Divorce question

[shadowb]

My husband surprised me by serving me with divorce papers. We were not even legally separated, no having problems that indicated we were heading in that direction! Anyway, we are in a chapter 13, which I can't afford now. Our trustee thought it was cool to do deduction from my paycheck for the most. I get a whopping $13 and some change every two weeks. I don't know how I can support my two children and myself on this. Also, I have evidence that shows that my husband was not being truthful about the status of our relationship when we were going through the chapter 13 and going to court on that. At any rate, is it possible that I get out of this. At this point I am going to have nothing to lose. I can't afford the house anyway, not on bringing home $26 a month. I don't think what child support I get would help the house note payment. So, it will probably go up for sale. My car note (which had a few months left) was rolled into the chapter 13. At this point the only thing I would hope to keep would be my car. I am hoping someone out there can give me some thoughts and advise me on whether or not I should go talk to a BK attorney to get out of this.

[relief13035]

You definately need to get with an attorney right away. Maybe your BK attorney can suggest a good divorce attorney.

[JRScott]

It sounds like you need a lawyer, this is probably to complex for us to handle.

Some states require a separation period prior to divorce others don't.

If you were the breadwinner, watch for him to try to get alimony and if he challenges for the children child support.

If he fraudulently represented your living arrangement during the Chapter 13 it can be a double edge sword. If you went along with it and signed the papers anyway then it could be considered fraud on both of your parts. It is very likely the trustee could reopen the case and reexamine it. However your going to need a lawyer.

(Incidentally if the payment to the Trustee is not made then the 13 will be dismissed....)

Good Luck.

[shadowb]

Thanks for the responses. He didn't fraudulently represent our living arrangement, but I thought our relationship was at a certain status, yet I have found out he was committing adultry during that time. I was definitely not the breadwinner, he was. The reason they went after my paycheck for the direct withdrawal was because of my employer. His employer doesn't allow for those deductions to come out, so the trustee allowed him to send in the difference.

I am still at a loss as far as a separation period. We were not even legally separated (shared the bed four days prior and him living in the house), when I recieved the papers. He as a matter of fact lied to me and the children and his parents, telling us he was heading out of town to work. The divorce papers arrived four days later and then we didn't hear a thing from him for a week. I know, all sounds weird.

I have an attorney and he wants me to retain someone local as co-counsel. Plus I am thinking I need to go see a BK attorney. A friend of mine thinks I may be able to get out of the Ch 13 due to hardship. Of course, he may decide to head that direction also...I just don't know. He left the home and we haven't really communicated at all about anything. It is a mystery as to what he could be deciding. My fear is if he gets out I don't want to be stuck holding this.

[danaf]

I wonder if you could convert to a 7 and be done with it if hardship doesn't work....

[wees]

That's a sad news. You should definitely need to talk to a BK attorney, he can figure something to help you. I hope everything will be OK. Good Luck to you!

[woeisme]

If your hubby is the major breadwinner, then post-divorce you should be able to convert to a CH 7 and leave him holding the bag for the debts unless his income is low enough to also convert to CH 7. Right now I would call your lawyer who filed your CH 13 and let them know the situation, so they can notify the trustee. You might be able to get the CH 13 payments deferred while waiting to sort things out, maybe not, but either way you can't live on a few dollars a month so the CH 13 has to be converted or dismissed. Have you talked to your husband at all since this happened? What a childish coward he is, to run away and hide. So sorry that you are going through this!

[Flamingo]

Whenever one has a divorce issue and BK together, it's always best to get full legal advice since so many things differ as to different states, situations, etc. Get yourself a good divorce lawyer and make sure the lawyer ensures your hubby pays the attorney fees. Protect yourself.

[filingin08]

As other posters have said, make sure you get an attorney familiar with family law and bk law!!

My husband and his ex have joint debt. It was split in their divorce decree. We are filing Ch13 on those debts. We will be discharged, she will not. At least that's what our atty told us - the ex has filed an adversary complaint (I would too if in her shoes).

From my limited research, best to get rid of all joint debts, sell the house, pay them off, file Ch7, something, anything to get rid of the joint debt. Separate yourself completely financially. Then divorce. Any payments to you should be labled as domestic support obligations and the intent that they are support should be very obvious (intent is just as important as the words to a BK judge). DSOs cannot be discharged if he ever files BK again.

We're on the other side of that fence and are arguing the property settlement was not intended as support. Creditors don't care who pays and will go after her if in fact we are discharged of that debt. With a Ch7, she could file in family court that he was in contempt of court and he would have to make her whole, but in a Ch13, the debt should be discharged. Which explains the adversary complaint...

As you well know, it's tough enough to go through bankruptcy, don't leave yourself open for trouble with a divorce decree that doesn't adequately protect you. Take care of yourself!

Good luck.

[shadowb]

Thanks

Thanks for all the advice. My attorney for the divorce has admitted she herself is unclear. I wasn't sure if I could go to our BK attorney since they represent both of us. My attorney thinks that with my husband being the BW and my hugely low income, I should be able to get out due to hardship and/or go chapter 7, though she isn't too sure how it all works. She is a complete PRO at family law though, so for that I am blessed. I was though thinking something has got to be done but didn't know if I need to get that ball rolling now or what. I did call the BK attorney who represented her and inquired about whether or not I needed to call the trustee, and she gave me this story of how the trustee wouldn't care and all she wanted was the payments, though I don't completely trust the attorney and suspect she might lose money if I have to bail/convert. Any thoughts would be great!

[woeisme]

actually your BK attorney will probably make more money if you convert, provided the CH 13 fees have already been paid. the trustee assessment is true, to a point. they care about getting paid up until the point they get paperwork describing the change in situation, then have to act on the new information. i'd really push for a conversion to CH 7, if your current attorney won't do it, file to have him/her removed from case due to conflict of interest with your soon to be ex-spouse, and get your own attorney.

[shadowb]

Thanks again for the advice. I did contact our original BK attorneys, but this time I spoke to the partner. He was very supportive and actually remembered that I had the hugely low income and on top of that I was the one carrying our medical benefits. He immediately said that he for sure knew I could get out on a Chapter 7 fresh start and my DH would be stuck with the BK13 debt. He said that since my DH made "too much" who would never be able to convert. At this point he said that they had not heard at all from my DH so were completely unaware of what was going on and he also said that they could handle my conversion to the 7 if needed. At this point I have not done anything yet. I plan on calling them probably again tomorrow. I do have one question to table on this forum....does anybody know how community property is handled. In other words, when we start selling the stuff, does it go straight to the trustee to be debt? Which debt does it pay, secured or unsecured? If I file 7 can I still get what is due me via the community property settlement? My divorce attorney is afraid going 7 before the divorce is final could do me more harm than good.

[AngelinaCat]

Dear shadowb:

Damn, I hate reading this. First off go to nolopress.com and purchase their downlodable Ch7 book. It is around $18.00 dollars and well worth the price. It will help answer a lot of your questions about your particular state and all that. They offer a 'freebie' as well. Take that too as that is a 'do it yourself' guide to simple legal matters.

If you feel like you might have $20 or so extra bucks (yeah, right! I know) check out nolopress's Divorce guides.

You have my prayers on your behalf.