How has/did bk affect your physical/mental health?

[Flamingo]

To those who have posted on here as to the anxiety and stress...please note the world will not end due to you filing BK. While things at this point in your life are just as far down in the bowels of hell that they cannot go any lower, meet each day everyday knowing that it will someday be all behind you. It truly does get resolved, go away and get better. It's another of life's learning processes that makes you grow better as a person and as to your financial knowledge. Learn from it. When you really feel down, go outside and take a walk somewhere and look at the beauty around you. Get involved in a hobby that takes up some of your "thinking about the bad things" time....My sister got me involved in beading where I now make bracelets/necklaces (much cheaper to make than buy!) and now my co-workers look forward to presents from me during the holidays where I make everyone a personal bracelet. Not very expensive at all but it takes creativity which gets your mind going elsewhere. Got friends who have a hobby they can take you and the family along and enjoy? How about going to their kids' soccar or baseball games with them and getting involved in some of that or volunteer work at a senior center - they just love folks to come help in there!

I have learned just to let a lot of stuff go that really does not need to be worried about anymore and be thankful for what I do have.

[PoorGrammyinBK7]

We have never had a problem with debt until this judgement. We tried many times to settle with this guy and in fact had left about 3-4 times what the original "debt" would have been - of furniture fixtures and equipment in the business. When we did not hear from him for 2 years we thought it was over and it would have been with anyone reasonable. NOW, because of this and only this (our other small debts were reasonable and manageable, even though we were slightly upside down), we are literally being forced into BK. It isn't fair but thats how it is and we have resigned ourselves to just get it done. I still have fear of this man though - maybe I am paranoid, but it seems he would stop at nothing to hurt us.

[AngelinaCatHub]

PoorGrammy: You said two years. How long was it from the alleged infraction that he sued you? Was it a default judgment? What state are you in?

Here is a good link http://www.statuteoflimitations.net/
'Hub

[AngelinaCatHub]

Also what did he sue you for? In other words, a mortgage, rent, lease? What.

I have my same old Devil as I once asked you about. I too have a person bent upon my ruination. 'Hub

[AngelinaCatHub]

http://www.statuteoflimitations.net/florida_statute_of_limitations.htm

[PoorGrammyinBK7]

Its not even in the state I live in, but its done. We even know about several items charged that were fraudulent in his lawsuit, but we don't have enough $$ to file an appeal. Its done. We are gonna BK.

[PoorGrammyinBK7]

It was a commercial lease - we had signed a personal guaranty - but we were out of the business and had moved out of the state when it closed about 2 years after we moved. The new partner was supposed to sign and never did. He is nowhere to be found. We are just screwed. But we will survive this!!!

[parsoc48]

To the point, I have felt like a 10,000-pound-weight has fallen off my back

the world will not end due to you filing BK. While things at this point in your life are just as far down in the bowels of hell that they cannot go any lower, meet each day everyday knowing that it will someday be all behind you. It truly does get resolved, go away and get better.

Phillyman and Flamingo, you are my heroes! I always look forward to your posts for straightforward advice and common sense. And to Hub and Cat and others who share their stories...thank you.
The stress and anxiety was horrendous for the year prior to filing, especially as DH hates his job and was feeling like he was trapped and never getting ahead. The moment we retained our attorney and could refer the creditors to him was indescribable! Next was the filing, then the 341.
The real hard work is ahead of us for 5 years, as we've never been good at budgeting and saving...but I try to think of it as a challenge and investing in our future. Unfortunately DH isn't as enthused about this as I try to be but we'll make it work somehow.
So persevere, get out an take a walk if you can, enjoy what you do have and believe in yourself.....and help others get through their problems. Stay in touch with us, there is so much amazing knowledge on this forum.

[vleisme]

Deciding to file was the easy part it was dealing with the atty and his blunders and lack of time to fully explain what was going on that was the worst for me. I have read many posts here about bad experiences with the BK atty's ,so I know I was not alone. Thank the lord I finally received the notice of no distribution so it looks like I am on the way to being done with this. It was so scary to worry about losing my home. It is what I have worked forall my life and to lose it because of CC debt would've probably been the end of me!! I am happy to be in credit rehab now it is fine that I cannot have access to all the credit card offers, as before, because now I am forced to learn to control my spending and to live within my means.

[southernbelle]

Before filing I had panic attacks, anxiety, depression, withdrawl from friends and coworkers, stress, increased appetite, headaches, nausea, weight gain, mood swings, nervousness, paranoia, and insomnia. I was constantly afraid that someone would come to the door and take me to debtors prision or something.

The day I signed the paperwork I wanted to scream and jump for joy. No more being hounded by creditors or worrying about how to solve my problems, I was finally doing something to dig myself out of this huge hole.

I still stress out, but not nearly as much as I did. I can actually see a light at the end of the tunnel. I took another poster's advice and try to stay busy. I'm going to the gym and I'm trying to get back into my old routine so that I can get healthy physically, emotionally and financially. I still have a ways to go, but at least this is a start and I keep remembering my mom's old saying: "You can't get blood from a turnip".

Things will get better and you are in the right place to express yourself and to get the moral support you need to get through this.

[momof5]

SouthernBelle: Did you find yourself really getting back to the 'old' you after your 341?

[Footprints1973]

Thanks everyone....you all have given me something I didn't think I could have-- HOPE.

[Phillymanhere]

Footprints,

I want to address something you mentioned in your initial post. I do NOT think there is anything wrong with adjusting your meds to control your anxiety during this time. I think there is everyting RIGHT about it. If not now, when?

By the way, higher dosages of medicines typically don't cost more money than lower dosages. So I'm not sure exactly what you mean when you say you can't adjust your meds because of money. Thirty 100mg pills of medicine X usually cost the same as thirty 50 mg pills of medicine X.

I will assume you mean you can't afford an additional medicine. If that is the case, then consider this: sometimes drug companies have programs where they will disburse meds for free for people who are in a bad financial way. Sometimes doctors have samples they can distribute free to patients. Also, Wal-Mart and Costo and Target and places like that often sell generics for $4 or $5.

As someone who has suffered from serious depression in the past, I totally think you should adjust your meds to help you through this period. If the meds are right, then you'll be more relaxed, you'll sleep better and you'll be able to think and function MUCH better. And if you're in a really bad way right now, then even a slight improvement in function will help you a lot. Once you're through the process, you can, if you want, adjust the meds back down.

If you're feeling this stressed, I say by all means go back to the doctor and beg, if you have to, for stronger meds. Own up to your financial situation and see if the doctor can do anything for you. Just an attempt at giving support to you at a time of high stress. Good luck!

[sick of debt]

[ feel great knowing the there is an end in sight. When I look back now, I think I was in MAJOR denial. I didn't even consider chapter 7 or any type of bankruptcy. I thought I could pay it all down. I wanted to do the right thing. However, long story short, the right thing is to start over. Besides, these credit card companies have probably already made their money from me with the crazy interest rates. [/I]

[southernbelle]

SouthernBelle: Did you find yourself really getting back to the 'old' you after your 341?

I really did. I know there's still a few other issues to deal with after the chapter 7, but I really did feel like the "old" me was returning and that I was getting some normalcy back into my life. I don't ever want to feel the way I did before my divorce, while closing my business and before filing BK. It seemed like everything hit me all at once and creditors were coming out of the woodwork. I can now at least rest at night and I still stress a little, but not like before. Sadly to say I seriously considered suicide at one point because I felt like I was worth more dead than alive, but I read a lot of encouraging words of support and wisdom on this forum that brought me back down to reality.

All of what we've all been through is rough and I don't have anyone to really share this with so this is like my online support group.