New, My Story and HELP please

[One Half Full]

Yes, ITT and on line schools are way more expensive than community colleges, and you get the same education. Once the CC bills and car situation is taken care of, your money will go farther. Try to get some school yourself. Nursing or something (X-Ray techs make pretty good money). If you lack in science or math, tackle it now. With a child it will take a few years longer, but then when she starts school, you can go to work at least part time to help out. As the second poster said, going BK will not change your earning situation, but if you play it right, you can change it yourself and not fall back on the old default of poverty.

[TooBrokeToJoke]

Well, you're going to need to figure out something other than "I can't". $10.50/hr will doom you to poverty even if you file for bk today. The debt isn't the problem right now. Lack of income is your most pressing issue. So what if you get letters and phone calls and lawsuits. There is just nothing to take.
You really need to talk with your folks and see if the child can stay with them while you work nights at WalMart or Target,etc.

Well, for now I AM staying with my parents, but it's just a matter of time before they ask me to leave. They are being very supportive, and offering help where they can, even with helping by getting the bank to sell them my house, I mean, how many parents would do that? But they are not in a financial situation where I feel comfortable in letting them take that risk for me. I can't let them take the fall for my mistakes. They have offered to watch my daughter when they can, allowing me to take a paper route, only pays $150 a month, less if you count what I pay to run it... and I have hit a breaking point. I realize $10.50 will get us nowhere, but he was only being offered $12.50 at a warehouse job... and thats where he's spent the last 10 years working, so he had a ton of experience. He wants to go into computers, and have a desk job, and while I want to be supportive, I sometimes feel like he doesn't understand just how little $10.50 really is. He wants to hurry and get an apartment before we file, but they already said they'd take in a bankruptcy, as long as we give a double first payment.

I am sorry you are going through this. But in a way - it is fortunate that your husband chose Texas rather than another state because in Texas, creditors cannot garnish your paycheck and also, Texas is a very friendly debtor state.

Is there any way at all that you can move down there to be with your husband? Where is he living? Does he have his own place?

I agree with other posters - you both have to improve your financial situation. If you think you and your husband could build a life in Texas, you can walk away from your house & take the time to get settled, prepare for bk - just make sure to try to pay student loans in the meantime because those debts cannot be discharged. Even if you have to work nights while your husband works days - but at least you will be together as a family unit.

And yeah - doesn't matter if creditors are calling - you guys have nothing to take.

I would LOVE t be with my husband right now, but I can't. If I do, then if I want to work I HAVE to have a babysitter. He has no real schedule, meaning I can't have any sort of schedule, because it's likely they will run into each other often.

So if I stop paying my credit cards and on my house, can't they sue me? What can I do to make sure that the problem fades with or works with the bankruptcy, rather than getting much worse! I don't think I'll have a problem making the attorney see we have BIG problems ahead, but can he do anything for me now, even before the creditors are after me?

[TooBrokeToJoke]

Yes, ITT and on line schools are way more expensive than community colleges, and you get the same education. Once the CC bills and car situation is taken care of, your money will go farther. Try to get some school yourself. Nursing or something (X-Ray techs make pretty good money). If you lack in science or math, tackle it now. With a child it will take a few years longer, but then when she starts school, you can go to work at least part time to help out. As the second poster said, going BK will not change your earning situation, but if you play it right, you can change it yourself and not fall back on the old default of poverty.

I'm not exactly ready for any kind of medical field. I don't have the stomach, nor the patience...for patients. I can't be around sick people or anything, I have a very weak stomach. I originally went to college to be a childcare administrator, but left soon after learning that top pay was no more than $12.00. And this was about 5 years ago that I went, and then, I wanted something in my life that paid more, but I work well with children, and jobs with children don't pay well.

I don't know what else I could go to college for, I always wanted to go for Web Design and Online Computer Networking, but a lot of things got in the way of that, then we realized that ITT is basically a sca and a rip-off, and we just don't have the means for me to go to college. I don't qualify for any loans or grants, I tried about 5-6 months ago. They wouldn't help me.

I realize that we are still going to be in trouble, but I just hope it won't kill us. I'm hoping with the $400 in monthly cc bills and the $700 on our house will help. I thank you all so much for your advice and help.

[justplaintired]

I believe Bk will be the answer to some of your problems. Filing on this trailer is probably a good idea right along with the CC.

I don't know if your DH is renting where he is at, but your probably better off to go where is he and find a place to rent and walk away from the trailer.

The biggest problem right now is you need some sort of employment to help pay some of your necessities. Groceries, utilities... One person working at $10.50 an hour to support of family of three just isn't enough.

In the state I am in we have a program to help people with a lower income with child care. You need to look into something like that for your child, or work nights and see if Grandma and Grandpa won't keep her. Even if it's part time, anything right now. Without more income, even filing Bk won't solve your problems.

Believe me I know how hard it is to leave a little one to go to work. We had to do it. But without my income along with my DH we couldn't survive. So if you want to get turned around your best bet is find a way to leave the little one and get some sort of job. That or find other children to watch and increase your income that way. You definitely need more income.

Good luck!

[rrockinggramma]

ok, I think you need to take a deep breath. I would go be with my husband in that small apartment in TX. Then I would walk to that mall and find a job. Many have day care centers where they will watch your child while you work. Look for one of those. Let it all go in Michigan and don't worry about it. Then after 6 months in TX find a BK attorney and file on all the Michigan stuff left behind and begin anew.

Once you are organized and both working in TX, then have your hubby find a LOCAL community college and get him going on those computer classes. Many are online and can be done at any time of day.

GL

[TooBrokeToJoke]

ok, I think you need to take a deep breath. I would go be with my husband in that small apartment in TX. Then I would walk to that mall and find a job. Many have day care centers where they will watch your child while you work. Look for one of those. Let it all go in Michigan and don't worry about it. Then after 6 months in TX find a BK attorney and file on all the Michigan stuff left behind and begin anew.

Once you are organized and both working in TX, then have your hubby find a LOCAL community college and get him going on those computer classes. Many are online and can be done at any time of day.

GL

So... stop paying on the house and cc's then? Can I do all my court stuff in Texas for Michigan? And, I believe I read in Texas that you can't file seperately if you are married... I would really like to not kill my credit as well. Most of the stuff IS probably my fault, but, it's all in his name. I'm going to my attorney in about 30 min to ask what he thinks I should do, do you think he would advise me to walk away?

Thanks.

[athomas]

I think you will feel a lot better once you talk to the attorney. They will be better able to advise you on what is best. I tend to agree that you will be much better of if your family is together. You will get it figured out!

[Cali]

I think the OP needs to get out of the "I can't" mentality and start thinking of things that will help with the situation. When you have a child you have to figure out how to survive, even if you don't like that job.

Your original post didn't state you were staying with your parents, so if that is the case why are you still paying on the trailer? You can take that money and make it a little easier for you.

You can get state help because you are in need. Low income families do get help for daycare.

Moving to TX would not be a bad idea.

[bmcmull]

I would check to see which state has more friendly bk laws Michigan or Texas. Have you husband file the ch 7 in Texas. Stay with your parents until you can afford a cashcar and move to Texas with your husband. Let the trailor go and the car, and make it your priority to reunite your family in Texas. If you have no debt except rent and utilities you can still make it on 2k month, not in luxury but together. Your fall isnt far, it may seem like it but its not, you will have plenty of time to make it good (your only 24). Also look to your local churches, they have great things for strugling families like your.

[TooBrokeToJoke]

i talked to the attorney, just one of them free consults, and he told me to stop paying on the trailer, the rent and the insurance for that, and to stop paying all credit cards. that leaves us with the car, the insurance on that, and then our student loans (which we wont have to start paying till september).

he was especially concerned about the 10.50 an hour part asking how we planned to survive... and i just told him, when i can be with my husband again, i'll do what it takes. e is checking out assistance for daycare and food stamps there, i have to come up with the lawyers money so he can start filing... he said it should take 5 months from start to finish... i hope thats right. i have to stay here to handle everything, i won't have to file for bk, so that will save my credit so we can get an apt, and he will have to come up here for the 341 meeting. after it has been discharged i can move to texas knowing we've got a chance to make it better.

i am still looking for work, i was paying on the house only because i wanted to have enough time to get my stuff out, i have to get it out now because my house payment is already a little late...not much, but i am such a worry-wart and i can't stan the thought of them auctioning off my things inside.

when we moved into the trailer park we were told we had to leave all appliances behind when we sell. well my attorney told me to sell the appliances and get the money... i am sure he knows what hes talking about... but that sorta freaks me out, i don't know why. i am already in as much trouble as i can get in, i really shouldn't let this stuff get to me anymore, but i am an overly sensitive person.

[justplaintired]

Not sure about selling the appliances, that one worries me a little bit. Perhaps you should look into another free consultation, just to be sure you have chosen the right attorney, see what another attorney says about selling the appliances. Something about that just doesn't sit well with me, something to do with selling things before filing, I believe you have to account for all that.

Don't worry about getting out that quickly. Start packing, but don't be too worried about getting out that quickly, I believe they will have to go threw forecloser even if it is a trailer. Again, get another consultation, don't pay until you've met with a few attorneys. See what they say about a time frame to get out. If nothing else, move stuff to storage when the time comes, it will be alot cheaper then rent and stay with Mom and Dad until you get the money saved to go live in Texas.

I know the idea of not paying is scary, but it won't be so bad. I worried about that so much and honestly it went alright. Do you have a phone the can even call you on? If so, once you have found the right attorney forward all calls to him. Seriously the really can't do anything to you that quickly, you have time. Don't over stress yourself. Find any kind of job that you can. Work at Walmart if you have too. Get some sort of low income child care, most are good and have to follow state regulations running the day care so your much safer using this type of childcare anyway, maybe even an apt based on your income.

Things will work out, but please you need to meet with more then one attorney. Find one who makes you comfortable, one who seems to know all the ins and outs. Selling anything before filing seems like bad advice.

[TooBrokeToJoke]

well, what i got from it was to do this once i've filed... when i file, i will lose the house, so thats why he said i should sell them, so that i can afford to move to texas to be with my husband when this is all over.

i am going to call some more attorneys this week, either tuesday or thursday. and get a few more consults.

thanks 4 all ur advice.