I just need to vent, and feel hopeless.

[readytofile]

Right there with ya! We did the same thing, down to pulling money out of 401k's and then owing taxes after we got bumped up to a higher bracket and lost our child tax credits. The longer you wait the longer you just endure the stress. We file on the 16th and I can't tell you how much weight it is off my shoulders already to not have to worry about how to feed my family or put gas in my car!

[2manybills]

debtchains: We've spoken on PM and you know we are right there with you. I can tell you that my DH & I have been married for over 20 years and it definitely put a strain on our marriage for a long time. There was always an undercurrent of panic waiting for the next bill to come in. Then last April when DH got sick, my puppy almost died (3K at Animal Urgent Care) and BofA raised my rates after banking with them for 23 years, which increased our monthly cc bills to 3K a month (and wait till the others followed suit), I melted down. I happened to talk to a good friend of mine that does BK to refer someone else (ha ha), and that started the ball rolling.

We kept looking for a way out, my DH kept working weekends and anything he can to get out of debt, all it did with put strain in our marriage and our health.

This is the best thing we ever did. We are staying in our home (not reaffirming), we just paid off DH's car and actually have a few bucks in savings. We are almost at the finish line on this and I just checked our credit scores. Although they plummeted down to 545 when we filed, they are already up to 699.

So hang in there. As I've said on other posts, none of us created this debt thinking we weren't going to pay these bills, but life's situations have brought us to this, and hey -- the banks changed the rules. When all is said and done, there won't be a sign on our headstones that says "BofA or Citi or whoever is grateful you paid your credit card on time" when we've died from the stress of trying to pay them on time!

[tkharvey]

Great post "2manybills"!!

[Lajazz947]

Great post "2manybills"!!

Ament to that.

I think that my blood pressure has even gone down now that I am discharged.

Last December a week before we filed I was in the hospital with the doctors thinking I had had a heart attack at 51 years of age !!!!!!!!!

Doctor thinks it was high blood pressure triggered on by stress.

That did it for me. We decided to file right then and there even though it would have been advantageous to wait until March of this year.

Think of your health, your kids and your marriage first, creditors and FICO score last.

[justcurious]

Think of your health, your kids and your marriage first, creditors and FICO score last.

I agree. Don't think of yourself as a failure. BK happens to the best of us; the only way you really fail in life is if you stop being a good person.

You made a business decision - one you are legally allowed to make - to help your family and get back on firm footing and there's nothing wrong with that. Don't feel ashamed, feel good you have a nice family.