to explain yourself too much. Most of us are here to help you get through this.

Going to talk to an attorney will help you feel like you are taking positive steps to build a safe and stable future. Don't do anything with your property until you talk to an attorney because transferring things close to filing bankruptcy will cause complications.

Let us know how your consultations with attorneys are going. Please come back often to tell us how things are working out so far.

[merime]

Yes, I have a husband in name only. He has never been there for me physically or emotionally. He has all the money. My name is on the deed, but it is not paid by me. Because he has so much money , I was able to get credit. Lots of it. Which I paid with the allowance he gave me. Then all the money ran out. My so called friend now has lost his job and cant even help pay towards the bike. Yes, I know how stupid I am and yes I have made unbelievable mistakes. If I could just run away I would, its all too much to bear. I just sit and cry , unable to move paralyzed by fear, shame and regret.

[backtoschool]

Yes, I have a husband in name only. He has never been there for me physically or emotionally. He has all the money. My name is on the deed, but it is not paid by me. Because he has so much money , I was able to get credit. Lots of it. Which I paid with the allowance he gave me. Then all the money ran out. My so called friend now has lost his job and cant even help pay towards the bike. Yes, I know how stupid I am and yes I have made unbelievable mistakes. If I could just run away I would, its all too much to bear. I just sit and cry , unable to move paralyzed by fear, shame and regret.

Please don't beat yourself up. We ALL make mistakes. You don't have to apologize or blame yourself for your mistakes and you do not owe ANYONE on this board an explanation.

You are taking positive action by coming to this board for help. Please just ignore any judgmental posts. Most of us want to help.

[HakunaMatata]

Merime-

As BTS mentioned, you're taking positive action. Addressing your financial predicament is only a fragment of all you're presently enduring; although, this may fall into the "what comes first, the chicken or the egg?" category. Understandably, the money issue can be readily resolved. You understand your options -they're systematic and predictable on many levels...unlike your relationship. As previously stated, your abusive relationship needs to be addressed as well. I truly hope the exploration of your financial issues spurs new confidence, hope, and motivation granting you the ability to overcome the personal challenges you face.

There are numerous resources available to you to aid in conquering your current challenges. Harness your desire for a "fresh start", suspend your feelings of shame, guilt, and regret, and free yourself from fear. We've all made mistakes. Mistakes offer us opportunities for growth.

[merime]

I know , but I don't know where or how to begin. Too many mistakes, too much to deal with. It really is hopeless. Feel like crawling in a hole. Can't find a job , which i need so desperately.