top Ad Widget

Collapse

Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

It really does get better... a 14-months later update

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    It really does get better... a 14-months later update

    I finally bit the bullet and filed CH7 in August '09... after years of denial, scraping, praying, wishful thinking, sleepless nights, making silent deals with God, working 7 days a week and even emptying my 401K in an effort to keep those precious minimum payments paid on time... trying to stave off what was inevitable anyway.

    I was 60 years old, had been laid off from my "secure" government job several months earlier, hadn't taken a vacation, been to a restaurant or gone to a movie in what seemed like years. (I couldn't possibly do that! Every penny I could get my hands on had to go to keeping those ridiculous-rate credit cards current because I was so afraid of what would happen if I fell behind.) I even came home from the hospital the day my mother died and instead of immediately calling relatives to tell them of her death, I first called my credit card companies to make over-the-phone payments so I wouldn't be late. Good Lord.

    My life had turned into one big Whack-A-Mole game... played out in secret because I was so ashamed of myself for getting into such a mess. I couldn't find a job, I was depressed as hell and, more than anything else, I was utterly exhausted from running for so long and getting nowhere.

    Then the mallet finally... blessedly... broke. I woke up one morning, knew I just couldn't do it anymore, called a lawyer and that was it. I filed a few weeks later.

    Wish I could tell you that I made all the right moves and the bankruptcy went smoothly. It didn't. I didn't do any homework or pre-planning before I filed (don't try that at home), ended up having to fire my lawyer, get another one, attend two 341 meetings and lose out on most of a personal injury settlement because of bad filing timing... but man oh man, it all turned out to be worth it in the end.

    It's now been 14 months since I filed, 10 months since I was discharged. I can sleep nights, I've lost 50 pounds and, after a year of unemployment, I was finally able to get another job... paying a bit more than my previous one. I only work 5 days a week now, I'm rapidly building a healthy emergency fund, contributing to my 401K... and I've even been to a few movies. Best of all, I'm not harboring any "shameful" secrets anymore. My friends and my employer all know about the bankruptcy and accept me anyway.

    I'll never be able to afford to retire, of course, and will be working till the day I die... but even that prospect feels better than life before bankruptcy did. Heck, I may even get a second job at Chucky Cheese as a Whack-A-Mole coach. God knows, I have enough experience at it.

    #2
    This is awesome, happy to hear you are doing so well after BK. I am in the early stages and so thankful to have found this place as I plan to file early December. Scared, but hopeful. Thank you for sharing

    Comment


      #3
      I just filed, and love that you shared your inspiring story. You just gave me the boost I needed. I'm so happy things are going so well for you!

      Comment


        #4
        ForTheBest, please read this thread. Seems like we are kindred spirits. I've been there and you have been where I was. http://www.bkforum.com/showthread.ph...1&posted=1#top

        'Hub
        If I knew it all, would I be here?? Hang in there = Retained attorney 8-06, Filed 12-28-07, Discharge 8-13-08, Finally CLOSED 11-3-09, 3-31-10 AP Dismissed, Informed by incompetent lawyer of CLOSED status, October 14, 2010.

        Comment


          #5
          ForTheBest, thank you for sharing your story. I have been applying for govt. jobs thinking if I could land one of these it would be like finding the golden egg, but I so happy that you shared your story. I too will be working till the day I drop and I'm ok with that.
          Chapter 7 filed 11/4/10 ---- 341 Meeting 12/1/10 ---- Discharge 1/31/2011.

          Comment


            #6
            First of all, congratulations on making it through to the "other side", and thank you for sharing your story. I absolutely LOVE the Whack-a-Mole analogy! It's inspiring to read a positive story from someone who's been there, done that. I, for one, really appreciate it.

            ....and if you get a job at Chuck E. Cheese, can you put in a good word for me? I could work scraping the bottom of the barrel, I'm good at that
            Filed pro se, made it through the 341, discharged, Closed!!!

            Comment


              #7
              Forthebest - I guess you have lived the meaning of, "This too shall pass". Your story is truly inspiring.

              Please don't think you'll "never have" enough money to retire...you have NO idea what unexpected income life may have in store for you. You have so much rich life experience and have something that most of us young folks haven't fully developed yet -- wisdom. That certainly is worth something.
              Filed Pro Se Ch. 7 on 7/7/10 341 Meeting 8/19/10
              Last Day for Objections 10/18/10 Discharged to a Fresh New Start 11/1/10

              Comment


                #8
                I'm so glad that your life is better now. I understand how it feels to lose your retirement income and start over. Best wishes to you-your life will continue to get better from here on out.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Such inspiration... hopefully I can be saying the same thing in just under a year!!!

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Thanks so much for your replies.

                    Jlynn275... It will turn out to be the best Christmas present you ever gave yourself. I promise. I also promise that the scared part before filing is the scariest it gets. I was scared before my 341's, but nothing like before I filed. And I hated the waiting time between the last 341 and discharge, but at least I was breathing. Spent a lot of time NOT doing that before I filed.

                    Panacea... I love your name and the empathy in your posts. Your reply definitely gave me a boost, too.

                    'Hub... I've followed your story for a long time (even visited your musical website), and yours and Angelina's posts talked me down off the fear ledge more than once last year. Now I just hope you won't hate me for getting a credit card. I'll have to apply for senior housing next year and the administrator told me I'll need a better FICO score to get in! Next they'll tell me I need one to die. Jeez.

                    Fallonedward... Keep applying for those federal jobs. I was very disappointed to lose mine, but after a year of applying for tons of jobs in both the private and public sector, it was a federal agency that finally hired me. God bless 'em for taking me on at 61. Nobody else would. I don't particularly care for the job but I'm grateful to have it. And heck, if I have to work till I drop, at least they'll give me free flu shots till I do!

                    Free2breathe... Too funny! Not sure I'll even get in now, though. Not being able to spell Chuck E. Cheese may have killed my chances.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Thanks for telling your inspiring story about the after-life of bk. It's always great to hear that life does go on and fantastically so!
                      Filed Ch. 7 on 9/30/10---341 11/12/10---Report of No Distribution 11/16/10

                      Discharged 1/21/11 Closed 1/26/11

                      Comment


                        #12
                        freedomnow7... Thank you for reminding me not to stop believing in possibilities. I think you're the one with the wisdom. And congratulations on your discharge!

                        neverending... I just read your story before reading your reply here. Yikes, you've been through the mill, haven't you? So glad it's almost over for you. Here's hoping the retirement income gods smile down on both of us.

                        help1234... You will, I'm sure of it!

                        Comment


                          #13
                          mommi2many... Wow, your 341 is coming up this week, so by this time next year you'll be posting YOUR life-after-bankruptcy story. Here's to a great 2011!

                          Comment


                            #14
                            ForTheBest I am in my late 40"s and I figure the federal govt. is my best shot at securing employment. Dang I just wish each application didn't take over 2 + hours to complete and submit. I wish I had a manual on "How to apply to Federal Jobs", LOL

                            Thank you so much for your encouragement, I know that your life will be so much better then it was going forward. Much success to you

                            Originally posted by ForTheBest View Post
                            Thanks so much for your replies.

                            Jlynn275... It will turn out to be the best Christmas present you ever gave yourself. I promise. I also promise that the scared part before filing is the scariest it gets. I was scared before my 341's, but nothing like before I filed. And I hated the waiting time between the last 341 and discharge, but at least I was breathing. Spent a lot of time NOT doing that before I filed.

                            Panacea... I love your name and the empathy in your posts. Your reply definitely gave me a boost, too.

                            'Hub... I've followed your story for a long time (even visited your musical website), and yours and Angelina's posts talked me down off the fear ledge more than once last year. Now I just hope you won't hate me for getting a credit card. I'll have to apply for senior housing next year and the administrator told me I'll need a better FICO score to get in! Next they'll tell me I need one to die. Jeez.

                            Fallonedward... Keep applying for those federal jobs. I was very disappointed to lose mine, but after a year of applying for tons of jobs in both the private and public sector, it was a federal agency that finally hired me. God bless 'em for taking me on at 61. Nobody else would. I don't particularly care for the job but I'm grateful to have it. And heck, if I have to work till I drop, at least they'll give me free flu shots till I do!

                            Free2breathe... Too funny! Not sure I'll even get in now, though. Not being able to spell Chuck E. Cheese may have killed my chances.
                            Chapter 7 filed 11/4/10 ---- 341 Meeting 12/1/10 ---- Discharge 1/31/2011.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Thank you for sharing your story. I'm on Day 74 of the 60-Day club and trying to be patient, so it's really helpful to hear from others who have stuck with it and come out the other side. Best wishes for your new life!
                              DH laid off 3/08 | Last mortgage payment 12/09 | Filed Ch13 5/10 | Converted to Ch7 7/10 | 341 held 8/10 | AP filed by secured creditor 10/10 | Ch7 discharged & closed 11/10 | Foreclosure 10/2011

                              Comment

                              bottom Ad Widget

                              Collapse
                              Working...
                              X