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So much anxiety. Scared. Depressed

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    #16
    LEOinblue, you haven't gotten on anybody's nerves. You are welcome to continue to post here and we are happy to give you information and moral support.
    LadyInTheRed is in the black!
    Filed Chap 13 April 2010. Discharged May 2015.
    $143,000 in debt discharged for $36,500, including attorneys fees. Money well spent!

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      #17
      Leo. I'm sorry for the pain you're in.
      It's easy to let your anxiety/worrying get the better of you.
      It sounds like you've had a number of painful events happen recently, including losing a child at birth; did I read that right ?
      Having a bankruptcy, on top of these other loses, is really a lot to deal with.
      Can you think about the future instead of the past ? You need to grieve for the loses you've had, but it's important not to fall
      into a depression. There's a difference between healthy grieving and depression. Depression is self blaming, grieving is just feeling
      the loss without blaming yourself.
      I filed for bankruptcy 3 1/2 years ago. I was very depressed and self blaming. I was really ashamed of my "failure".
      Since then I've raised my credit rating to 740 (which is where it was before the BK), bought a house and have no mortgage, I live
      within my means, and I now have a new beginning.
      Try to focus on how to succeed rather than how you've failed. Learn from your mistakes, and move on with your life. You're going to be fine.
      It sounds like you've done a lot of things right and well in the past.
      Make a list of what you've succeeded at, focus on repeating those successes, think about how you can repeat them.
      Make a list of your failures. Think of what you can learn from those supposed failures. Then burn that list but keep the things to be learned from it.
      You're going to be fine. It's just going to be scary and maybe a little painful for just a little while, and then everything will be good again. It's clear you know how to succeed, you will succeed again.
      Dennis

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        #18
        Originally posted by LEOinblue View Post
        I've been labeled a loser for filing for BK.
        I've had a few folks call me a "loser". I simply respond that I figured out how to use the bankruptcy laws to put myself about $135K forward financially (i.e., relative to my situation had I taken the advice of some of my creditors and cashed out my 401K/IRAs to be "honorable", and therefore consider myself to be a true winner, who fought by the system's rules and came out ahead. It seems that a certain high political candidate also feels himself to be winner by successfully navigating BK.

        As for feelings of depression, I didn't have them, but I could see how some folks don't understand how nasty & brutish society is and thus feel a huge sense of unease upon it destroying their station in life. I was, however, anxious that the BK would not go through properly, and yes, once the 60 days after the 341 meeting had passed, I felt much happier.
        Last edited by joshuagraham; 08-01-2016, 05:16 PM.

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