Divorce

[lsutton1974]

My husband and I filed at the end of July, he has now decided he can't deal with life or something like that. Can I take him off the Bankruptcy? Also, what about his truck, it is in both of our names, but I don't want to have to pay for it. Can I leave it off? I hate to pay for all of it while he gets off scott free. Any suggestion? I do have a call into my attorney's office but since it is Labor Day weekend I won't know anytiime soon.

[lrprn]

So sorry to hear your husband is trying to take the easy way out for himself, lsutton. A question first will help us give you a better answer....are you two going to stay together in the same house and stay married?

I'm sure you didn't need any more stress at the moment - please remember that we are here for you any time you need support. Hang in there!

[lsutton1974]

No he has already moved out. He moved on Tuesday. We have 4 children and one the way. We filed 7 in 2001 so I am unable to do that. We have two vehicles in both our names. I would like to keep mine on the plan but remove his even though my name is on it.

[Minnymouth]

I don't mean to sound "mean" BUT - if his way of solving problems is SPLIT AND RUN....... let him pay the freight on his way out.......

Make sure in the divorce that you have a car, child support, medical coverage on your children thru his insurance, your share of his 401K plan or joint savings plan, and THAT HE GETS HIS SHARE OF THE BILLS TO PAY IN FULL - for his desire for FREEDOM.....

Since you cannot file a Chapter 7 again and I understand that you have filed a Chapter 13, you will need to contact your attorney, explain the situation, and possibly have a meeting with the Trustee to see where you go from here.

Right now - sit down - do a budget/expense of what you both owe together..... then do one that would only involve your future expense/income.... and see where you stand...

Decide if you have assets, (home, car, savings, 401K etc.) If property and assets are too be divided up in the divorce, see NOW what will be yours and what will be his...... then you will have a clearer view of what your real assets are going to be and this will help you decide what you need to do.

At the present time and the circumstances as they are right now, if he should "cop-out" leaving you with all the payments if you divorce, then it could cause your case to be dismissed quickly.... and leave you in a terrible situation financially.

And I sincerely suggest that you personally sit down with an attorney that is a bankruptcy attorney that works with divorce cases, or possible divorce cases. They are about the only ones that could really handle your case in depth.... Do not take your soon-to-be-exspouse with you..... This meeting should be to determine your rights and see what options are open to you and what you can do about the problems existing....

Don't waste anytime protecting yourself, and your children in this situation. You need to stay on top of it and get it right the first time out.

Make sure he doesn't get the opportunity to WALK OUT and leave you holding everything to pay..... he helped create it all I'm sure.....

Good Luck, keep us posted. If we can help anyway, emotional, suggestions, just moral support, let us know......

Here on the Forum - we are FAMILY........ we all have our other problems too, not just the bankruptcy issues.....

Hoping the best for you.....

[aa06a47]

I am sorry to here your going through this, and I agree with Minny.

Make sure that any disbursements from his 401k plan go directly to the children, and do not become part of your estate. Otherwise, the trustee may say...oh, that's mine. You bk attorney may need to help the divorce attorney on this one. 401k money is "safe" from the bk as long as it stays in the 401k. When it's taken out...bam, they get it!!!

[SinkingFast]

Here's a thread you should read with info for your particular situation. Same thing happened to this poster. Divorce during Ch 13:

http://www.bankruptcyforum.com/showthread.php?t=9530

From Anj's experience, if you really do Divorce, you have to notify the Trustee.

[lsutton1974]

I spoke with there office this morning and can't get into to see them until the 14th. In between my schedule and theirs that is the earliest. Hope all goes well.

[Minnymouth]

Keep us posted as to what your attorney says about the situation..... others may have this problem in the future and would like to know some about your situtation......

Hang in there, things will improve....... remember, the strong survive..... and where there is a "will - there is a way!!"

[Anj]

Hey - it's Anj - the bankrupcty (13) and divorce expert - NOT...

Really, the deal is you have to essentially inform the trustee that you are divorcing. When you divorce - you will file an amended I&J that will seperate the expenses that you both have and the repayment will follow that. Meaning - you may pay $200/mon and him $300 - if he has split and nothing is getting paid - you could dismiss and then refile alone and he would be accountable for his portion of the debts. The truck in both of your names - well, I don't know about that hun... I mean, if he took the truck and when the divorce is final, that's his vehicle, then that is his debt. If you have possession of the vehicle, give the darn thing back!

I feel for you - omg, do I feel for you - I hate this every day of my life and I hate feeling so caught up in the mess of all this. I hate feeling alone and that I don't have anyone to turn to... BUT - I always turn up here, looking thru posts and posting some of my own, and it helps...

Hang in there and ask anything. I am selling my home (hopefully quickly) and the sale will cover my debts 100% - so if God watches over me for about 90 days - I may, I just may make it thru all this....

(((((hugs))))))

[lsutton1974]

He has the truck, I have a van of course (4 kids and one on the way) . I know I am on it too but they can come and take it for all I care. Hopefully the attorney will be insightful and I can figure out what the heck I am supposed to do.

[Peevee]

well it would be good if you get a hardship discharge or convert to a chapter 7 and get it over with

[lsutton1974]

I filed for 7 in 2001 but what is a hardship discharge?

[Minnymouth]

If you filed for Chapter 7 in 2001 then the only option probably open to you is a Chapter 13..... UNLESS..... you can file for a Chapter 13 - hardship case..... ONLY an attorney can help you with that.......

Yes you need to sit down, have a long chat with an attorney that handles divorce and bankruptcy together...... anyone else will not do or help you....

[Anj]

my bankruptcy attorney is doing my divorce because it is uncontested... But I completely agree with Minny - talk to a lawyer that will represent you on both matters.

A

[Jman30]

I wish you the best! Bankruptcy is hard enough, without having to go through a divorce, especially with 4 kids and one on the way!!

I hope he has a good job to pay some serious child support.....

And I can't comprehend how any man can walk out on his pregnant wife.....let us know if you need anything!