BK offers a new start, how do I start though...

[beachymama]

I want to leave the state I have lived in for 12+ years - Florida. I want to move someplace where there are sports teams, culture, music, dancing, age and race diversity, universities to continue my education and good schools for my children, and oh yeah, a job for me. My job ends over the summer and I am free to explore until the school year begins and my son starts high school (9th grade) along with my 2nd and 5th graders.

Where is this place? I have always lived in the SE (Georgia & Florida) except a short 6 mos in Seattle, plus I was born in NY but left when I was 12. Now I am 40 and restless I guess.

I am thinking of checking out Atlanta (lived there during HS and college days) and California. I like warm weather and oceans.

I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, but I have worked for the federal government in counseling for 10 years and as an elementary school teacher for 4 years. Not sure if I can get a government security clearance with my bankruptcy.

I get $2100 a month alimony/child support and I have about $15000 saved up to move.

Any suggestions? I will want to rent and not have a big commute away from the kids schools.

[sgirl]

Where does the children's father live, and how would the move impact their ability to see him? Are you allowed to move out of state if he is in the same state? Also, if your moving increases the costs he has to pay to exercise his visitation (like flying instead of driving), your child support may be reduced.

[beachymama]

Hi, this is a good point. In our divorce, he is supposed to see the kids every other weekend, but 6 months after, he moved away and out of state, I did not contest it as he did not regularly see the kids like he was supposed to anyway.

So the kids see him over the summer for 1-2 months and at Christmas. He lives in Atlanta, I live near Ft. Myers. I would allow that to still continue as it has worked out well for the past 5 years. He is 8 hours away via driving and if I did move away to someplace like California, that would be impossible.

The kids are 7-14 and we discussed moving closer to Dad, but they are not very warm and fuzzy on the idea but open to it.

[MSbklawyer]

California is a train wreck. I wouldn't wish it or Detroit on anyone.

Mama, to be perfectly frank with you, a lot of people fall for the fallacy that if they can move somewhere else, they can leave their problems behind. That's rarely the case. Your post says that you want age and racial diversity, warm weather, oceans, universities, sports teams, good schools and a good job. Florida, or places in Florida, have all of that. But as with anything, there are tradeoffs:

Ocean views and really good schools make for pricey real estate -- even if you rent . . .

Being near the ocean brings the danger of hurricanes . . .

Being in California is cool, but there is the danger of earthquakes, mudslides and forest fires -- nevermind the hippies and their legal medical marijuana . . . ;)

If you work in a business that is located in a downtown "business district" area, paricularly in Atlanta, you'll have a nightmare commute. . .

It's a sad fact in our society, but it is a fact none the less, that the higher the percentage of "diversity" in a given area, the higher the crime rate tends to be and the worse the public school system will be . . .

University towns tend to have higher rental rates than non-university towns . . .

Trade offs.

I don't want to discourage you from moving if you're in a really crummy or depressed area. To be sure, some places are much better than others. But one of the best things you can have in any place is close family nearby and an existing network of friends -- something you won't have at first in a totally new place.

[beachymama]

Thank you for the frankness. The grass is greener mentality. I know there is no perfect place. Florida is nice, I have had good living here. I work on a barrier island. I see the Gulf everyday, it is expensive there. I only live 10 miles from my job. The area is not crummy or depressed, the people are just old and cranky. It is a vacation retirement area.

I don't mind staying in Florida, I just don't want a touristy area with a retirement age focus anymore. The schools suffer because the residents don't want their tax money spent on schools and the jobs here are for catering to the wealthier snow birds.

[backtoschool]

I want to leave the state I have lived in for 12+ years - Florida. I want to move someplace where there are sports teams, culture, music, dancing, age and race diversity, universities to continue my education and good schools for my children, and oh yeah, a job for me. My job ends over the summer and I am free to explore until the school year begins and my son starts high school (9th grade) along with my 2nd and 5th graders.

Where is this place? I have always lived in the SE (Georgia & Florida) except a short 6 mos in Seattle, plus I was born in NY but left when I was 12. Now I am 40 and restless I guess.

I am thinking of checking out Atlanta (lived there during HS and college days) and California. I like warm weather and oceans.

I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, but I have worked for the federal government in counseling for 10 years and as an elementary school teacher for 4 years. Not sure if I can get a government security clearance with my bankruptcy.

I get $2100 a month alimony/child support and I have about $15000 saved up to move.

Any suggestions? I will want to rent and not have a big commute away from the kids schools.

I think bankruptcy makes one think of fresh starts in all areas of life. I know this was true with me. I moved from nyc to a university town in the midwest as part of my pre-bankruptcy planning. I am very happy I moved. I am close to my family now, my cost of living is way less than it was in nyc (which is not saying much lol, since nyc is so expensive. ) and I have a less stressful life in general, which was what I was aiming for.

But as MSBklawyer says, there are always tradeoffs to any move. I have a less stressful life in the midwest, but it is also a less exciting life. I miss the diversity and cultural abundance of nyc sometimes too. But all in all, I am very happy I made the move.

If you are used to warm weather and like to live near the water, then there are not that many places for you to consider anyway. South Carolina will be a different vibe than Florida (less retirees). Florida is very inexpensive right now due to the real estate collapse there. I think that just about any other warm place near water will end up costing you more than Florida. I personally like the Miami area. It is culturally diverse and vibarant and real estate has come down quite a bit there.

[blessed]

I'd pick Charleston SC! The weather is great and you're still only 6 hours from Atlanta.

[MSbklawyer]

I personally like the Miami area. It is culturally diverse and vibarant and real estate has come down quite a bit there.

Miami is a lot of fun. Living there though . . . I don't know. I mean, if you don't hablo Espanol you're lost. You may as well be in Havana or Mexico City.

Yeah, Florida has more than its fair share of cranky @$$ old people. Same with South Mississippi. What is it about the over-seventy crowd that they've got to always be in a bad mood? Maybe Hub can chime in here and enlighten us. ;) But they're going to drive 45 in the passing lane; they're going to have a reunion right in the middle of the only grocery store isle that I need to go down; they're going to count out 89 cents in coins out of the bottom of their purse/pockets so they can hand the cashier the exact change. And don't you dare blow your horn or roll your eyes or offer to just give them a dollar so you won't have to wait 20 minutes for them to count the change.

[beachymama]

My Southern Living magazines keep talking about Charleston. I think I might make a trip up there. I have been to Hilton Head a couple of times but never to the big city of Charleston.

I am also going to look at Jacksonville too.

I lived in West Palm Beach for 6 years in Wellington. I just cannot afford it, I have looked but rentals in Wellington are out of my reach for the schools that I want. I would like the opportunity to buy again and don't always want to rent. When I lived there, I was a stay at home mom and did not have to worry about a job.

I would love to work and live in the same neighborhood if that is possible, kinda like the Jupiter/Abacoa type place, a mix of residential and research facilities, university and a baseball stadium!

[Logan]

California is a train wreck. I wouldn't wish it or Detroit on anyone.

Mama, to be perfectly frank with you, a lot of people fall for the fallacy that if they can move somewhere else, they can leave their problems behind. That's rarely the case. Your post says that you want age and racial diversity, warm weather, oceans, universities, sports teams, good schools and a good job. Florida, or places in Florida, have all of that. But as with anything, there are tradeoffs:

Ocean views and really good schools make for pricey real estate -- even if you rent . . .

Being near the ocean brings the danger of hurricanes . . .

Being in California is cool, but there is the danger of earthquakes, mudslides and forest fires -- nevermind the hippies and their legal medical marijuana . . . ;)

If you work in a business that is located in a downtown "business district" area, paricularly in Atlanta, you'll have a nightmare commute. . .

It's a sad fact in our society, but it is a fact none the less, that the higher the percentage of "diversity" in a given area, the higher the crime rate tends to be and the worse the public school system will be . . .

University towns tend to have higher rental rates than non-university towns . . .

Trade offs.

I don't want to discourage you from moving if you're in a really crummy or depressed area. To be sure, some places are much better than others. But one of the best things you can have in any place is close family nearby and an existing network of friends -- something you won't have at first in a totally new place.

You're kidding with this post I hope.

Scaring someone with hurricanes, mudslides and earthquakes.

Tell me where you can live that doesn't have natural disasters?

I live on the East Coast and had 90 mph winds 2 weeks ago--should I move somewhere else?

What's wrong with medical marijuana? You're allowed to drink alcohol and what I do in the privacy of my own home should be up to me. Isn't this a free country--isn't that what republicans want--freedom--Oh yeah the republican way is you're only free if you want to live under their rules.

And what's wrong with hippies? You don't like their way of life so you must criticize them in a post. Are you saying there are no hippies elsewhere. I lived in La Jolla CA recently for a few years and didn't see many hippies there--but shoot, I lived 3 houses up from the beach with an Ocean view so it was expensive and I worried about hurricanes all the time.

If you want to move then move. I've lived in California-Northern, Central and Southern, AZ, TX, FL, MI, MA, NH, and Hawaii. I had a good time everywhere I've lived. You need to know why you are living there and take advantages of the good things.

Of all those places I prefer California. I have a great job right now so I have chosen to live on the east coast for now but I will move back.

I say move if you have the desire--it's a big world out there and life is short so check it out!!!

Logan

[backtoschool]

You're kidding with this post I hope.

Scaring someone with hurricanes, mudslides and earthquakes.

Tell me where you can live that doesn't have natural disasters?

I live on the East Coast and had 90 mph winds 2 weeks ago--should I move somewhere else?

What's wrong with medical marijuana? You're allowed to drink alcohol and what I do in the privacy of my own home should be up to me. Isn't this a free country--isn't that what republicans want--freedom--Oh yeah the republican way is you're only free if you want to live under their rules.

And what's wrong with hippies? You don't like their way of life so you must criticize them in a post. Are you saying there are no hippies elsewhere. I lived in La Jolla CA recently for a few years and didn't see many hippies there--but shoot, I lived 3 houses up from the beach with an Ocean view so it was expensive and I worried about hurricanes all the time.

If you want to move then move. I've lived in California-Northern, Central and Southern, AZ, TX, FL, MI, MA, NH, and Hawaii. I had a good time everywhere I've lived. You need to know why you are living there and take advantages of the good things.

Of all those places I prefer California. I have a great job right now so I have chosen to live on the east coast for now but I will move back.

I say move if you have the desire--it's a big world out there and life is short so check it out!!!

Logan

MSbklawyer was joking. That is why he had the wink in his post.

[MSbklawyer]

You're kidding with this post I hope.

Scaring someone with hurricanes, mudslides and earthquakes.

Tell me where you can live that doesn't have natural disasters?

That's exactly the point I was making.

What's wrong with medical marijuana? . . .and what I do in the privacy of my own home should be up to me.
And what's wrong with hippies? . . .
Are you saying there are no hippies elsewhere? I lived in La Jolla CA recently for a few years and didn't see many hippies there--but shoot, I lived 3 houses up from the beach with an Ocean view so it was expensive and I worried about hurricanes all the time.

The problem is that hippies smoke medical marijuana for non-medical reasons. If they smoke too much of it, it makes them paranoid and they start having delusions that people are criticizing them and their medical marijuana in internet posts. And they become fearful that 'evil republicans' may be trying to take their pot away from them so that they can't smoke it -- even in their own homes. Then the hippies lash out at those people even though they have no idea what those people were really talking about.

And if the hippie lives in La Jolla, in the really advanced stages of their marijuana-induced paranoia, the hippies start worrying all the time that they're going to have a hurricane there -- especially if they live near the beach with an ocean view -- though there hasn't been one there in over 150 years.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1858_San_Diego_hurricane

[helpmeout]

I live in NJ, it pretty much has everything you are looking for except the year round warm weather.

To be honest, all of what you want comes with a price tag. My average childcare costs for a 2nd and 4th grader is $850-$900 a month. And this is with the cheap breakfast program (if my kids' school did not offer this, $150 a month would be added to my childcare costs). There are jobs here (the company I work for is in the process of hiring several people for various positions, most of them newly created), but there's also a whole lot of qualified people applying for those positions.

I would think long and hard before moving your family to a place that just may make your financial situation worse.

[MSbklawyer]

I live in NJ, it pretty much has everything you are looking for except the year round warm weather.

To be honest, all of what you want comes with a price tag. My average childcare costs for a 2nd and 4th grader is $850-$900 a month. And this is with the cheap breakfast program (if my kids' school did not offer this, $150 a month would be added to my childcare costs). There are jobs here (the company I work for is in the process of hiring several people for various positions, most of them newly created), but there's also a whole lot of qualified people applying for those positions.

I would think long and hard before moving your family to a place that just may make your financial situation worse.

Sounds like opening a daycare might be a good business plan.

At $850 per kid per month, if you kept only a dozen of them you'd make a pretty good living.

[beachymama]

I have relatives in Ridgewood, NJ, but I could I ever afford to buy in New Jersey. It seems like NY/NJ families are moving to Florida because the cost of living in the NE is so high.