This is probably wrong of me, but I feel like the BK is a start of something new for me. I feel like ever since I read the first information article about BK and started investigating it, that it was a true answer to my prayers.
Don't get me wrong, I know its not something one should aspire to do. But when you are in over your head and find there is a way out, it makes you feel like you can breathe again!
A little background...my hubby and I never discussed money. I payed the bills, I made the financial decisions. A lot of bad decisions, life changes, and mother in law problems later, we are over 100K in credit card debt. We have a house, paid off our cars...never late on a payment..ever. Only the bigger those balances got, the more I borrowed from one cc to pay another. Snowball after snowball. I wouldnt tell my hubby because I was afraid he would be furious, afraid he would be disappointed in me.
Ever since I realized that I couldnt go on doing what I was doing, I put a stop to it. Sat down with my hubby, told him our situation and told him we need to file BK 13. I told him it would be hard, we would be on a strict budget and then I braced myself.
He was upset for a day...but not at me. Mostly at himself for not taking a more active roll in our financial decisions. Also at his mom for being irresponsible with her money and guilting us into paying her bills monthly. (he is an only child and tends to think we are responsible for her...but now realizes she is responsible for herself).
Now, its like a whole new life. We discuss our money DAILY. We went for a consult with the lawyer together. We retained that lawyer and will file on July 14. We talked about how we were going to save CASH for things and we cut up our credit cards together. We are closer than ever. I feel like finally there are NO secrets between us now.
When I did our debt reduction plan before I considered BK, it said it would take 10 years if we put all our disposable income to debt and that is only if the interest rates didnt change. Now with BK, all our disposable with go to our plan, but it will be gone in 5 years.
Sometimes it takes something bad to make your re-evaluate your life and relationships. It WILL be a hard 5 years, but nothing we can't handle.
Again, Im not thrilled we are filing bankruptcy. But I dont feel the shame or horror that I thought I would feel.
Thanks for listening and for all your great advice! Im sure there will be bumps in the road along the way, but at least my hubby and I are on the same page and can deal with them together instead of me laying in bed at night with that HUGE 100K problem to deal with by myself.
Don't get me wrong, I know its not something one should aspire to do. But when you are in over your head and find there is a way out, it makes you feel like you can breathe again!
A little background...my hubby and I never discussed money. I payed the bills, I made the financial decisions. A lot of bad decisions, life changes, and mother in law problems later, we are over 100K in credit card debt. We have a house, paid off our cars...never late on a payment..ever. Only the bigger those balances got, the more I borrowed from one cc to pay another. Snowball after snowball. I wouldnt tell my hubby because I was afraid he would be furious, afraid he would be disappointed in me.
Ever since I realized that I couldnt go on doing what I was doing, I put a stop to it. Sat down with my hubby, told him our situation and told him we need to file BK 13. I told him it would be hard, we would be on a strict budget and then I braced myself.
He was upset for a day...but not at me. Mostly at himself for not taking a more active roll in our financial decisions. Also at his mom for being irresponsible with her money and guilting us into paying her bills monthly. (he is an only child and tends to think we are responsible for her...but now realizes she is responsible for herself).
Now, its like a whole new life. We discuss our money DAILY. We went for a consult with the lawyer together. We retained that lawyer and will file on July 14. We talked about how we were going to save CASH for things and we cut up our credit cards together. We are closer than ever. I feel like finally there are NO secrets between us now.
When I did our debt reduction plan before I considered BK, it said it would take 10 years if we put all our disposable income to debt and that is only if the interest rates didnt change. Now with BK, all our disposable with go to our plan, but it will be gone in 5 years.
Sometimes it takes something bad to make your re-evaluate your life and relationships. It WILL be a hard 5 years, but nothing we can't handle.
Again, Im not thrilled we are filing bankruptcy. But I dont feel the shame or horror that I thought I would feel.
Thanks for listening and for all your great advice! Im sure there will be bumps in the road along the way, but at least my hubby and I are on the same page and can deal with them together instead of me laying in bed at night with that HUGE 100K problem to deal with by myself.
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