Everyone Read!!!

[Minnymouth]

This is just a REMINDER, that we are all here for the same reason - we are/or have filed bankruptcy.

What brought us to this phase in our lives is different for each one of us, but basically we all are in the same "financial" stage of not being able to pay our bills.

Many of us fought filing for a long time before we filed. Some of us have worked extra jobs, sold our homes, our belongings just trying to make ends meet. Many of us should have filed sooner than we did.

Most of us filing bankruptcy was the only way OUT of our financial problems. Though some DO FILE to take the easy way out or to "beat the system" so to speak and leave their creditos holding the bag.

The outcome is the same for all of us - OUR CREDIT IS RUINED BY BANKRUPTCY..... and then we have to regroup and reorganize our lives.

Some learn a lot from filing bankruptcy and get their lives back on track, some don't and end up in the same position again years later.

We are not on this forum to "judge" anyone nor to "criticize" their reasons for filing. We may not agree with them or the choices they make for themselves or their reasons.

We all were raised differently in our approach to our financial affairs. Many were raised with the attitude that "you always pay your bills - no matter what it takes"..... and some "so what - let it be the creditors loss"!

I ask that EACH OF YOU read the Forum Rules and refresh yourself on what is acceptable on the Forum, especially all you new folks that have joined us.

We are a support group - not judges....or lawyers. We offer mental support, emotionaly support, offer suggestions, ideas, and try to help you through the difficulties of filing bankruptcy.

Please be understanding and patient when it comes to fellow members, many are completely "stressed out" over their circumstances and trying to deal with them.

We want to help them, not make it worse for them....

We, as Moderators, want our Forum to be the BEST BANKRUTPCY SUPPORT FORUM ON THE WEB.

With all members helping, we can be...

Members who want to disrupt the Forum will be dealt with by the staff of Moderators. If you have a problem with another member on the forum, contact a Moderator to handle the situation for you before it gets out of hand on the forum. That's why we are here and available at all times.

Enough said....... now lets get on with helping others!!!

[$$only4ever]

Minnymouth,

Very well said!!! When someone posts on this forum, the expectation should not be to make them worse. I orginally posted on another forum when I first filed bankruptcy. At first, the forum was great, but all it took was a few "know it alls" and people on their ego trips to ruin the concept of why there was a forum.

A good rule to remember is: Treat people as you would like to be treated. We are all in this together!!

[Cassiopeia]

Bravo to you both! Well said. I am SO happy to be a part of this forum.

[familyof7]

I AGREE!! This is a great forum!

[BKTango]

Thank you Minny. Well said.

[JRScott]

Well put

I sometimes worry how folks will take my posts .

[guzzie]

couldn't have said it better...

[BKTango]

Well put

I sometimes worry how folks will take my posts .

Oh I hear you. I feel like I end up apologizing more and more and putting disclaimers on my posts. I know sometimes I don't word my posts exactly how I am thinking of what I should say and sometimes...I tend to be blunt, but in a nice way. I just fear that they are taken wrong alot. I know I certainly never want to offend anyone, and if I have I do apologize. Never meant any harm, only meant to help.

[gamom02]

Thank you.

[freshstart06]

WELL SAID!!! I am so glad you wrote this. BK is hard on us mentally so it is easy for us to already feel under attack and defensive. So when someone actually has to nerve to judge that makes us feel worse.

BKtango, we all know you, you are blunt and to the point that is just your personality...You are okay in my book. We had our little disagreement but I was mainly stressed out about my 341 meeting that was coming up.

JRScott, are you kidding??? you only have kind things to say. You should never worry about what you say in post.

I love the support this board offers and I feel there are times when you have to put your foot down and not bite your tongue when someone is about to make a major mistake and miss up their case. But no one should judge another situation, 9 times out of 10 we never reveal the complete story and it is usually worse then what we stated and to have someone judge you and not know you or the complete story, hurts.

[CindyLou]

Thanks, Minny, I hope that the right people do read this. I am glad that I did!! We can all use a reminder of why we are here. There are times when typing that things dont always come our right, but then there are times when people are just downright insenstive. I can tell you that if I ever come across as insensitve it is not because I have intended it. It has been unintentional and I will always try to come back and apologize if I realize it. Usually if I am direct it is in protection of someone in our "family" of another who is being judgemental of their sitiuation. Thanks for the post.

[HRx]

Very well put...and ditto!

[Bandit]

I feel it is important to keep reminding ourselves that BK is about forgiveness. It is not just about our own problems. If we want to or have been forgiven then we must forgive the others. It does not matter how or why, the person is filing a petition for forgivenss over debt. Which chapter someone ends up with does not matter either. I suppose I would have a different opinion if someone clanged up 100,000 in cash advances and snorted drugs all the way to the bank because I view that as selfishness...yet even with that, they also have the right under the law to get their lives back on track and be forgiven. It does not matter how poor you are or how rich you are or if it was a divorce, medical, bad spending habits, gambling, drugs, whatever the case...EVERYONE deserves a second chance.

I only belonged to two other forums. One for the world religions and one for cars. All I saw at them was people fighting and arguing over who has the best car and who has the only right religion. If BK was about that, then I would leave immediately. This one (BKForum) is different because it offers REAL HELP for one of the most difficult challenges and decisions any one will ever make. It helps people to make the right decisions and do it in order the best way possible.

When I first came here I was just like everyone else. Sad, guilty, nervous, wrecked and hopeless. I knew nothing about BK or how to help myself get through this. Then I saw that the people really are trying to help each other, offer sound advice and info while forgiving them and that is what lifted me up and gave me hope.

You do not have to agree with all of this but it is just the way it is for me.

Minny, if I step way out of line then step on my toe. I need this place right now and do not want to abuse it or take for granted the help that is being offered.

Thank you for having me.

[CindyLou]

Bandit,
You're awewsome!!!

[Bandit]

Cindylynnsmith,
You are awesome too. Cheers!