My Husbands Big Plan!!

[inozip]

Ok, so yesterday after a grueling fight again about money, and lack thereof,
my DH came up with this brilliant plan.

We just stop paying on everything!! Ok, the cars will be repo'd and then we have no way to GET to work (I say).....

Ok, now plan will be that we stop paying on the credit cards!! but will keep
making mortgage payment on rental house.

After 3 or 4 months, then we will file BK...

Thats his plan...... Genius right?

[Mi Bankruptcy]

Well,
It's somewhat of a plan. The first step. You first need to meet with some lawyers. I would stop paying all the credit cards and just pay on the vehicles & housing. However, like this forum points out all too often. If you stop paying on the credit cards you need to stop using them( common sense and protection). You both also have to realize the fight is about money and not about each other. If there is resentment because one person has "charged" or abused credit you need to address it in the open either before or after (preferably after). The best way to get through this is to plan together. It will ultimately bring you closer when you succeed.

I also suggest after you come up with a plan you both decide who will be responsible to execute their part of the plan (ie) who will list all the bills, who pulls the credit reports, who researches the attorney, who lists the housing budget. Agree together on how much you are willing to pay for an attorney. Discuss before meeting with an attorney what you expect from your attorney.

Additionally,
you must agree each person is responsible for checking each others work. If something gets missed you both are at fault. Not one person.

Genius right? Sarcasam will not help each other or the situation. Remember.. chances are you both got into this together.. Get out of it together.

Last thing,
Both of you should read this forum regarding issues of your plan and discuss what makes sense to you and what you have discovered

[AngelinaCatHub]

Mi Bankruptcy is right:

Genius right? Sarcasam will not help each other or the situation. Remember.. chances are you both got into this together.. Get out of it together.

Last thing,
Both of you should read this forum regarding issues of your plan and discuss what makes sense to you and what you have discovered

This is not the time to alienate each other or cast stones. You are both to blame and you both need each other to lean against. Bk is not fun, and is very stressful. It does eventually give you relief as what it was designed for. Getting through it is still tough.

You have found the best place for very good advice. I suggest have DH read this site as well and as my wife and I have done, we post together and guess what? We don't always agree with each other. M O N E Y (or lack thereof) is the number one reason of a busted marriage. Money is ONLY a tool to use as a medium of essentials first. If all essentuals are taken care of first, then what is left is your "fun" money. No one NEEDS a boat or 57" flat screen TV. You NEED Food, shelter, warmth, and love. That is what you NEED. I wish you well and when the talking stops, the trouble starts, so stay in tune with each other and do more listening and less talking down the other. That goes for both of you. 'Hub

[banca rotta]

Ok, so yesterday after a grueling fight again about money, and lack thereof,
my DH came up with this brilliant plan.

We just stop paying on everything!! Ok, the cars will be repo'd and then we have no way to GET to work (I say).....

Ok, now plan will be that we stop paying on the credit cards!! but will keep
making mortgage payment on rental house.

After 3 or 4 months, then we will file BK...

Thats his plan...... Genius right?

If you strongly feel that you will file bk then yes stop paying the credit cards now and of course don't use them. Have you made any major purchases on them recently?

As for the cars do you have any equity or are you upside down on them? If you can't afford the cars and are really upside down then you may want to consider stopping those payments and buying some older cheaper ones for cash and saving some money for car repairs. This is a tough one since no car payments may force you into a chaper 13 which is no good.

Certainly run all this by several attorneys and see what they all say.


Best of luck to ya. This will pass but you both need to work together and agree on everything you do.

[ready2puke]

some really terrific advice there, but first stop fighting with each other. That will on make everything that is so difficult 1000% worse. Work together not apart and yes stop with the sarcasim please. Im sure your hubby already feels like crap

[Over our heads]

Have to agree with everybody here. Fighting will get you nothing but a headache.

Acknowledge the fact that things suck. If BK is in fact the only option, accept it, and move on.

Then find an attorney you both feel comfortable with and leave it all in their capable hands.

My man and I are MUCH happier leaving (most of) all the bills with the lawyer. We don't fight, neither of us is afraid to tell the other "No you can't buy that because there is no money." And by *that* I mean NEEDFUL things, like, panties, or he needs to replace a pair of work pants.

Good luck to you.

[inozip]

Thanks for all the great replies.!! Tonight I come home after a long day at work to find out DH bought a Brand New Driver!! $400! Put it on the credit card. What can I say?

[Overmylimit]

After reading this thread I gotta ask what does DH stand for.....hopefully the obvious

[banca rotta]

Thanks for all the great replies.!! Tonight I come home after a long day at work to find out DH bought a Brand New Driver!! $400! Put it on the credit card. What can I say?

It's a bigger problem then we can help you with. I think you both need counceling.

[arkienurse]

Thanks for all the great replies.!! Tonight I come home after a long day at work to find out DH bought a Brand New Driver!! $400! Put it on the credit card. What can I say?

I assume you mean a golf club? Maybe threaten to use it on him if he doesn't return it. Or ask him how that will help keep food on the table and a roof over your head right now.

I do feel for you. I am married to a very similar man. It has been a real struggle since filing bk because of him wanting and me not wanting to go in debt so he can satisfy his wants.
Hang in there, maybe ask him to go to some marriage counseling to get some of these issues worked out.

[BKOnce]

Spending Spree = Shopping Compulsive Disorder.

[BigJohn]

After reading this thread I gotta ask what does DH stand for.....hopefully the obvious

Dear Husband.

[Alldayer]

"Deadbeat Husband" I say

[AngelinaCatHub]

"Deadbeat Husband" I say

[BKParalegal]

I think we are missing the most important question. Did the driver help his golf game or not?