Compulsive Gambling Bankruptcies

[CindyLou]

My husband is bipolar and has/had a shopping addiction. He is on 5 different types of meds now and the compulsion to shop is MUCH MUCH MUCH less and he is feeling much happeir with more stable mood. The meds saved our marriage and, I believe his life.

[VinMan]

This online gambling might be something that CC companies don't want to challenge because if I'm not mistaken it is illeagle for U.S. banks to send money to off shore books and casinos that are online based. The Casino's and sportsbooks use alias names and websites so that the charges are approved and go through.

Wish someone would chime in that really new about this.

[tounces]

Hi-I'm Mary and I'm a gambling addict.Well actually my husband and I both love to gamble. Double whammy!!! I've spent countless money and time at the casino-also online gambling sportsbook. I've been a heavy gambler for about 4yrs now. My last time at the casino was april of this year.

I consulted with an attorney in Feb. Made a downpayment.-(could have paid all the fees then with tax money but why would I --then I wouldn't have any money to go to the casino with.) As you can see still in denial.

My breaking point was in April when I had to call my mother for 2000 to pay my mortgage. After that call I vowed to never gamble again. I married at 20 and I'll be 40 this year-In those 20 yrs I've never had to ask for any money. I realized then that my gambling was now affecting her. She still doesn't know of my gambling addiction. I cried for a week after she sent the money.

I read in a post that really got me thinking- I'm I recovering from gambling or is it just that I dont have money to gamble with. If I can get out of this mess will the urge still be there. I will be attending my first GA meeting on Tuesday. I'm scared to death. not sure why but I am.

I sold a boat recently for 2400 and the first thing that went thru my mind was-OK now I've got money,lets go to the casino and see what I can turn this into!! It was just a fleeting thought and no I didn't go. Instead I have paid my lawyer.

Well if you got this far I appreciate it. Scared to file for chapter 7 but theres nothing else I can do. Not sure how the courts will look at this? I'm about 120,000 in cc debt. not all from gambling but at this point does it really matter?

[beyondtherapy]

Hi-I'm Mary and I'm a gambling addict.

I read in a post that really got me thinking- [Am] I recovering from gambling or is it just that I dont have money to gamble with[?] If I can get out of this mess will the urge still be there[?] I will be attending my first GA meeting on Tuesday. I'm scared to death. not sure why but I am.

Well if you got this far I appreciate it. Scared to file for chapter 7 but theres nothing else I can do. Not sure how the courts will look at this? I'm about 120,000 in cc debt. not all from gambling but at this point does it really matter?

Mary- this is the original poster of this thread here, beyond therapy. I'm going to give you tough love. I know where of I speak. Please take heed.

First- congratulations on admitting you have a problem --"Hi-I'm Mary and I'm a gambling addict"-- and for taking it on yourself and not playing the blame game, trying to pin your problems on anything or anyone else besides you and the poor choices you've made.

Now you've made an excellent choice. The choice to name publicly what you have- an addiction- and to seek out help from those who have been down this road.

You ask "[Am] I recovering from gambling or is it just that I don't have money to gamble with[?]" Mary, it is without shadow of doubt the latter.

You need to find someone who you trust (not your husband, who you say is also a compulsive gambler) to take control of your finances while you sort your situation out. A family member, a friend, a clergy member... someone. Someone who will watch over you and help keep you in check and strong. GA meetings are all well and good, but you need specific and tactical strategies to get yourself out of this downward spiral. Filing a successful bankruptcy will do less than nothing for you if in the end you wind up gambling again anyway.

You can go to the land based casinos and have yourself excluded from playing there. Give them a copy of your driver's license and tell them if you arrive on site to immediately evict you with extreme prejudice. Contact all online casinos and have them ban you from playing or joining. Corroborate all of these actions with your care-keeper, and make she s/he stays on top of your efforts to cease gambling.

You should not be in control of any money right now. Someone you TRUST who knows of your addiction and your plan for bankruptcy should have complete and exclusive power to ration your funds. You should give yourself a weekly cash allowance that can cover the basic essentials, bills, expenses, etc and then you should be cut off from your funds while you PLAN for your bankruptcy.

And here's where the second part of your question comes in: "Not sure how the courts will look at this? I'm about 120,000 in cc debt. not all from gambling but at this point does it really matter?"

You need to give your debt time to age. You should speak with an seasoned, experienced, and accessible bankruptcy attorney about your specific situation ASAP. Don't settle for the first one you speak with- interview between three to five (initial consultations should be free- I would advise to stay away from attorneys who charge you for a first meeting) and go with the one you feel most comfortable with. Comfort is key because *you have to divulge everything to your attorney.* Only then can s/he advise to the best of her ability.

A lot of your fear is coming from not knowing what to expect. Knowledge is power and it is empowering. Educate yourself about your options and make a plan. Make a plan for bankruptcy, make a plan- and find a good partner- with quitting gambling, and stick to it. You can do this. I believe in you.

-Beyond Therapy

Compulsive Gambler
Last Day Gambled Feb 14th 2009
Filed April 13 2009
341 Meeting May 27th 2009
Last day for objections- July 27th 2009

[tounces]

HI Beyondtherapy , Thanks for the tough love. I know I need it! After I read your reply-I sent an email to my attorney disclosing my gambling problem. I'll see what he has to say. When I met with him in Feb. I was scared,embarressed. I know there was a question on the form about gambling but I just left it blank. I was hoping I could get thru this without having to admit I have a problem, but guilt alone is eating me alive. I wish I had found this forum before consulting with an attorney. When I met with him, I was in such a daze because I had just come from the casino!!(what a sad thing to admit) Funny thing is if I had won money that trip I wouldn't have went to the meeting. The writing has been on the wall for months or yrs and i've just chosen to ignore it. I'm tired of living on a rollercoaster. I'm tired of gambling. I'm tired of worrying. I'm done spending 20-40hrs at a time at the casino!!! I've forgotten how normal people live. What to do with free time.

I'm hoping my lawyer will still be able to help me if not I will search till I find one. You've definitly given me something to think about re handling money.

Thanks again -Mary

[beyondtherapy]

Good job. Keep your thoughts and focus on life free of gambling, free of debt. Free to live. We gamble not to win money, but to get a thrill, like the drug addict shoots heroin or the alcoholic drinks whiskey. I know what I am talking about. I wish I didn't. But as a fellow addict, who is in recovery but always taking it one day at a time, I'm here to tell you you can overcome this. But it takes diligence, and it takes partners. Partners are key. You need to keep yourself in check. Consider telling your mother, or a close friend. Someone you trust who will not judge and who will help you stay on track.

Good luck. I believe in you.

BT

[trouble1]

also gambling debt here

Hi all. I also and am in deep debt due to gambling. I have racked up about $110,000 over the last 5 years due to a serious gambling problem. It all stopped when my wife caught me and it was a huge relief. I haven't gambled in over 8 months and never plan to ever again.

I have my first consultation with a lawyer in 2 days. Can beyond therapy or anyone else give any insight as to how their BK went? Did it go smoothly or was it more intense due to the nature of the debt? I am extremely nervous and I am just ready to put all of this behind me so my family and I can move forward.

[junker]

when i lived in northeast florida..a bank actually froze and closed my acct for using the debit card for LEGAL gambling on line...luckily i had no outstanding checks or they would have been sent back....the casinos are a big rip...but i dont see much difference in horses or dogs...verses stock market...i have a friend that used up his wifes 400k inheritance gambling....but then i read about bernie madoffs victims losing that much also...and i am sure some portfolios have lost that much also.....

[Faust]

Okay...I had no intention of disclosing this because I didn't want to be "burned at the stake" on this site and because I was sooooo embarrassed about my addiction...but my debt is because of my gambling addiction (thank you Beyondtherapy for bringing out this sensitive subject). There I said it...

Anyway, this is what I've been told (I live in SoCal); the cc can/might/most likely will challenge our cc charges/cash advances, there will be red flags and the Trustee may frown upon my charges/advancements, etc., unless I was/am seeking help for my addiction. I have been in therapy/GA since May 2008 and gamble-free since Oct. 16, 2007. At the time when I was doing BT/Cash Advances, I had every intention of paying back my cc's, it wasn't until the cc interest rates skyrocketed (never was late, but pretty much maxed out on every card) and I couldn't keep up with the min monthly payments of $1,600 month. We tried everything to pay off the cc, refinance our home (the housing market turned south), tried to negotiate with the creditors, etc, but nothing. We decided go the ch 13 route because we (my attorney, hubby and I) thought it would "look better" to the Trustee if we were at least trying to pay back the debt. I've searched the older threads and came across a few people that have filed ch 7 because of gambling debt, some were discharged, no problem and some were put through the ringer by their Trustee...so I guess it depends on your district/trustee.

Okay, go ahead and light your torches...

Here are some great sites if you need additional support :

https://www.sfchub.com

www.dailystrength.org

You'll get no fire from me!

I wish you well in the future and hope you continue to defeat your addiction!

[backwoods]

Just wanted to say that we're in CH13 largely due to my substance addicition. As a result I can certainly understand where folks are coming from who have a gambling addiction.

Although I've been through treatment and clean and in recovery for three years the debt problems caused by my inability to hold a job snowballed to the point where we really had no choice-the IRS coming after me was the final straw.

The reason I posted this is to let the OP know that when we met with the attorney I too was nervous over whether he would "judge" me etc. The fact of the matter is that he didn't ask any questions regarding why were delcaring. In fact, this particular attorney seemed like he could care less about our personal situation and I came away feeling like our BK was just another business deal for him.

Some further thoughts regarding BK and addictions: I often get angry/depressed because it seems like things are not "getting better". In reality, declaring BK is probably one of the best decisions my wife and I have made. Although the $$ is tight due to the budget, our bills are paid up each month, utility companies don't threaten to turn the power off etc, the phone doesn't ring off the hook and I am slowly regaining dignity knowing I am taking responsibility for my mistakes.

Don't let shame over your addiction keep you from seeking legal help. I looked at it this way-after all I'd been through with the drug problems I basically have no shame! The only mistake we made was not declaring BK a year earlier-if we had we probably be done by now.