And the hits just keep coming

[willisurvive]

Thanks tobee,

It's not even so much about the physical house anymore. I do love our house, but it's more about protecting the kiddos from things they shouldn't have to worry about at this age.

We don't want them to worry about not having a place to live and so forth. As for my daughter, what we do over the next few months will be something she has to deal with while going through high school and that makes some things a little tougher.

I'm glad you have things in perspective. I'm getting there, but we haven't found a place to rent yet that is practical for us. I dont want to make a bad situation worse by moving into a house half the size, knowing that we will be miserable. If we could get into a smaller house for half the monthly payment, we might have to make it work. It has to be worth it. However, if we are paying rent in the amount of our mortgage payment, we might as well have room to breathe.

[tobee43]

i understand downsizing is difficult...we went from 4000 sq feet to a car....

now we have 2 rooms in a house....but i totally understand your concerns about your children. but i want to tell you something about that...

when my kids were about 12 and 13...our house burnt down....we sent them away for about 2 weeks with their grandparents and searched high and low for a place. we went into the burnt house and took out of each of their rooms what survived....cleaned up the terrible smoke smell...brought them two really cool bedroom linen sets and filled each room with familiar surroundings.

well when we took them over to the place we had to rent, they LOVED it....new rooms with new items. we didn't use much money and the place we found was actually bigger than our house at the time... (we had purchased a 1500 sq ft house but within the 33 years expanded it to just a bit over 4000 sq ft), nice and roomy with a wonderful layout. it can be done..i'm certain you will find something nice. it may not have the special things you use to have...but it is the truth that "home is where the heart is".

u may be surprised about your oldest...she may feel helpless...give her assignments by asking her input to help with the younger ones and how she would think they would best make the transition...it makes or helps her feel more in control of her own fate....she's a young lady...not really a child, yet still needs you so much...(actually, that will never stop in your lifetime, they are always our babies). but include her!

[Fallonedward]

Thanks tobee,

It's not even so much about the physical house anymore. I do love our house, but it's more about protecting the kiddos from things they shouldn't have to worry about at this age.

We don't want them to worry about not having a place to live and so forth. As for my daughter, what we do over the next few months will be something she has to deal with while going through high school and that makes some things a little tougher.

I'm glad you have things in perspective. I'm getting there, but we haven't found a place to rent yet that is practical for us. I dont want to make a bad situation worse by moving into a house half the size, knowing that we will be miserable. If we could get into a smaller house for half the monthly payment, we might have to make it work. It has to be worth it. However, if we are paying rent in the amount of our mortgage payment, we might as well have room to breathe.

This is similar to what I'm going thru. My son is in 10th grade in high school. We have moved him once already and we can not find a home to rent or even an apartment to rent that is less then what we are paying in our school district.

He is now under doctors care and having a very rough time of it. Our doctor suggested that we keep him in the same school for the rest of his high school years or this might be the final thing that push's him over the edge.

So in my case I will do whatever I have to stay in our home or find something in our district for him

[tobee43]

willi...i stand by what i said. as a parent, children feed off of us...good and bad. if we keep up a good face, and keep up with the positive it helps them.

of course, some children are more sensitive then others and will be affected differently. however, as they look up to us for guidance and love, we need to do our best to put on our best game face on...whether we feel that or not, and make the transition as easy as possible for them.

hope you son is doing better.

[Fallonedward]

willi...i stand by what i said. as a parent, children feed off of us...good and bad. if we keep up a good face, and keep up with the positive it helps them.

of course, some children are more sensitive then others and will be affected differently. however, as they look up to us for guidance and love, we need to do our best to put on our best game face on...whether we feel that or not, and make the transition as easy as possible for them.

hope you son is doing better.

We have been putting on our game face but this is the 4th tragedy this young man has had to go thru in the last 17 months. The doctor told us that no matter how positive we are/were their is only so much a teenager can take.

thank you for your kind words

[tobee43]

fallon, i so understand and wish you and yours the best for the future!

[willisurvive]

Thank you again for sharing your stories. It does help - really it does.

I have been putting on my game face, but they know that something isn't right. I'm just worried that in the end, no matter how hard I try to make it easier on them there might not be anything I can do about it. If we have to move into another school district, etc. It just may be that it's the way it is.

I am putting my trust and faith in God that no matter what, I want to be where we are supposed to be - same school district or not. Life lessons stink sometimes and most of the time, we are better off for the things we have experienced. I can also understand when enough is enough already too!

It's nice to know that there are so many people that have faced the same questions and fears and have come out on the other side. I'm looking forward to the day, when I can come here and comfort someone who is just beginning this journey.

~M

[tobee43]

it will come...and guess what TIME IS FREE!!! LOL!!

hugs to you and yours....