How Do You Guys Handle This, I Can't Take It

[bkadv]

Hang in there! We had everything under the sun (seems like) happen to us because we filed bk. (Case just closed after 1.5 years). Even had a member leave our church because we filed...figure that one out!! So sorry that you have to endure this. All will be well in the end, and you will be a much stronger person.

I told myself throughout that after all we've been through, what else can even begin faze us??

[alh]

Thought this might be interesting here for some reason



If you're feeling alone or depressed because of financial problems, cheer up! You're in good company. Below is a list of some of the famous people who have filed for bankruptcy or had severe financial problems before the modern bankruptcy code was adopted. Please note that most of these folks had their great success and fame after their bankruptcies.

Donald Trump, financier
Michael Jackson, singer
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, composer
Elton John, singer/composer
Kim Bassinger, actress
Mike Tyson, boxer
Mark Twain, humorist
Burt Reynolds, actor
Thomas Jefferson, patriot and president
Gary Coleman, child actor
MC Hammer, rap singer
Willie Nelson, country singer
Lorraine Bracco, "The Soprano's" actress
Charles Goodyear, inventor of vulcanized rubber
PT Barnum, circus promoter
Frank Baum, author of "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz"
Mathew Brady, Civil War photographer
Oscar Wilde, playwright
Jerry Lee Lewis, rock singer
Rembrandt, painter
Henry Heinz, ketchup magnate
Milton Hershey, chocolate magnate
Henry Ford, auto magnate
Johnny Unitas, football player
Wayne Newton, entertainer
Mickey Rooney, actor
Debbie Reynolds, actress
John Connally, former Texas governor
Walt Disney, creator of Mickey Mouse
Mick Fleetwood, rock singer
Merle Haggard, country singer
Ulysses S. Grant, president and Civil War general
Dorothy Hamill, figure skater
Larry King, talk show host
Bowie Kuhn, former baseball commissioner
Stan Lee, comic book creator of "Spider Man"

[freshstart06]

now have tears because you guys are the best. it is just scary and I have to stop feeling like a failure. Some people may say that my husband should find another job or work two but that is easier then said because I can't move around the house like I use to for now I need the help, With four young kids, my oldest is 13 but she can do so much. It is just too much debt and with the pending lawsuit, it is just too much. A second job will not bring the money in fast enough.

Once this is over, I will feel much better. I know someone is going through much worse but it just gets scary when I need to purchase my insulin and I don't have to money to do it. My insulin is my life, thankfully that only happens once or twice and I have a check book (wink)

[familyof7]

I know what you are going through with the purchase of meds it is really heart breaking to not be able to afford it there are some drug manufacturers that offer assistance with that go to google and type in financial assisatnce for medications or go to the website for the manufacturer of the insullin I have 240.00 per month medications and they would cover them all but my problem is I cant afford to go to the dr. to get a prescription LOL but i know there is some help out there for that but I am not sure if it is a nation wide thing or a state thing but worth looking into.I will keep you in my prayers.

[freshstart06]

The problem is that my husband makes too much "gross" income it is the income that we never see that makes it hard for us to be approved of certain meds.

Well my landlord gave us a 5 day notice today just now, it is 7:30pm here. I don't know what to do because after we file he can still just evict us under the new law. Hmmm.... I will have to pray over this tonite

[JRScott]

I hope everything turns out for the better.

Don't give up.

You might talk to your own lawyer about it, it might gain you some more time not sure. My landlord knows of my bankruptcy but he is all paid up. He's not had any problems with it.

Sorry you are having so much trouble with yours.

[freshstart06]

He seemed like a nice guy but I guess he has to look out for himself. My life is like a soap opera right now, it will be interesting to see how all of this turns out, I regret telling him but I wanted to be upfront. Well, at least I have enough money to find another home and security deposit since the rent in the area has gone down.

[JRScott]

In a way perhaps it is a blessing. If rent is cheaper now in your area you might can get another lease at a cheaper rate which should help you.

I'm not sure the laws where you are but usually evictions take 30 days. So if he gave you 5 days before he starts the proceedings you should have another month.

I'd include the back rent in the bankruptcy even if you have to amend your filing. If he's going to have you evicted you have nothing to lose by doing so.

I'll keep you in my prayers.

[alh]

What does the 5 day notice say. Usually those say something to the effect of you have 5 days to pay or eviction procedings will start. You said you tried to pay him, correct. When is your lease up?

[freshstart06]

We had a two year lease because we were going to considering purchasing the home depending on the market. We already finished one year and now had 9 months to go. There is no way we were going to purchase the home in 9 months because the market is pretty bad and our financial problems.

We decided to just let is all go and look for another home. I will just add the rent to the chapter 7. I still may help him find another renter just because. I will talk to him. I am not upset with him,he did what he had to do just like I am doing what is best for my family. I still don't understand why he gave us all that money back then gave us a 5 day??? Weird.

[freshstart06]

JTScott, you are correct it could be a blessing because the night before he gave us back the money, I prayed so hard. We only had $250 left to our name. I needed money to file and pay the paralegal on top of groceries and the electric bill. My husbands does not get paid until next week.

I asked God for extra money, I told him, I don't know how you are going to pull this one off but I believe you will. I asked for wisdom and a sign to let me know we are heading the right direction with our decision. Blah, Blah...

The next day, I checked my bank statement online just to see how bad things were and we had all that money in the bank, I thought I was in the wrong bank acoount. It took me a while to realize he gave back all that money. I still don't understand why he would give all the money back to us then give us a 5 day then ask for it back. It wasn't like we just gave it to hime he had all but $500 for a 1 /1/2 and then we gave him $500 the day before he sent it all back. Of course we took all the money back, because I don't know what is pending in my account and we will need that money to move.

Another blessing is that I have to move a single level due to the weak bones in my feet. My doctor wrote a statement. I was going back and forth rather to just finish out the lease knowing I can't walk up the stair without possible damage. It was hard running a family of young kids without being able to run up and down stairs. So I guess God made the decision for me.

I decided to forward the letter to my landlord from my doctor so at least he knows that I HAD to move do to medical reasons and just move on and not look back.

I feel a little better today but that varies. ONce the BK is filed I will feel better.

[familyof7]

Just move and file it in the bk if you cant move in 5 days he will have to go to the courts to evict which will give you 1 to 4 more weeks so just put the money owed on the bk and move knowing you will owe nothing. God Bless

[DeadManCrawling]

First, take a very long deep breath and look around you. I will answer this as best I can tomorrow (Sunday). But understand one thing-No matter WHAT happens, and no matter HOW it happened that you came here, you are a vital part of our world. And your family's world. There is light on the horizon and the very fact that you are here shows you are looking for it. And likely have found it.

I posted this a few months back to someone who was as devastated as I was and we all, probably were at some point.

Remember, you owe yourself and your family. You do NOT owe the creditors a damn thing, except money, which is an invention of mankind. Does God mention money anywhere in Genesis? I don't think so. WE made that up, and to behave as though CITI or CHASE is spouting the word of our Lord (or anyone's Lord) would be blasphemy in itself.

http://bkforum.com/showthread.php?p=89200#post89200

Will write more tomorrow, like anyone needs to hear more of my foolishness.

Best wishes,

-dmc

[CindyLou]

He gave you the rent back because once a landlord begins the eviction process it is STOPPED by law even if he recieves a penny from you for the rent. Acceptance of rent is an understood continuation of the existing lease. In my opinion, he is reserving his option to evict you. Why don't you reserve the option of staying till her gets the eviction judgement, move to another place, then file bk and include the landlord in your bk.

[chpxiii]

He gave you the rent back because once a landlord begins the eviction process it is STOPPED by law even if he recieves a penny from you for the rent. Acceptance of rent is an understood continuation of the existing lease. In my opinion, he is reserving his option to evict you. Why don't you reserve the option of staying till her gets the eviction judgement, move to another place, then file bk and include the landlord in your bk.

Yes. I agree with this. Bankruptcy is a business decision. Just like your landlord is taking measures to protect himself and making a business decision, so should you, freshstart06.

I don't entirely agree that we don't owe creditors anything, we do. We owe money, which we borrowed. For either things, or to pay medical. (Let's not go into the healthcare situation of this country. It infuriates me! My boyfriend was diagnosed with M.S. He has to make sure he doesn't make that much money so he can stay on the assistance program for his meds. How f'd up is THAT?)

At anyrate...life happens and sometimes we can't pay back what we owe. And so we have the relief of bankruptcy for honest debtors.

Just like your landlord is making a business decision (as hard as it may be on a *personal* level, and I know you feel it on a personal level, freshstart06), it's all just business. And if that's the case, like cindylynnsmith said, excercise your option to move and get what you owe put on the chpt. 7 you're filing.

Remember: this is *business.* As much as it might hurt for him to do what he's doing "to you," he's not doing it to *you* per se, he'd have done it to anyone in the same situation. He has to look out for himself. So I urge you to look out for YOURSELF and do what you need to do.

I know this is such an aweful feeling. I was going through some paperwork last night and I saw aaaaaaaallllllllll the collection notices I was receiving from 2003 - back when I filed for my chapter 13. For the last couple of years (I'm on a 5 year plan) I had been thinking about maybe I should never have filed, it was a mistake based on well meaning advice from an AA sponsor...I would get depressed thinking about it and what it will now take to rebuild my credit. I will be 39 this fall. I have never owned a home, I have no retirement, and now I have a chapter 13 on my credit report. I felt so stupid and like such a failure ... always getting started late in life.

But when I saw all those collection notices...all those Western Union receipts to wire money so they don't repossess my car... I was taken back to that time. The severe depression I was in due to being unable to find a job, trying to keep my car so I *COULD* find a job, living in wretched apartments, having my 2 cats give me some sense of sanity, and just being all out whacked out.

No wonder I couldn't find a job. I was so stressed, depressed, suicidal...people could pick up on that.

Once I filed chpt. 13, my finances were organized into one payment and were made considerably smaller per month that I knew a retail job would be able to take care of rent, food, utilities, and the trustee, I was able to relax. I was able to emotionally and mentally calm down. I could just sit down and be. And the phone stopped ringing. Which helped my physical environment as well. Things started to look up for me. And they're getting better all the time.

Remember, freshstart06, this is a business decision. You're not a failure. Businesses and companies file bankruptcy all the time, (although they're probably not as severely penalized in their credit or credit report as a private person), and they lay people off all the time in the name of business. You're not a failure. This bankruptcy will come as a relief for you. A chance to take a breather and collect yourself, your family, and give you a chance to start over again. Just keep reminding yourself of that.

It's just business. There's nothing personal in business.

xoxo
chpxiii