A Banner Day (with mixed feelings)

[pathfinders]

Tom in Col,

Could have not said it better, we had over 150K in CC debt, was like a crushing Vice, when Income want way down Business really suffered , Burned through savings, ( while living on the CC's) In the 3 years we alone we had paid over 40K just in interest and none toward principle. Should have done it long ago. Did you know that CC company pay colleges Millions of dollars just to be able to go on campus to lure students to sign up, they know if the kids fall behind the parent are going to make the payments. It is a bean counter thing, they know based on the Models that 6% to 8% will default. and the CC companies still make huge profits. Do not feel bad the CC companies expect people to file BK.

[researchnerd]

I was allways looking to be served again and or people coming by our home( Mortgage company to take pictures of your home to make sure it was not trashed,) ( I had fun when the person would pull up in there car and take pictures of the house and I was in the window looking at them , that's for a different thread)

Sounds like a great opportunity for mooning!

[McMark]

Sounds like a great opportunity for mooning!

LOL!

We haven't had our 341 yet, its set for the 8th so still a little nervous about that, but I am looking forward to the discharge date, even though we have to leave this building we currently call home.

Like others, I do not feel shame, it was a business decision, and one that should have been made years ago. Over the past 5 years, every penny we brought in went to bills and the CC's, which in turn we had to charge on to keep going. It was a vicious circle, and we really didn't get anything extra above and beyond regular expenses. Yet here we are, deeper in than we were 5 years ago. It seems it is easy to not see what prices are when you pay all your income to CC's, then use them to pay for the regular living expenses. When we quit using the cards and actually started using cas for things like gas and groceries, I was completely shocked at how much more it costs than it did before we began using credit.

So...congrats on the discharge! Here's to a new beginning, armed with the knowledge to keep us from making Wall St any richer from our hard work in the future.

[BKFOURAB]

I had BK in 1990 (due to medical reasons) & again in 2009 (due to job losses). One "wonders" the whole time of the proceedings, that's why you hire an attorney, so yu won't worry "quite" as much. I tell people to surrender most everything. Why? because, it is hard to give up your stuff! It's yours! or so your brain says. But it is wanting to own all those "things" that got you in a pickle.

[lfllffl]

Thanks everybody... I know it wasn't personal to the bank, even tho they didn't fight my bk, I fought it and beat myself up. I just never thought I'd end up here...ya know?

I'm still trying to adjust to life without credit, tho it is getting easier. I feel good about being so close to the end of the year. I can take a few baby steps between now and Jan 1, and I've got a whole new set of financial resolutions for the new year!

Funny - this year, I wont be resolving to pay down my debt!!! now if I could just figure out this 20 lbs....

[msm859]

I'm early into this, just retained an attorney, but I can tell you that shame is one thing that has never crossed my mind. Remember this is 2010 not 1940. You're not walking away from money owed to poor gus who runs the bakery, you're walking away from money owed to an autonomous machine of a financial institution who made the business decision to extend you credit and assume that risk. It's just business to them, it should be just business to you.

You really do have to take the emotion out of it and remember it is a business decision. No one blinks when a business goes bk. It is the Banks who want to lay the guilt on you (notice all the increase of FICO commercials) because they want you to spend every last dime, all your savings, 401k etc. and then when that is done and you have nothing they will not be there to help you out. How many people have had their credit card interest raised despite never having been late? Once I took the emotion out of the equation deciding to file for BK was easy. Government is bought and paid for so unless we help ourselves no one else will.

[AngelinaCatHub]

i had bk in 1990 (due to medical reasons) & again in 2009 (due to job losses). One "wonders" the whole time of the proceedings, that's why you hire an attorney, so yu won't worry "quite" as much. I tell people to surrender most everything. Why? Because, it is hard to give up your stuff! It's yours! Or so your brain says. But it is wanting to own all those "things" that got you in a pickle.

EXACTLY!!

Ooops sorry did I say that?

We live on 266 acres of family land on the river. We were so well off and in estate planning we wished to give this to our Public and never to be "improved" as it is natural Florida Hammock. We have no progeny in our line and my daughters of a prior marriage are not in this or do they need it. Our worth on paper exceeded ten million dollars. We did what we wanted as it took no less than 10 years to find the right entity to make our land a Public Park. As it is and will be. We have life estate and life rights. And then a millionaire enemy of mine attacked us for nine years. He ruined us as our liquid assets and retirement went towards lawyers and then due to health problems we lost the rest. Fortunately due to the time line, we preserved our land with right of use to our deaths. It was never a factor in our bk.

Now with that bit of History, here is what we have learned. Being people who did not do without and could write a check for any car we wished, or a hundred dollars for a person to help them without worry, we now are scrimping into SS month by month.

The big part of the lesson is: Whatever we had, or wished we could get. What we needed we had. NOW, those things we wished, were junk. I see the same on the side of the roads when new stuff comes about. What we need, God provides. What we lost is NOTHING, what we gained are new values. When we gave a check for a hundred bucks to a person, that person needed a hundred bucks next month. What we learned is for no money at all, we can help people here. We do this. Not only for them but, selfishly for our own pleasure. Not only that, it costs us NOTHING, but our time and love.

Would we go back in time and change anything? Maybe, but probably not. Our bankruptcy has taught us more than a college education could. Our value system has become "down to earth".

Those I see, cry babying about their credit rating and what they have lost, I just cannot address. For the grace of God we saved our house, but for other people not for us. We cannot sell it and it will be Public land when we die. If we had not saved our estate we would still make it as "survivors" and we believe in whatever state you find yourself, you must make the best of it. It is an every day decision to cope with the problems presented daily.

That is my take on the whole "WONDERFUL" bk experience. I don't like bk, but once you realize it it necessary, it is a wonderful NEW START if you will take that start seriously.

My take and opinion. 'Hub

[btbeme]

Hey, the cost of lending money is calculated into the...cost of lending money. This is called "interest."

Now, the Trustee is charged with the duty to ensure that your filing is honest and valid. Neither they nor the court pass judgement on "how or why" you filed. In fact, the how and why is left entirely up to you. So, don't be so hard on yourself.

I have always felt that the issue of guilt stems from the prospect that you might make the same bad decisions a second time. A CH 7 is not a Get Out Of Jail Free card - you pay mightily for the discharge of debt. The most difficult part is staying out of trouble afterwards. And that takes discipline.

Morality? That may differ with each person, but I personally feel that it is a better moral decision to be able to provide for my family and retirement via a second chance provided by a CH 7 discharge. Shame on me if I cannot fulfill that second chance expectation. Some of our friends have been very judgmental; however, I know that they are draining their IRAs and 401(k) accounts to try to keep up with mounting debts. In some cases, they are cutting their own throats. And nobody is prohibiting you from repaying your debts - a discharge simply removes the legal requirement to do so.

Screw guilt. Just take every measure of caution that you do not put yourself back into this position. Forgiveness is divine. Thank God the USA has BK laws that don't require imprisonment or removal of a limb. Many countries do.

[telco95]

AlmostAmos, keep us posted on what happens with Ford. I will keep everyone posted on what happens with my ride through.

Thanks for the replies, the OP and I have similar feelings about this, it's good to hear positive posts on this. I know it will get better, it's still hard not to feel a little vulnerable. Time will heal!