Maternity Leave?

[black44dog]

hey all.. first time I've posted a question here..

My wife and I are a year and a half into ch13. We have a 2 year old son and always wanted to have a 2nd child within 3 years of the older. So that would mean trying to have another around aug-sept-oct. Now both my wife and I have garneshments on our pays.. we both work.. and work hard. If my wife had to go on maternity leave, which would stop pay for 2 months on her side.. Are we totally screwed? Is there a way to put the garneshments on hold for 2 months? Or would the trustee get mad?

We really want to have another kid.. saving enough to pay those 2 months to the trustee while having enough to pay bills those 2 months without her income would be all but impossible.

[lrprn]

Talk this over with your lawyer. Some trustees will allow a reduction on or skipping some Ch 13 payments when the situation warrants it. Some won't. Your lawyer will know which side of the fence your trustee falls on. This way you'll know what to expect if you do decide to try to get pregnant before your Ch 13 is over.

[Pandora]

We really want to have another kid.. saving enough to pay those 2 months to the trustee while having enough to pay bills those 2 months without her income would be all but impossible.

This sentence says it all; while I understand the desire to have another child, the question you need to ask yourself and answer honestly is if you cannot save up enough to pay your 13 payment for 2 months - can you really afford another child at this moment? Kids are expensive as you well know, so you need to sit down and factor in the added costs of having another one (diapers, formula, insurance, meds, clothing, etc) not to mention time off of work for your wife while pregnant & kids when sick (Babysitter, daycare, missed work for illnesses, etc).

Other thing you need to look at is will you be allowed to lower your 13 payment to the trustee at all? What are you paying to secured / unsecured / priority debts? If you cannot lower it, then you will have to make it work for the remainder of your Ch. 13 plan, all while trying to include expenses for a new baby.

[AngelinaCatHub]

This sentence says it all; while I understand the desire to have another child, the question you need to ask yourself and answer honestly is if you cannot save up enough to pay your 13 payment for 2 months - can you really afford another child at this moment? Kids are expensive as you well know, so you need to sit down and factor in the added costs of having another one (diapers, formula, insurance, meds, clothing, etc) not to mention time off of work for your wife while pregnant & kids when sick (Babysitter, daycare, missed work for illnesses, etc).

Other thing you need to look at is will you be allowed to lower your 13 payment to the trustee at all? What are you paying to secured / unsecured / priority debts? If you cannot lower it, then you will have to make it work for the remainder of your Ch. 13 plan, all while trying to include expenses for a new baby.

I support Pandora's take 100%. You cannot afford another child while in bankruptcy or even after. A 13 has a large failure rate. Get your bk finished, get your life stable and see what extra you have after all expenses. BTW welcome to the forum. 'Hub

[99lawdog99]

How can you even think about having another child at this point in time. Get things stable first so you can afford another one. If not, there is nothing wrong with having one child. I just don't understand this line of thinking.

[black44dog]

The reason we want to have another kid is because we do not want our kids to be too far apart in age. 3 year difference is the max. if we don't have one now.. we wont have another later.

I spoke with the lawyer, he said that our income was too high to be in a chapter 7, and if we had a kid, its a good chance we would be moved into a chapter 7.

I don't expect people to think we are being smart.. if we were smart, this wouldn't of gotten to this point.. Our first kid will be out of diapers hopefully by the time he's 3 and 1/2. We have mostly everything needed for a 2nd child except for size 1 diapers and formula if my wife can't breastfeed.

If we were to wait for our ch13 to be over before we had another child.. my first kid will be almost 7.. an 8 year difference? No thank you...

[IamOld]

black44dog - I do not presume to speak for the collective wisdom here, so what I'm saying comes from me personally - I think you and your wife speak from the heart, and our fellow travelers on the hard path of life speak from the brain, so to speak - I too always said to my spouse -let's wait to have kids till we can afford it (mine are teens) - reply was we will never be able to "afford it" if we look at it that way...we'll never have "enough" money. So I know you look at this from the heart, and I truly wish this miserable world of ours did as well. And yes, perhaps from my own point of view, this is a very grim world...

But anyway - indeed, if the lawyer thinks that you CAN go into a Ch 7 with the new baby (and your new legit expenses) then the brain would say that may indeed be a help if you can get out of the 13 and into the 7.

Whatever path you and your wife decide to take, my best wishes to you!!!!

OH - one more thing - ask the lawyer - or even on the NOLO means test - to do a recalc - assume your new income say two months after kid with your wife being out of work for x months, add in new expenses, etc., and I think the math would NOW show you where you'd stand...I'd say this may be worth a few bucks for the lawyer to do AND!!! I would say you should do the same calc on NOLO as well - just to compare lawyer to NOLO.

The reason we want to have another kid is because we do not want our kids to be too far apart in age. 3 year difference is the max. if we don't have one now.. we wont have another later.

I spoke with the lawyer, he said that our income was too high to be in a chapter 7, and if we had a kid, its a good chance we would be moved into a chapter 7.

I don't expect people to think we are being smart.. if we were smart, this wouldn't of gotten to this point.. Our first kid will be out of diapers hopefully by the time he's 3 and 1/2. We have mostly everything needed for a 2nd child except for size 1 diapers and formula if my wife can't breastfeed.

If we were to wait for our ch13 to be over before we had another child.. my first kid will be almost 7.. an 8 year difference? No thank you...

[IamOld]

How can you even think about having another child at this point in time. Get things stable first so you can afford another one. If not, there is nothing wrong with having one child. I just don't understand this line of thinking.

:-) I am told only children have more problems in life - I may be a good example :-)

[debee]

I am told only children have more problems in life - I may be a good example :-)

LOL.

If having a child that you want to have anyway can get you moved from a 13 to a 7, I would do it. Just mho.

edit to add: median income for family of 3 in PA is roughly 67K, for a family of 4 it's roughly 80K.

[azdebtor]

Black44dog, don't let anyone scare you away from having another child. Raising children that you love and wish to see succeed in life is a wonderful thing for parents. I can't imagine that having a child (it happens all the time accidently) could possibly be discouraged in a BK - this isn't China. Let the Trustee figure out what to do if the situation arises. My wife and I would love to have more children but it hasn't happened. Just make sure that you make them better than you are.

[Flamingo]

Having a child is a personal decision that one should discuss with their own family and, in this situation, attorney, due to all the factors involved. Also, will your wife receive compensation for her maternity leave or any part thereof? Since you are in a Chapter 13, that would have to be taken into account also. Most companies require that the person going on maternity leave utilize all vacation and other available personal holidays for any time taken off before any other leave goes into effect. You also need to take into consideration that you will be at that time more than two years into your Chapter 13 depending on when and if your wife becomes pregnant. You could be half way through your plan or more before any child is born. You have a lot to think about...Best of luck to you...

[Pandora]

I dont think anyone on here said NOT to have another child to the OP; the OP asked our opinions based on their current Ch. 13 & financial situation, to which either opinions or scenario's were provided to provide the OP with a little more food for thought. I'll stand behind what I wrote because its the reality of it in all honesty. If one cannot save up 2 months of funds to pay all expenses then there is a high probability that the 13 will fail - thereby throwing away all that $ paid into it, not mention that one needs $ due to increases/unexpected emergencies/time off work/etc with kids. Also remember that a plan cannot be amended until that baby is born - there is no "credit" until then. In no way was I saying "oh..you cant afford another kid...so dont have one".

There's nothing wrong with being 7-8 years apart or an only child either Our kids are 7 years apart and they're fine! you all make it sound like having kids more than 2-3 years apart or having only 1 child makes them morph into something hideous ROFL! BTW - whoever said "if you wait until you're financially stable to have kids.. you'll never have them.." was 100% correct. I dont care if you are financially stable...kids take a copious amount of money to raise...and even when they're adults -they still call and ask for money

To the OP: Only you know whats best for your family and I believe thats what everyone who's replied to your post is saying, to just look at every angle possible beforehand so that you have plans in place for A, B, and C.

[nsupanda]

If your attorney thinks you can handle it, I would go for it. I hate to think a bankruptcy will control your life to that extreme. Kids are a blessing from God and a bankruptcy shouldn't get in the way of that. Anyway, what if it were an accident??? Would the Trustee order your wife to have an abortion??? No! They would have to change something in your bankruptcy to allow the new expenses of a new child. If they don't, then something is just messed up.

[IamOld]

That's a good thought - seriously - "Trustee orders couple to have abortion!" sounds like China to me...

[MOMof3]

I had two babies while in my chapter 13. Never modified my plan, so obviously we have a good plan that allows for us to save. During my maternity leave, I sent in payments to the trustee as money orders in lieu of the wage garnishment. This was not a problem for the trustee as long as we paid.

If having another child can "help" you get into a chapter 7, then it might be a thought. I thought about quitting my job, but at my age and income level, it would have been hard to get back into the workforce, so I opted to keep on chugging. Daycare expense has been a nightmare, but we will be done with our 13 soon enough.

Good Luck!!