Filed 13 in Dec and now getting divorced. What do I need to do?

[busbis]

Well this weekend, I thought that our financial problems were our biggest problem, but unfortunately not. My husband and I have decided to divorce this weekend but I really don't know how to go about this. We just filed for 13 in December and had our 341 on 1/8. Our confirmation isn't until 2/21, but I am wanting to keep the house, and he is wanting to move out and get an apartment. I'm not even sure if he will be able to find something.

My question is how do we go about our 13 now. If he was to move into an apartment, then we can not afford our monthly payment set by our court. Do we amend and file seperately (can you even do this) or do we stay together on the bk13 and modify for any changes. He has to move out, because I just found out about his girlfriend and I will not have him living under the same roof as me. Please help. I feel like my life is falling apart.

[kiddles]

Get yourself a very good divorce attorney, and let him consult with you rBK attorney.

[rrockinggramma]

wow. I have walked in your shoes. We filed a chapter 13 twice and it dismissed for non payment. My now ex wasn't too supportive so it was a constant battle. He announced one day that we were getting divorced "for financial reasons" lolol anyway, I let the second bk dismiss and then filed on my own. Of course our divorce was easy, no kids, second marriage for us both, and by the time we divorced we had no assets left. We had 1 car which he took and that was repo'd soon after the divorce was final. I haven't looked back and you shouldn't either. I would be in your attorney's office asking for advice. But the questions you need to ask are 1: can I afford this house on my own? 2. Where am I at financially? You might qualify for a chapter 7 after the divorce. Hang in there. Life will get better (my first hubby left me for another after 22 years)

[FreshLikeADaisy]

Busbis, I have no advice for you here, only wanted to say that I wish you all the best and you will be in my unworthy prayers. That, and I'm glad for your sake he's out, out, out. Take good care of yourself and good luck!!!

[JollyGG]

I think you need to dismiss the bankruptcy, file for divorce, refile on your own.

Would you qualify for a chapter 7 on your own?

Get the divorce done first. Then you can get a great new start without hubby and without debt.

[busbis]

I am over the median for a 7, he wouldn't be. So I'm affraid if I dismiss the case I'm stuck paying for everything and he gets away clear. I am surrendering 2 condos and possibly a def balance. My intial plan was to pay off my whole bk in 6 months (which is before the foreclosure sale occurs) and hopefully this will take care of things. If I dismiss, I could be responsible soley for any def balance plus our cc's. That's why I thought maybe if we got through this would the court be ok in amending our budget if he moves out and take his apartment rent into consideration. I just don't know what else to do. I haven't spoken to any divorce atty yet (I think I'm still in denial about it all and still haven't even told our kids and just ashamed of it all). Maybe I should just let it dismiss, but I'm trying to look out for me, not him.

[JollyGG]

I haven't spoken to any divorce atty yet (I think I'm still in denial about it all and still haven't even told our kids and just ashamed of it all).

He strayed not you. You have nothing to be ashamed about. Yes, it takes two to make or break a marriage. But it also takes honesty, commitment, and fidelity to make things work. Having a girlfriend on the side shows that he wasn't willing or able to put any one of those three things into your relationship. Kick his butt out of the house and go see the divorce lawyer.

[woeisme]

Basically, this just sucks for you. He's a jacka$$. But unfortunately, he can have the CH 13 dismissed whether you want it to or not, and once you are legally separated, he can file CH 7, nothing you can do about it if he doesn't agree to go along with it (the 13). You can try to get the CH 13 changed to reflect a legal separation (you need to get a lawyer ASAP to get paperwork for that tho) and the changes in income, but again, if jacka$$ doesn't go along with the 13, there's not much you can do about it, and you're going to be stuck with the payments anyhow, so you might as well detangle yourself from him first then re-file, rather than praying for 5 years he doesn't do anything to screw up your joint CH 13. Can you call your BK lawyer for advice? If you were just now filing a CH 13, and planned to pay it off in 6 months, I'm not sure I even understand the financial situation, so you're going to need someone who knows what is going on with your case to help.

[toomuch]

Busbis, I can't offer any advice, but I do wish you peace.

Toomuch

[Ortgeist]

I'm sorry about your situation. I hope you are taking care of yourself.