Ever feel guilty?

[ssdsco]

I feel like I robbed a bank....BoA, Citi, HSBC for over $200k.

[Dirk Squarejaw]

If it was simply my debt and poor spending that got me to this point, I would feel worse about what I am doing. Although I did have poor spending habits, I had my finances under control from 2005-early 2007. I traded down in cars and started paying off other debt and my credit score hovered between 700-740. I was doing fine, IMHO.

Fast forward to Feb 2007 and my wife at the time met a man at her new job that promised her the world. We split up and I ended up with most of our secured debt and a good amount of unsecured debt in the divorce. I started living off of my credit cards to make ends meet and fell into a financial downward spiral which lead to my bankruptcy.

She spent 6-8 months of her life getting beaten to a pulp by Mr. Wonderful, lost all of "our" friends, was put under heavy watch (and stress) at her job due to her relationship and has been in therapy for about 6 months. The other day she called me after I had filed asking me to sign a release on the title of her car that I had co-signed on so that she could trade it in. My lawyer said "DO NOT SIGN" so now she is stuck with the car that she drove to work during a snow emergency to see Mr. Wonderful and wrecked. Its never been right since it was fixed.

She probably won't like the outcome of this bankruptcy either.

Karma's a *****……and no I don't feel a bit guilty about it. She put me in a major financial bind and this is my "Get out of Jail Free"-card.

[No Gravy]

LOL....Ya know, I don't blame her because we *did* owe her the money, plain and simple. I can't fault her for that. What I DO fault her on is the nasty 4 page letter. Just because we owed her money doesn't give her the right to "talk smack" about us, KWIM?

Yeah, that's the part I would have taken exception to, also. They play games like that in my family, too. It's called "I'll give you the money, but that means I have the right to treat you like dirt."

I refuse to play any more

Ah well, it's over with now and now we don't speak. Perfect for me.

See? A silver lining!

[Gabriel_S]

I'm going through the filing process now and not a second goes by that I don't feel guilty. BK isn't an easy thing, at least for my soul. There are some creditors like most of my credit cards that have screwed me up the ######, those I couldn't care less about, but there are many that I wish I could have paid for.

[b_girl]

I'm going through the filing process now and not a second goes by that I don't feel guilty. BK isn't an easy thing, at least for my soul. There are some creditors like most of my credit cards that have screwed me up the ######, those I couldn't care less about, but there are many that I wish I could have paid for.

I think we all live with that kind of guilt, because none of us takes bankruptcy lightly. We all intended to re-pay our lenders, it just became impossible. Don't let the guilt consume you, enjoy your fresh start and use it wisely.

[turnedleaf]

1.) Do you have money saved for potential layoff--say 6 months to a year's worth of family living expenses?

2.) Have you got money saved to pay for a year's worth of health insurance, in the even that you guys lose your insurance coverage. Individually purchased insurance is much higher than insurance received through employment. (This would be in addition to #1.)

3.) Have you got adequate long-term disability insurance, in case you or your family member gets injured on the job in a serious way and can't work for years?

4.) Have you got a half million or more in your 401K plan? Depending on what age you retire, your standard of living and how long you live, we could easily "need" $2 million or in our 401K's to have a really secure retirement. You there yet?.

DH is a career military officer. Unless he does something stupid enough to get himself KICKED OUT of the military, numbers 1,2 and 3 are set. With injury, illness, accident, we are fine. If he was killed, I would never need to work again. Sadly, in todays military climate, they make sure that families are protected that way.

If he got out today, he would get $2500 a month just in retirement pay, in addition to healthcare and all other military benefits. We do not have 500,000 in 401K, but our retirement is funded. Then again, its a long way off.

I totally understand that there are always ways to do better, and be better. But I am not delusional about being "OK" either. We are OK.

[pmed8]

Guilty?

Nope not for a single second.


Guilty about not feeling Guilty............................................


Pmed8