I guess my main question is can I really bite the bullet and pay this heap off (60K): i dont see how a few hundred dollars a month is going to do it. I am not sure how the diff between cellphones or not, one car or not, is the diff between bk or credit counseling, or 13. Its just such a small dent.
The other question is whether a brand new car is a risk: i am afraid of risk. So, is it really true that a used car is a better idea? I am more than 6 months out from filing.
I should also say that I have a couple other expenses that probably seem like luxuries but I cant live without them:
1. I need to fly my family of 4 coast to coast once a year for Xmas with my aging parents
2. every couple years I have to do research overseas for my job for at least 2-4 months at a time, and I have to pay to bring my family with me: I cant bear to be separate from them for so long.
I know that these huge expenses wreak havoc with my debt paying ability, but I just cant alter these things. Family comes first its just not negotiable. I will happily go to debtors prison as long as my family comes with me! (that doesnt sound the way I meant it!)
Thanks so much and I do appreciate the words of caution from the moderator and others. To tell you the truth I do not know what the hell I am doing. I am confused and frightened. I also have no realistic idea about my actual expenses or where the money is going. If I did, I probably would not have gotten into this mess. I feel stupid now, but honestly I did not even know how much I owed until recently. I didnt know how much i made either. I just totally ignored everything.
My main thing is I am afraid that my old cars will break down and I have no transportation to work post-bk, that g-d forbid my wife died how could i pay anyone to watch the kids while i work (my job is super-full time), and there are also plenty of things that are apparently normal expenses that we do without in our failing attempt to pay back credit cards. might as well roll those normal expenses in.
i was just kidding sort of about the dog. my girl wants one and if it works... well anyway i am religiuous and would not let harm befall any creature just to balance my accounts. sorry for the bad joke!
As i increasingly look into this it looks like i can get under ok, but i want to go as far under as possible because i am a worrier and just want to feel like its a slam dunk. So i want to maximize but not in an unethical way or especially not in a way that raises eyebrows. Also this is just a forum so I figure I should push a little and see where the push back shows up: that way I can get a feel for the whole situation. So thanks so much for pushing back! Thats what i really need.
Any further advice is super appreciated.
The other question is whether a brand new car is a risk: i am afraid of risk. So, is it really true that a used car is a better idea? I am more than 6 months out from filing.
I should also say that I have a couple other expenses that probably seem like luxuries but I cant live without them:
1. I need to fly my family of 4 coast to coast once a year for Xmas with my aging parents
2. every couple years I have to do research overseas for my job for at least 2-4 months at a time, and I have to pay to bring my family with me: I cant bear to be separate from them for so long.
I know that these huge expenses wreak havoc with my debt paying ability, but I just cant alter these things. Family comes first its just not negotiable. I will happily go to debtors prison as long as my family comes with me! (that doesnt sound the way I meant it!)
Thanks so much and I do appreciate the words of caution from the moderator and others. To tell you the truth I do not know what the hell I am doing. I am confused and frightened. I also have no realistic idea about my actual expenses or where the money is going. If I did, I probably would not have gotten into this mess. I feel stupid now, but honestly I did not even know how much I owed until recently. I didnt know how much i made either. I just totally ignored everything.
My main thing is I am afraid that my old cars will break down and I have no transportation to work post-bk, that g-d forbid my wife died how could i pay anyone to watch the kids while i work (my job is super-full time), and there are also plenty of things that are apparently normal expenses that we do without in our failing attempt to pay back credit cards. might as well roll those normal expenses in.
i was just kidding sort of about the dog. my girl wants one and if it works... well anyway i am religiuous and would not let harm befall any creature just to balance my accounts. sorry for the bad joke!
As i increasingly look into this it looks like i can get under ok, but i want to go as far under as possible because i am a worrier and just want to feel like its a slam dunk. So i want to maximize but not in an unethical way or especially not in a way that raises eyebrows. Also this is just a forum so I figure I should push a little and see where the push back shows up: that way I can get a feel for the whole situation. So thanks so much for pushing back! Thats what i really need.
Any further advice is super appreciated.
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