How do you keep your chin up when going through all this???

[Resigned2BK]

Ugh. Sometimes I kind of envy druggies because they can solve the majority of their problems by going to rehab for a month. Where's the rehab for debt carriers?

I registered for this forum a few months back and we still haven't filed yet. We've been working on HAMP. We don't think we'll be approved, but you have to roll deficiencies into BK when you file, not magically later and we're pretty much an automatic Ch7 on account of ridiculously low income. The uncertainty and never ending limbo just drains the life out of me every day. And it's not like you can afford talk therapy when you're broke. Ha.

How do others cope or how did you cope? It is nice and reassuring to see the siggies where people have been discharged, to know there will be an end to this someday.

[OhioFiler]

Ugh. Sometimes I kind of envy druggies because they can solve the majority of their problems by going to rehab for a month. Where's the rehab for debt carriers?

I registered for this forum a few months back and we still haven't filed yet. We've been working on HAMP. We don't think we'll be approved, but you have to roll deficiencies into BK when you file, not magically later and we're pretty much an automatic Ch7 on account of ridiculously low income. The uncertainty and never ending limbo just drains the life out of me every day. And it's not like you can afford talk therapy when you're broke. Ha.

How do others cope or how did you cope? It is nice and reassuring to see the siggies where people have been discharged, to know there will be an end to this someday.

You are not in limbo nor should you think uncertain. Your sense of uncertainty and limbo ended when you chose to pursue bankruptcy. You are in the process of achieving your goal of discharging your debt. Patience and perseverance will serve you well.

Counseling for low income wage earners is readily available.

[ValleYum]

You keep your chin *up* sugar because when you let it drag on the ground, it leaves scars!

Bankruptcy is a business decision that you had to make for yourself and your family. Some really famous and successful people have filed bankruptcy: Walt Disney, Henry Ford, PT Barnum, Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens), Charles Goodyear, Thomas Jefferson and Ulysses S. Grant!! Yes, US presidents have filed bankruptcy!!

Hang in there - your fresh start will be so worth it! Big hugs to you!

[frogger]

Keep your chin up because life does get better. The ability for us to file bk has been one of the greatest gifts in our lives.

[Resigned2BK]

Didn't know about Presidents that filed BK. Interesting. *sigh*

I didn't mean to make light of addiction issues in case anyone not posting was put off reading that. Just occurred to me that that was probably insensitive to post.

[Peeps]

Chin up: "There's no place to go but up"

Also, my attorney told me to do a BK before pursuing a HAMP. It changes your debt to income ratio and makes it easier to get approved for the HAMP. And the BK can help avoid a deficiency judgment if a home mod goes south and you're left with... well... you know... a mess.

Talk therapy is actually pretty cheap. It's the medication management that gets expensive. But it can be well worth the investment if stress is turning you into a bowl of jello every day. It doesn't have to be a long term commitment, just something that helps "get 'er done" in the interim. Best of luck.

[Resigned2BK]

Also, my attorney told me to do a BK before pursuing a HAMP. It changes your debt to income ratio and makes it easier to get approved for the HAMP. And the BK can help avoid a deficiency judgment if a home mod goes south and you're left with... well... you know... a mess.

How does that happen though (and yes, I know you aren't providing legal advice ;-) )? Our atty told us we'll be on the hook for deficiency if we don't include it in the ch7 and we lose our house after the BK is discharged. The housing/debt counselor told us the same thing 2 weeks before we met with the atty.

[shark66]

How does that happen though (and yes, I know you aren't providing legal advice ;-) )? Our atty told us we'll be on the hook for deficiency if we don't include it in the ch7 and we lose our house after the BK is discharged. The housing/debt counselor told us the same thing 2 weeks before we met with the atty.

Let's downshift for a moment here...

You don't get to choose which debts to include in BK. If you still owe money on your house (hasn't been paid off 100%) that debt will be included in your BK and NO ONE can go after you for deficiency of any kind because the entire debt gets discharged...

That's presuming you don't re-affirm. I wouldn't. Should you re-affirm, the bank can come after you for deficiency if the house ends up in foreclosure.

You will lose the house if you're behind on payments since Ch. 7 doesn't provide any ability to cure arrears. If you were to stay current, no lender in their right mind would even attempt foreclosure. They want their money, not your house. Period.

Most people I've known that attempted HAMP got nowhere. Hopefully you'll be amongst the very few lucky ones that were successful, but plan accordingly just in case you're not...

Good luck.

[yang0837]

I agree with what everyone said above, but one thing that definitely helped me was this forum. I can't even begin to explain the relief I felt to know that there were other people out there, who have gone through this or are going through this...and that I was not alone.

[helpme2010]

I feel everyone's pain on this board. For the last 10 years, it has just kept on getting financially worse and worse for me and my girlfriend. I recently discharged a 7 and I still can't find a job and foreclosure will soon kick me out of my house. I worry how I will be able to rent a new place without a job and after bk. I just keep trying to stay positive and try to do something fun each day or night such as watch some fun tv shows, etc.

[shark66]

I feel everyone's pain on this board. For the last 10 years, it has just kept on getting financially worse and worse for me and my girlfriend.

Not to belittle your personal situation, but you've summed up the suffering of middle-class in this country better than any politician ever could, and in plain English, which is a huge plus in my book...

Good luck.

[bulletproof77]

Seagram's 7 and a whole lot of Xanax helps...That and not giving a damn what anyone else thinks..You just survive

[espo1357]

Chin up: "There's no place to go but up"

Also, my attorney told me to do a BK before pursuing a HAMP. It changes your debt to income ratio and makes it easier to get approved for the HAMP. And the BK can help avoid a deficiency judgment if a home mod goes south and you're left with... well... you know... a mess.

Talk therapy is actually pretty cheap. It's the medication management that gets expensive. But it can be well worth the investment if stress is turning you into a bowl of jello every day. It doesn't have to be a long term commitment, just something that helps "get 'er done" in the interim. Best of luck.

Absolutely true.

I had waited for the HAMP for over a year, and nothing.

but, less than one month after I filed, I was approved for the HAMP.

With that being stated, I think the HAMP is over-rated because my house is still underwater big time. The advantage of the HAMP is the silly good low interest rate AND I don't have to put down 20 percent for a down payment on a new house or pay the closing cost.

I love my home, so it makes sense for me to stay, and being under about 100k isn't too bad.

Good luck!

[Pandora]

Hang in there Resigned - the road getting there can be a bit rough but it does get better.

[moneyblues]

I understand. When I first came to this board, I was on the verge of crazy. I have been so much better since I came here. I try not to be a person in limbo and for a little while I was. This board helped me put my head on straight and see the light at the end of the tunnel. I am so grateful now. My motto is: "Do what you need to do now so you can do what you want to do later." I'm trying to get my money right right now so I can file and I have told myself that this is my decision and I'm not changing.