What To Say Or Not To Say, Tis The Question?

[maxwellv8670]

I have looked over this forum and I am much more stressed out under the collections forum than I was the bankruptcy forum. I haven't got my first collection call yet but I know it is coming. I have no idea on what to say or not to say to these people. I had this vision of answering their calls and even giving them my cell phone number because I want to be up front with these people and I don't want to dodge the bullet so to speak. I may very well be filing BK next year. I don't know. But it seems like there is so many things that you should and shouldn't say that I don't know what to say. Please help me if you can. Should I tell them I may be filing BK?

I am unemployed and have been since August.
I have 3 credit cards. (2) BOA and (1) Citicard.

[flyinbroke]

I hear Citi is a bear to work with...one lawyer I met with said that the few dispute cases (non BK) he loses are involving Citi. Citi has been good to me thus far, so I have continued paying as I plot the next move.

BoA started calling within 2 weeks of my overdue payment. I told BoA I am not sure when I can pay them as I lost pay (not quite true, but no raise on the horizon) and everything costwise has gone up from utilities to rent to insurance (absolutely true.) Since this just happened today, I will keep posting. They offered a payment plan but it was not much cheaper month to month; they also offered a debt management plan which I turned down flat. They asked me to touch base and keep them abreast of my situation. Of course I won't; I only answered so they know the number is a good one.

I have read a few boards and playing the BK card is risky. I think you can buy a few months by playing the unemployed and broke card. Some of the more seasoned members will definitely have more insight than I do on that subject.

[maxwellv8670]

Thanks for your input! Is it easier to just file BK? I am about 21K in debt. I haven't been in this situation before. First time for everything.

[AngelinaCatHub]

Maxwell:

First of all, say as little as possible. State that things have been a bit short at this time. Depending on your intention to file, don't tell them you are going to as it could trigger a fast suit.

As long as you can hold them off in honesty, do so.

Once you file, you have protection. They cannot do anything. Don't let them find your employment number if you are able to do this.

Understand, (since our election and before) you are not alone. Decide what and how you wish to proceed. Please read and educate yourself with all our 'stickies' on each forum.

Get the book from Nolo press, nolopress.com for about 17 bucks download pdf, and read it.

Best I can do for now. 'Hub

[maxwellv8670]

Thank you so much Angelina! I am unemployed will they try calling my previous employer? I am trying to prevent that as I don't want my previous employer to know about how hard I have it. That was the willingness to give them my cell number. If I answer their calls they shouldn't call there, should they? After reading some of the threads I take it I am not suppose to commit to anything?

[frogger]

You need to quit worrying about what other people think and do what is best for you. You're still in the stage of trying to pretend that everything is all right. But don't worry.... you'll get over that soon enough when the screws get tightened up.

Get your own house in order and don't worry about what the neighbors or your previous employer thinks. They don't walk in your shoes or pay your bills.

Do what is best for you and yours.

[flyinbroke]

Frogger has a point. It is easy to worry about what others think but are the neighbors or the banks putting food on your table? Most people in this economy are in survival mode, if they are smart. The not so smart ones pay CCs before rent and food because they are too worried about what FICO thinks of them.

Not making the first payments was actually the most gut wrenching part so far....by and large most of us would love to honor our commitments but it is hard to honor a contract that is so one sided, lopsided and certainly not in your favor. The initial collectors are nice, but they are not looking out for you. I did give some info that can be construed as ammo, but wanted to see what would be offered. I wasn't impressed. But now they know they have the real number and won't likely bother people they dig up on US Search.

CEOs do this all the time. It is a business decision. Think of yourself as CEO of your own life/company and it is easier to deal with.

[PacificBlue]

My wife wanted to play the serious card to these calls. I wanted to play the smartass card. (I won) But, there maybe a fast reaction to my way from them but I really don't care. They can't eat me, and protection is a phone call away. (our lawyer, not retained until we start getting notices of suit).

My wife wanted to take it serious and let them know that my cancer treatments are costing to much, and cry a little. Sure, that might have better the choice as it lets them know the real situation... but since they are the ones that put us in this situation.. (rate hikes, lower limits, tripling our monthly payments, trashing our credit).. They can kiss my %&#!

[flyinbroke]

I picked the middle road. Serious with a dash of smartass. They won't give a #*$^ about my dog needing surgery, my car needing expensive routine maintenance or the fact that they have wiped out 10K worth of credit line and sent scores into a death spiral preventing me from asking for help elsewhere. I doubt crying would help. I am unlikely to answer future calls from the first bank since they know the number is legit from talking to me. Will have to take one from the robodialers at GE so they know too.

I also looked up our civil court system....I noticed that back in 2003-2004 BoA aggressively sue for CC debt; this year has solely been evictions though. GE sues and almost always loses if you show up; most of their wins were by default.

[AngelinaCatHub]

I picked the middle road. Serious with a dash of smartass. They won't give a #*$^ about my dog needing surgery, my car needing expensive routine maintenance or the fact that they have wiped out 10K worth of credit line and sent scores into a death spiral preventing me from asking for help elsewhere. I doubt crying would help. I am unlikely to answer future calls from the first bank since they know the number is legit from talking to me. Will have to take one from the robodialers at GE so they know too.

I also looked up our civil court system....I noticed that back in 2003-2004 BoA aggressively sue for CC debt; this year has solely been evictions though. GE sues and almost always loses if you show up; most of their wins were by default.

I like your attitude and theory. Also Froggers. Give them nothing, not even a care. Who cares about FICO anymore? FICO won't get you a mortgage now days, and after bk, you will be flooded with CC offers. All high interest low balance. Cash is king and you become subservient to the lender. I will never become an indentured servant again. 'Hub

[frogger]

Cash is king and you become subservient to the lender. I will never become an indentured servant again. 'Hub

Here ye, here ye! One of the best statements that you will ever here.

I agree 'Hub. NEVER AGAIN

And by the way, I haven't even had my 341 and Orchid Bank has already sent me an application. I'm still laughing......

[flyinbroke]

Here ye, here ye! One of the best statements that you will ever here.

I agree 'Hub. NEVER AGAIN

And by the way, I haven't even had my 341 and Orchid Bank has already sent me an application. I'm still laughing......

Every time I applied for prime cards I got rejected because I am maxed out (thanks to the banks. I haven't used several of these cards in years) I would get both First notPremier and Torchard Bank offers. I laugh and send them to the shredder. I had not even defaulted and they waited with bated breath.

[Adrift]

Max-
I have had relative success in talking to the creditors when they call. I did have BOA call my work # one day. I answered the phone, but did not give my name. I took a message- mainly b/c I wanted to know what they would say if anyone else had answered. It was generic about a "business matter". Anyway, I waited until that night and sure enough, they called the house, and I simply asked them not to call me at work, it was against policy. They noted it, and I have not been bothered since. I have almost always answered the phone when they call, I simply tell them that I cannot commit to a payment at this time, I want to pay my bills, but I have other priorties like food and rent. Most have been very nice, I had one lady from BOA show her a$$-which was fun, and I had one guy from chase (whom i could barely understand) call me about 2 hours after another chase rep had called and start badgering me with the same questions- I had fun with that. Southern drawl and middle eastern/indian accents do not compliment each other lol. Basically- I try and talk with them just to keep them from ringing the phone off the hook, and to control when I talk with them. I tell them- call me again on Tuesday b/t 6 and 8 PM. That way, I am prepared, calls go smoothly and I actually get the same person again. They have already started trying to make settlement deals (which is what I'm looking for) and I'm not even 60 days out yet.

[Bell30656]

I did care about my reputation in this small town and didn't want the word on the streets that I was bankrupt. Some like Frogger can say not to worry about what other think but this could have been a major set back in my career and personal life. No disrespect to those of that belief but I couldn't do it that way and there are others that can't as well. If you do it right, it can be a very discreet process especially if the court is in another town.

Never, never tell the collection folks anything. Just tell them that right now you don't want to discuss the matter. They will protest and demand you talk about it, but stick to your mantra. "At the present time I am not willing to discuss my financial situation with you. Please have a nice day."

Do NOT worry about what they say afterward. If they say they will sue you, that you will be arrested, that they will call you mother-in-law, whatever. Simply tell them that they have reached you and that you will not talk about it right now. Then bid them a good day and hang up. They are all bluffs. Sure, they can sue you but so what. It takes quite a while for a lawsuit to run the courts and you will have filed by then. We don't have debtor's prison in the USA (At least not yet.)

No need for games, tricks or sticking your head in the sand. If you answer the calls they can't start calling anywhere else in "attempts to locate" you. They cannot make you talk about it. Telling a creditor that you plan to file bankruptcy could as a previous poster suggested cause the creditor to file a quick civil suit in an attempt to get a judgment and seize something before you can get the funds to pay your lawyer and filing fees.

[PacificBlue]

No need for games, tricks or sticking your head in the sand. If you answer the calls they can't start calling anywhere else in "attempts to locate" you.

You mean they aren't suppose to.