Just Needing to Vent

[SecondChanceGal]

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[Granny]

SecondChanceGal,

I can sympathize with you. Divorce is hard even if there is sufficient income. Bankruptcy is hard, no matter what, but to put the two of them together has to be almost unbearable.

And I know you hurt for your daughter to be abandoned by her dad. It's a difficult situation to explain to her. I had to do the same for my daughters when their dad pulled some of the same stuff. I kept my opinions of him to me self and never bad mouthed him in front of the girls, knowing that someday, they would form their own opinions....and they did, they saw him for what he was.

I just wanted to let you know I feel your pain. Take the time for the pity party, it is well deserved. Then tomorrow, go for a long walk outside in the fresh air, knowing that this time next year, most, if not all of this, will be behind you.

I am pulling for you that you make it through this coming out smelling like a rose.

[goingout]

Your daughter will be ok. The thing she needs the most is your love and she’s got that. I had to buy a lot of my own things at that age. I knew a lot of kids who did. It was probably good for us. Just know that things will get better. You are not worthless. Don’t even think that.

[copperarab]

Hi secondchancegirl... I understand 110% where you are at! I am 42 yrs old raising a 4 yr old granddaughter and am filing for divorce, then bankruptcy.....

I am looking forward to my divorce. I will be EXTREMELY poor afterwards, but lonely? nahhhh.. loneliness is when you live with a man for 18 yrs and you are not allowed to have friends, hobbies out of the home, etc! I may be poor afterwards, but between meeting people at church, AA groups, and the playground, I am bound to finally find a friend after all these years!

I am also not upset about my bankruptcy. It is a necessary solution to the mess I am in. It will hurt me a lot to see all my credit-building hard work go down the drain, but I have vowed not to lose one wink of sleep over it.

I have had those days girl... but they are from a horrid marriage to an alcoholic abusive man and TONS of debt. Freedom is just a few months away.

Hang in there. Have a talk with your daughter, she needs your love and understanding far more than material things. Do you have an upscale consignment shop nearby? It is actually good that your daughter is working some, all 3 of my girls started working when they were 15 yrs old... all 3 also bought their own cars when they were 16/17.

Take a nice walk, go to a park, look for outside concerts in your area (free), go to a local coffee house, sit, drink and relax. Find a local church, get involved with families that have it worse than you! Heck, volunteer once or twice a month at an animal shelter or homeless shelter/soup kitchen!

Good luck with whatever you do, it WILL get better, no guilt, ok??

Hugs

~Lisa

[leftyf]

Good source for helping with panic/anxiety and no medicine required. You may know about it already...put it on a credit card a few months back ($140.00.) It has actually helped with my panic. It has not lowered my debt levels though...
Just in case it can help...

http://www.panic-anxiety.com/

[qwertysue]

Hi!

Also check out this program:

RxAssist can help you learn about ways to use pharmaceutical company programs and other resources to help reduce your medication costs. Look at our database and frequently asked questions to get started.

http://www.rxassist.org/patients/default.cfm

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There is a trend amongst pharmaceutical companies to provide such assistance. If you post the mfr of the ones you are on, I can possibly steer you in other directions as well.

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[DivorceRuinedMe]

I am so sorry you are feeling so down. My divorce is the reason I'm here as well. 35K in legal fees fighting a man that wouldn't give up till I clobbered him. It's over now, I'm even remarried (see - there is a light at the end of the tunnel) and I have to file for BK but you know what - I am surviving and I'm not worried anymore. And I will get through this. I will. And so will you! Hang in there! And know you are not alone and that you can always come here to vent. We are here for you!

[Minnymouth]

We're All here for one reason or another, but we're all in the same "financial boat"....
and it's really great to have a good support system to lean on through the process....

Yep, your not alone, a lot of people are right here with you......

[spell]

Chill out. Pretend you're BK has already been discharged. Live cash only for a little while.
Sounds like you're already doing it. Separate the wants from the needs. I'm pretty sure your daughter has clothes. I'm also pretty sure that she sees your financial situation and doesn't expect gifts.

Only once you're sure you're not accumulating more debt should you file.