My grand realization

[kristyf]

okay, it's not that grand.


I was thinking of how, exactly, to tell my mother that I'm filing for bankruptcy. And I realized that I HAVE NEVER LIVED WITHIN MY MEANS. I'm only 27, but since college when I started having loans and credit cards, I just never lived with the motto 'if i don't have the money, i can't buy it.' HOW SAD IS THAT?

I did not *intentionally* get into truckloads of debt, but here I am! Now that we are completely maxed out on our credit cards and no lender will touch us with a 10ft pole, I'm here about to file bankruptcy.

Sure, there were many things out of my control, like pay or lack thereof, misc surprise bills, etc. but STILL. I could have put aside money for these situations - which is what I need to learn to do.

So now I need to learn what I've always known - to live within our means. I majored in ACCOUNTANCY - ya think i'd learn a thing or two. but no. had to come to this.

anyway, just had to let out my frustration with myself. thanks.

[Flowers]

don't be so hard on yourself.
Things will change from here for you, they have too.

[Trixie007]

Once you get over feeling frustrated and start actually living within your means, I know you'll find it to be immensely satisfying. I know we did!!

[AngelinaCatHub]

Greetings again Kristy. First, what think we all got here???? In my case, we had a bunch of money and my “male ego” stood against a millionaire bully. He had more money and took out three of our jobs and then I got sick (carcinoma). Saying this, I also am guilty of abusing credit. Now in our case, we lived far below our means. This got us a credit score of 820 and I don’t think many can top this.

However, like you, my realization set me straight and I had to make this business decision. Now that we both agree, what to do in the future? I have not bounced a check in 44 years. Last year about 20 and at 30 bucks not counting pick up charges what do you think it cost? My solution, checks ran out, I refuse to order more. Cash is King and a budget is Queen. I have found “AngelFoodMinistries.com” that is just great for good but not fancy food.

Bottom line is; the best thing I have done is bk as I learned a lot from my mistakes. I can now mentor folks here and there as what works for us. Bad times are coming I am afraid, and the sooner you learn that being in debt to another is “servitude”. Don’t be a slave to “things”.

All here on this forum are wise people to me as they found it and wish to improve their lives. Those mentors here to help have learned enough to wisely give their own story.

Wish you well. ‘Hub

[Never_Again]

The satisfaction of living within your means is incredible! If you learn a lesson from all of this, you will be so much further ahead. It sounds like you are well on your way to that learning process!

What was the worst for me, is that I always knew how to do things right! I just didn't follow it. That is one thing that made it tough for me to finally get to the point of filing. It was like admitting defeat. It was defeat... defeat of an attitude that we need more and more things to be happy. We don't!

[southernbelle]

I love the fact that I now live with a strict budget and follow the cash and carry rule. My mom was old school and never used credit, saved to buy things we needed, and often used layways. I used to think she was crazy, but now I realize that's the way to go. Credit is trouble and it entices us to spend money we don't have to buy stuff we can't afford.

Now that I am forced to keep track of every dime I spend, I'm more frugal with everything and I'm always looking for ways to save money (especially with the uncertainty of this economy). BK changed my life for the better and this forum made me realize I wasn't alone.

P.S. Too bad it's really hard to find anyone to layway with anymore. Walmart used to, but they don't any more. Too bad because that was my way of buying stuff for my house without using credit.

[Flamingo]

I love the fact that I now live with a strict budget and follow the cash and carry rule. My mom was old school and never used credit, saved to buy things we needed, and often used layways. I used to think she was crazy, but now I realize that's the way to go. Credit is trouble and it entices us to spend money we don't have to buy stuff we can't afford.

Now that I am forced to keep track of every dime I spend, I'm more frugal with everything and I'm always looking for ways to save money (especially with the uncertainty of this economy). BK changed my life for the better and this forum made me realize I wasn't alone.

P.S. Too bad it's really hard to find anyone to layway with anymore. Walmart used to, but they don't any more. Too bad because that was my way of buying stuff for my house without using credit.

K-Mart is doing layaways again if there is one in your area.

To the OP and anyone reading this - there was a quote in a recent financial article which should stay in your mind - "A credit card is a snake in your pocket." I don't think anyone can describe it better.

[CatsInTrouble]

re: living below your means. In the last couple months, for the first time, we have been making purchases cash only and I had NO IDEA HOW GOOD IT WOULD FEEL TO PAY FOR SOMETHING ONCE AND BE DONE WITH IT.

It feels like walking around with weights magically lifted off your back. I know most of you already know what I'mt alking about, and some of you may be saying "DUH" but GOD it is just a different feeling to pay cash, walk out, and be DONE WITH IT!

[AngelinaCatHub]

re: living below your means. In the last couple months, for the first time, we have been making purchases cash only and I had NO IDEA HOW GOOD IT WOULD FEEL TO PAY FOR SOMETHING ONCE AND BE DONE WITH IT.

It feels like walking around with weights magically lifted off your back. I know most of you already know what I'mt alking about, and some of you may be saying "DUH" but GOD it is just a different feeling to pay cash, walk out, and be DONE WITH IT!

[WoodSprite]

okay, it's not that grand.

So now I need to learn what I've always known - to live within our means. I majored in ACCOUNTANCY - ya think i'd learn a thing or two. but no. had to come to this.

I don't know, it sounds pretty grand to me. An awful lot of people never get to this point.

Kristy, if it's any help to you, think of it this way: you have learned a hard lesson early enough in your life to benefit from it. Kudos to you for taking responsibility for your own mistakes, and for having the good sense and courage to pull yourself out and change your path. You've resisted the temptation to wallow in the trap of blaming the government, the banks, the credit card companies, etc, and it sounds as if you're on the path to a better life. So far, so good. It gets better, it really does.