Loaned a friend $1200 for college

[Penny Less]

I didn't really plan on this one, even last year, I really REALLY tried. And I really don't want to do 2 of course. But sooner or later I'll get sick and then even if I recover 100%, even if its just a few weeks down, I'm ruined.

I've never been able to keep a job past the downtime of having flair ups. I've had doctors tell me I should get married if I want any sort of security (I'm a women) and the sad part is it's probably true at least in the USA.

I am just so frustrated right now, I'm so glad to be feeling better, that's the main thing, but I'm just so pissed off. I actually care a great deal about my finances now, I'm going to be 30 soon, and I would like to be able to buy a house and have some small investments and real actual savings without worrying about judgements, etc. I really want to have a good financial future. I've stopped using credit cards - it was my new years resolution last year. I've been able to keep a budget for over a year, I've really worked at managing my money. But it still doesn't seem real - I'm still keeping things out of my bank account, still following advice on this forum, still waiting for the creditors.

So yeah I need to plug the insurance hole, I honestly don't know how I'm going to do it but it's my #1 priority right now.

I just can't shake this really depressing crappy image of myself at 40, having got it together financially, and then having it all ruined by some health bill. Life isn't fair and nobody can know what will happen but I really really want to get it together.

So we'll see, I'll let you guys know how Canada works out. :-)

[music12]

maybe some of your planning, when you look for a job, is looking up the laws of the different states and finding a job where there is universal health insurance. massaschusetts is one state that has that, and there are programs that would help cover the insurance costs for the out-of-work or indigent. you would have to look it up and see if you qualify.

it sounds like your condition is really interfering with your work. does that not qualify you for some kind of disability insurance?

also, i know you feel like time is flying being almost 30, but remember that when you are 40 you'll think you were really young at 30, so try to think of yourself as young. easier said than done - i know, i'm in the same boat...

[Penny Less]

Yeah I actually qualified for medically indigent? in my area in California - basically it's like a free pass to hospitals and the clinics in them.

The only downside is its a really crappy life - you have to make so very little that financial planning, etc, is totally of out of the picture. If you have enough money for a bankruptcy I think that would ruin it. I have done this route during a particuarlly long downtime. As long as I'm able to walk & talk I want to try at having a life outside of this.

I've looked at Washington and Mass and I'm actually saving up for visits there to see how I do. I don't have any friends who live there so it's a little more $$ and planning. Right now I live on a California coast with a friend - the clean slightly salty air really helps with the allergies. Most of my allergies are to mold, smog, some industrial pollutants, oddball office stuff like microwave popcorn, ammonia, and anything I seem to be prescribed lately.

I am trying really hard not to regret my 20's - I was even more healthy then - I even kept a skilled job for an entire year and 2 months when I was 26! If I had made sure I had group and not private insurance then I wouldn't be needing these forums.

[music12]

did you know about cobra after your year+2 months? you can keep the insurance for 18 months after being laid off, though you have to pay for it. these days the cobra payments are covered up to 80% (i think) by the stimulus package.

wow! that's a lot of allergies. i should remind myself to be grateful for being, knock on wood, totally healthy.

[Penny Less]

That year and 2 month job never offered group insurance. It was for a small company who was a little more tolerant of the week long absenses every other month or so.

I actually wish I had never worked for them as it was in a bad area for me (I didn't know this at the time) and increased the # of things I'm sensitive to. But it's kind of a point of pride too - it was proof that I could actually keep a job over a year. I have the good college degree, the "american life success kit" and all that LOL. So I always felt like a failure til I realized that unless I'm 100% healthy I'm not geared to succeed in our society. I guess that's what turning 30 gets me, that insight.

[music12]

i've also got the american life success kit. just not a job at the moment.