new to board and questions (long)

[StartingOver08]

I agree with danaf...in fact what I think should be done is not printable in this forum!

[frustrated7]

Everyone, thank you so much for understanding. My husband and I are fighting constantly about it. We were on the same page before FIL got involved, and now we have huge fights every day about this. The attorney refuses to make any phone calls, and flat out said that he mails the offer letter and then that's it. What the h***? We can mail a letter, if that's all he's doing. Why is he getting paid the big bucks to do this?

My husband simply won't stand up to his father and will do whatever his father says. It's become much worse these past few months since his father knows about our financial situation and since the loan offer. I think my husband is afraid if he sets any sort of boundary with his father that the money will then be denied to us. Which makes me all the more sure that this is a giant mistake. Too bad I can't get my husband to understand that.

Has anyone been in a situation even remotely like this before? One where you and your spouse are on totally separate pages when it comes to BK? We don't even know what we would lose in a Chapter 7, if anything, and even if we lose something it would be better than living like this!

Also, does anyone know how furniture and jewelry gets exempted in Illinois? Do you have to use your wildcard to literally keep a bed to sleep in and a couch to sit on? Because that is what it looks like to me.

Thanks everyone for your support and understanding.

[brokenbuthealed]

You won't lose nearly as much as you're thinking. It would probably be good for you and hubby to see a bankruptcy attorney for a consultation just to see. Maybe if you could get him to just meet with someone to talk about what property you will be able to keep he'll see it's not as bad as it may seem to file.

[Over our heads]

Just because I am a rotten lady, if I were in your shoes, I'd tell the hubs that he can either see a BK lawyer with you now, or he can see one w/o you after the divorce is final and you have filed bk on your own!

The position you are in is awful to say the least, and adding meddling in-laws just makes it even more so. When you finally have room to breathe, get a nice bottle of bubbly and have a long nice bath!

[kristyf]

frustrated... this is what is exempt in IL

* All clothing;
* Up to $2,400.00 (per person) of equity in a motor vehicle;
* Up to $15,000.00 (per person) of equity in your personal residence; ($30,000.00 for a married couple).
* Certain Life Insurance Policies;
* All IRAs, Annuities, 401K Plans and other retirement funds;
* $1,500.00 of tools of your trade;
* Up to $10,000.00 of proceeds from a personal injury claim;
* $4,000.00 (per person) of miscellaneous personal property; ($8,000.00 for a married couple).


i got that from a lawyer's website in IL - http://www.rockriverlaw.net/Practice...Exemptions.asp

[StartingOver08]

Check your exemptions for your district here:

http://www.legalconsumer.com/bankruptcy/state_bankruptcy_info.php?st_fullName=Illinois

[frustrated7]

A million thank you's for all this information and support! That website link for the attorney's office in Illinois gives numbers that are double all the other numbers for exemptions I have looked at so far. I'm hoping the higher numbers for exemptions are the correct numbers and everything else is just wrong. I really would feel better if I could meet with a BK attorney and I think my husband would feel better about it too, but he won't agree to go. Everytime we even talk about any of this we end up in a huge fight. I really appreciate all of you helping me out.

[OhioFiler]

It reads to me as though you need both legal advice and counseling. I suggest you find a counselor who accepts payment based on income on a sliding scale AND visit a BK attorney with or without your husband.

Your husband's reliance on your father-in-law to settle this matter is extremely puzzling to me.

Probably the greatest stress placed on a marriage is financial difficulty. I hope your marriage is able to survive this turmoil. Your emotional and mental health should be most important to you and your husband fails to recognize this.