Gonna vent a bit and share my story. Probably for no reason but to get it off my chest. And convince myself that I'm finally doing the right thing.
I always was in charge of the bills, and things started to slip. We had a couple of kids and things werent as easy as they always were. We always had ups and downs financially. I realize now that it was amazing I avoided bankruptcy before now. We were in good financial shape prior to buying our house 11 years ago. Got into some tax problems a few years after that and dealt with my wife getting layed off. She became self employed--that was up and down and let to initial tax debt. Got a 2nd mortgage (Big mistake #1) to pay off credit cars. We payed some off and slowly maxed them out. Took out a couple expense lines of credit to survive.
We had one real good year about 4 years ago when I was doing a side business and made good money--payed down some cards--but ended up with another big tax bill. And spent way too much money when I should have been paying more off.
My side business was seasonal, made money during holidays bled it during the year--struggled in the summer but caught up by the end of the year. I started with payday loans over 2 years ago and it was a nightmare. Had 6 loans locally, my Fridays were spent flipping them. I got out of most of them January 2010, but was back to relying on them early srping 2011. I was making good money through my normal job through commissions, but this just enabled me to survive with these loans. But eventually I took out more and didnt make as much money this past Christmas and the house of cards came tumbling. I had a ton of online loans as well. I stopped paying those by changing my bank account but that only provided temporary relief. No side business income, and slow at my regular job. So I started again with the online loans..and was falling (further) behind on the mortgage.
I always was able to get out of these jams but never solve the core problem. I hid the extent of the troubles from my wife. I knew something was gonna give soon. It did when she found out the extent of the mortgage problem. So, I came clean on everything. It really was a relief--the most difficult thing ever--but really having everything out there with her and our families (borrowed to get the mortgage caught up) was a relief after a very difficult 2 weeks. In my head I was just biding my time--I figured she would leave. But I underestimated her..and she isnt going anywhere and is being way more supportive than I deserve.
Met with the BK lawyer last week. We make too much for a 7. I knew that going in. I will be filing the 13 by myself and can include all my debt and joint debt. We arent underwater on our 1st mortgage so cant include the 2nd. Nearly everything else is just in my name, and since it will be a 100% plan, I can include our joint debts as well.
I estimate that my payment may be about $1200 a month. That includes 1 car--We recently paid off our other car--and we will have to replace that in the next 2 years in all likelihood. That sounded like alot at first..but its less than our core debt - car+ 2nd mortgage + 2 personal loans. Plus it will take care of the taxes, the PDLs and various other debts I incurred that I havent even thought of being able to pay off.
So, in 5 years we WILL come out of this stronger as a family - able to save for college educations, and with zero unsecured debt--and no more tax issues hanging over our head. We may even be able to have the 2nd paid off--as out attorney explained, we could put it in the bankruptcy--but at the same interest rate + fees we can pay it off cheaper on our own over 5 years.
Thanks for the forum to vent. If anyone is in the same boat that I am in..know that it's such a relief to get everything in the open, and to see a solution where you dont have to deal with everything that comes along with being in such a deep hole. For me, being in a chapter 13 will be so much less stressful than the crap I put myself and my family though for over 2 years. Im sure I'll have frustrations along the road--but I can see a point in time in the next couple of months where I will feel a sense of freedom--even though I'll just be starting my Chapter 13.
I always was in charge of the bills, and things started to slip. We had a couple of kids and things werent as easy as they always were. We always had ups and downs financially. I realize now that it was amazing I avoided bankruptcy before now. We were in good financial shape prior to buying our house 11 years ago. Got into some tax problems a few years after that and dealt with my wife getting layed off. She became self employed--that was up and down and let to initial tax debt. Got a 2nd mortgage (Big mistake #1) to pay off credit cars. We payed some off and slowly maxed them out. Took out a couple expense lines of credit to survive.
We had one real good year about 4 years ago when I was doing a side business and made good money--payed down some cards--but ended up with another big tax bill. And spent way too much money when I should have been paying more off.
My side business was seasonal, made money during holidays bled it during the year--struggled in the summer but caught up by the end of the year. I started with payday loans over 2 years ago and it was a nightmare. Had 6 loans locally, my Fridays were spent flipping them. I got out of most of them January 2010, but was back to relying on them early srping 2011. I was making good money through my normal job through commissions, but this just enabled me to survive with these loans. But eventually I took out more and didnt make as much money this past Christmas and the house of cards came tumbling. I had a ton of online loans as well. I stopped paying those by changing my bank account but that only provided temporary relief. No side business income, and slow at my regular job. So I started again with the online loans..and was falling (further) behind on the mortgage.
I always was able to get out of these jams but never solve the core problem. I hid the extent of the troubles from my wife. I knew something was gonna give soon. It did when she found out the extent of the mortgage problem. So, I came clean on everything. It really was a relief--the most difficult thing ever--but really having everything out there with her and our families (borrowed to get the mortgage caught up) was a relief after a very difficult 2 weeks. In my head I was just biding my time--I figured she would leave. But I underestimated her..and she isnt going anywhere and is being way more supportive than I deserve.
Met with the BK lawyer last week. We make too much for a 7. I knew that going in. I will be filing the 13 by myself and can include all my debt and joint debt. We arent underwater on our 1st mortgage so cant include the 2nd. Nearly everything else is just in my name, and since it will be a 100% plan, I can include our joint debts as well.
I estimate that my payment may be about $1200 a month. That includes 1 car--We recently paid off our other car--and we will have to replace that in the next 2 years in all likelihood. That sounded like alot at first..but its less than our core debt - car+ 2nd mortgage + 2 personal loans. Plus it will take care of the taxes, the PDLs and various other debts I incurred that I havent even thought of being able to pay off.
So, in 5 years we WILL come out of this stronger as a family - able to save for college educations, and with zero unsecured debt--and no more tax issues hanging over our head. We may even be able to have the 2nd paid off--as out attorney explained, we could put it in the bankruptcy--but at the same interest rate + fees we can pay it off cheaper on our own over 5 years.
Thanks for the forum to vent. If anyone is in the same boat that I am in..know that it's such a relief to get everything in the open, and to see a solution where you dont have to deal with everything that comes along with being in such a deep hole. For me, being in a chapter 13 will be so much less stressful than the crap I put myself and my family though for over 2 years. Im sure I'll have frustrations along the road--but I can see a point in time in the next couple of months where I will feel a sense of freedom--even though I'll just be starting my Chapter 13.
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