Wow, with the forum down for a day (or two?) I missed it! Coming here and reading has been so helpful. I'm glad to see things back up and running!
Thanks to all who've been here and helped me figure some things out. I can't tell you how much I appreciate the advice & support.
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Our first late/missed payment EVER will be tomorrow, and I've felt quite a bit of anxiety about that. There are times when I want to jump on their website and make a payment. But Lady's words keep ringing back to me:
"You say you want to start making good financial decisions. Now is the time to start. Cashing your children's life insurance policies and using their savings doesn't sound like a good financial decision when you know you will file BK and are still making payments on credit cards."
So true. All that would do is delay the inevitable. I know, I know I would just wish that we could have that money back at some point.
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We still have not decided on an attorney. The one we met with who is very close to home has some pros & cons. The one who is ~an hour away seems to just have pros. I had an appointment scheduled to sign a contract and pay the fee with the local guy on Monday, but I woke up with a moment of clarity this morning, and my gut is telling me to wait. I think we really wanted him to be "the one" because he is so close to home. But when I go over some things in my head, I'm just not sure that it's the best choice.
I went back and read through the reviews for the other attorney (the one we saw in January, I believe) and people just seem so happy with him. When we were there, he was alone in his office, and I believe he does all of his own work. Everyone talks about how easy he was to communicate with, how he was there every step of the way, etc. We had a good visit with him, and I think when the time comes, I will contact him again and proceed from there.
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We decided to borrow from the kids' life insurance policies instead of cashing them in.
We still need to find a vehicle for our son to spend his money on. He is turning 16 soon. This will be covered under our exemptions.
We are obviously not using the credit cards at all anymore.
We finally closed the checking account with the bank we have a credit card with. The only thing that makes me a little worried about this is that we no longer have a "brick and mortar" bank. All of our accounts are with Capital One online now. (No, we don't have any balances with Capital One.)
My husband finally got a new cell phone, which I have been telling him he needed to do before our credit took a turn for the worse. We reduced our data and everyone is using the wi-fi when we're at home, so the effect on our bill was negligible.
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Things still up in the air:
Last night, I realized my husband is still considering having back surgery with the Laser Spine Institute. That would be a big chunk of money, so if he's going to do it -- it needs to be soon!
I'm still not sure how it is going to work out for me to pay for nursing school. I am relying at this point on what I have been told: We should be able to get federal student loans because they do not base their decisions on your credit. Another option is a hardship withdrawal from his 401k, but I'm still not sure how that whole process works -- if we'd be able to use it for one semester, or the entire time. My very last option is that my grandmother has said she will give me the money. But she is 90 years old, and I really don't want to do that. I'm also not sure that we could do that with a bankruptcy in process. I have wondered if it would be okay if her payments went directly to the school, and never touched my hands. I don't know.
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It now looks like we should be able to file in July. That would make the 341 meeting just BEFORE I start nursing school, which has been a big concern for me -- having to miss classes in the very beginning, and having no control over it whatsoever.
The local attorney said we would "offer" half of next year's tax return and half of any annual bonus received (if any) because we'd be halfway through the year when we file. He said the trustee would "keep the case open" until those things were paid to them (next spring). I'm not sure what the other guy will say about this. It would be great if this didn't have to happen -- but apparently, it probably will.
Thanks to all who've been here and helped me figure some things out. I can't tell you how much I appreciate the advice & support.
---
Our first late/missed payment EVER will be tomorrow, and I've felt quite a bit of anxiety about that. There are times when I want to jump on their website and make a payment. But Lady's words keep ringing back to me:
"You say you want to start making good financial decisions. Now is the time to start. Cashing your children's life insurance policies and using their savings doesn't sound like a good financial decision when you know you will file BK and are still making payments on credit cards."
So true. All that would do is delay the inevitable. I know, I know I would just wish that we could have that money back at some point.
---
We still have not decided on an attorney. The one we met with who is very close to home has some pros & cons. The one who is ~an hour away seems to just have pros. I had an appointment scheduled to sign a contract and pay the fee with the local guy on Monday, but I woke up with a moment of clarity this morning, and my gut is telling me to wait. I think we really wanted him to be "the one" because he is so close to home. But when I go over some things in my head, I'm just not sure that it's the best choice.
I went back and read through the reviews for the other attorney (the one we saw in January, I believe) and people just seem so happy with him. When we were there, he was alone in his office, and I believe he does all of his own work. Everyone talks about how easy he was to communicate with, how he was there every step of the way, etc. We had a good visit with him, and I think when the time comes, I will contact him again and proceed from there.
---
We decided to borrow from the kids' life insurance policies instead of cashing them in.
We still need to find a vehicle for our son to spend his money on. He is turning 16 soon. This will be covered under our exemptions.
We are obviously not using the credit cards at all anymore.
We finally closed the checking account with the bank we have a credit card with. The only thing that makes me a little worried about this is that we no longer have a "brick and mortar" bank. All of our accounts are with Capital One online now. (No, we don't have any balances with Capital One.)
My husband finally got a new cell phone, which I have been telling him he needed to do before our credit took a turn for the worse. We reduced our data and everyone is using the wi-fi when we're at home, so the effect on our bill was negligible.
---
Things still up in the air:
Last night, I realized my husband is still considering having back surgery with the Laser Spine Institute. That would be a big chunk of money, so if he's going to do it -- it needs to be soon!
I'm still not sure how it is going to work out for me to pay for nursing school. I am relying at this point on what I have been told: We should be able to get federal student loans because they do not base their decisions on your credit. Another option is a hardship withdrawal from his 401k, but I'm still not sure how that whole process works -- if we'd be able to use it for one semester, or the entire time. My very last option is that my grandmother has said she will give me the money. But she is 90 years old, and I really don't want to do that. I'm also not sure that we could do that with a bankruptcy in process. I have wondered if it would be okay if her payments went directly to the school, and never touched my hands. I don't know.
---
It now looks like we should be able to file in July. That would make the 341 meeting just BEFORE I start nursing school, which has been a big concern for me -- having to miss classes in the very beginning, and having no control over it whatsoever.
The local attorney said we would "offer" half of next year's tax return and half of any annual bonus received (if any) because we'd be halfway through the year when we file. He said the trustee would "keep the case open" until those things were paid to them (next spring). I'm not sure what the other guy will say about this. It would be great if this didn't have to happen -- but apparently, it probably will.
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