Anyone divorce first then do BK?

[JJCA]

Thanks for the replies. I have yet to figure out what we are doing. At this point I guess we are 'waiting' and putting 'time' between our last charges & filing at least. I posted a separate question about 'legal separation' and BK. Will see if anyone has insight into that. It looks like from replies here & research that BK before divorce is 'best'. But that delays the divorce even more..and make me feel like I am in 'limbo'. Even waiting to file BK is making me feel like I can't move on with life. What a mess!!!! I have noticed that I am definitely not alone in this dilemma! And it gets worse it seems...When going to look at places to rent, having bad credit (now that we are not paying CC) means hard to find a place to live even. How the heck people divorce & move on is beyond me!

JJ

[BananaCabana]

I read an article the other day about how the "experts" think that there will be a surge in the number of divorces once the economy improves enough. The substance of the article was that there are many marriages where the partners are wanting to divorce (several due to BK, job losses or just the economy in general) but cannot afford to live apart at this time. Therefore they are living seperate yet combined lives in the same home until things improve to the point that they can both be able to live on their own.

I know that when my husband and I looked at things we fall into this category. We can do a lot by combining our income but seperately we will be left with very little. Neither one of us could survive on our own yet when you figure in that we have children to care for. With a guaranteed child support I might be able to pull it off but he has already proven that unless he has his wages garnished he will not pay the support. And with the state telling me that it could take 6-9 months before a garnishment would be ordered and go through I would not be able to do it.

So I can see how many spouses are waiting to divorce until it is financially feasible.

[TomInVB]

We are in the same boat, but we're trying to keep things as amicable as possible. Staying together, though apart, does have its advantages. More power with the dollars. We're doing BK first then divorce. The only area that we have an issue is in the home. We're officially underwater on the home now (thanks to our neighbor), so walking away is what I think is best, but who knows.

Good luck.

[JJCA]

I think we are going to end up doing BK first also. It makes me be in 'limbo' longer..since we have to wait a few months to start BK..then wait for it to be over & then file divorce. But that seems to be the best option in general. As little equity as it seems we have in our house, it still seems to be a factor in everything! Like, if we were to divorce, and I give house to hubby (he won't be able to refinance, so my name would still be on loan) and then I file BK, they can take the house from hubby! (AND..with divorce there is less protection for the house) If we do BK first, then divorce..there still may be to much equity for System 1 under CA law, and if we do System 2, we have 'too many' assets because of the cars! We seem to be in a now win situation. Oh well..until we start getting sued..we will just 'hold on' I guess! I had heard of people who want to divorce but can't...now I am one of them!!

[ruttie]

we will be filing our bk this Friday.(retained attorney in Dec.)( we have 1 corp. judgement against us & 1 personal pending, which we will now stop with the bk) I feel pretty good, because we have been truthful with everything.( changed our mind a few times, and came clean with everything, some of which didn't matter anyways it isn't worth the thought of trying to hope they won't discover that something, that may bite you in the butt in the longrun) we decided almost a year ago to split up, and have been under the same roof since then. He just started a job out of state, which is good for both of us. We have had a few big fights, but we both know where we are going, so theres no sense in putting us through all this bs everytime we fight. It has been a long time coming and its sometime hard to see the end of the tunnel, but hopefully in a year from now, we can look back on this and say It really wasn't that bad. Good luck to all of you in this same situation, it will be hard, but please try to be patient, hopefully the end result will be worth it.