Life in a Chapter 13

[laurannm]

I saw a similar post but it was quite some time ago, so I thought I would post it again.

What is the day-to-day life like for those of you in a Chapter 13, particularly those of you who have young children?
Are you finding it hard, less stress, little bit of both?
Are you finding it hard still to make ends meet or save a few bucks here and there?

Thanks!

[parsoc48]

Thanks for asking, I'm interested in this too. I am not looking forward to the next 5 years, but am trying to adjust my attitude!

[Sickofthe13]

I have 3 boys and let me tell you, it gets hairy. We have a crappy van that has issues all the time. This month we paid $600 to get it fixed (we got 4 tires too). We have had sump pump break downs, and like 4 furnace break downs. Other than that kind of stuff. we DONT have creditor calls bright and early and late late at night. We dont get the 20 envelopes of bill collector threats. Now we get credit card applications. So its good and bad. I say, after 3 years, seeing people in serious debt, keeping up with the Joneses...I am so over that.

[charmedmom]

I have two boys and it does get stressful at times but compared to my stress before this is sooooo much better. We had a great attorney and now I am not as worried when we have doctor, dentist etc. I don't really like being under the trustees thumb for 3 years but before we were under our CC's thumb( and both feet)

[flower04]

Thanks for this post. It is nice to now it is all worth it.

[lrprn]

Our two kids are now grown and out of the house, but were home through the early years when our finances were getting out of hand and my hubby and I would discuss our money problems quite loudly when we thought they couldn't hear us - but of course they did .

Both of them have told us that they've learned so much watching us handle our financial problems and seeing the consequences of living too optimistically thinking things would improve when they don't. They both now budget carefully and watch their single credit cards like hawks paying them off each month.

We've told them both how proud we are that they've learned from our mistakes and assure them they won't find themselves in the same place we did if they stick with the sound financial lessons they learned by watching us throughout their lifetimes.

Kids at any age pick up so much that we think they don't understand. Even when they are very young they know when we are stressed no matter how hard we try to hide it.

Obviously you can't sit down and talk serious finances with your five year old, but even at that age they can learn restraint and that just wanting something doesn't mean you have to get it immediately. They can also watch mom and dad (or mom or dad in a single-parent family) deal with a serious problem and overcome it. There are a lifetime of lessons for kids to learn if we show them what they can handle at their ages and ask them to help solve the problem as a family.

The key is handling the family financial problems together rather than allowing guilt and constant apologies for the loss of things we can't buy them now to be the dominating family emotions. Kids really don't care about things - they care about *us* as their parents and they want to be loved and valued. You don't need to buy kids things to make that possible.

[MajorMike]

I can't imagine having kids and being on this tight of a budget. This is why we love being in sales and having the opportunity to sell one more thing and we have extra money....plus we do ALOT on line for extra money. Just filling out surveys, doing mystery shopping, and focus groups is great for that extra we need.

[Flamingo]

Our youngest daughter spent her entire high school years with us in our Chapter 13 Plan. We did a lot of creative stuff so she could go on her school trips and not have to be left out of things due to lack of funds. At 16 she took on a job to pay her car insurance and for spending money. She is now in college and works part-time while attending. She knows the value of money and saves what she can. Children learn from you how to handle money. Now is a good time to teach them about how to save and what things cost. I used to take her with me to the grocery store and show her the differences in value of various products, how to shop with coupons and how to compare. You can start that with your children at a young age. What you will run into is your children maybe having friends who are given everything or have everything. That can be hard to handle when those kids get to go everywhere and have everything they want and yours can't. With love and patience you will get through that and your kids much better off in the long run than those other kids.

[tofargone]

basically it sucks, not that its worse than the creditor calls and the constant harrasment, but it does suck. I have finished 1 of 5 in my sentance and am putting my house on the market next week to pay it all off. Personally I think anyone that can make it though this is a saint. Basically my biggest problem is the cost of everything rises, but the payment stays the same. When I got into this gas was less, food was less, my kids cost less ( school ), Insurance was less, property taxes were less, health insurance was less. But my salary is the same and so is my payment, so what was once about a $200 per month cushion is now about a $50. One car repair, house repair, doctors or dentist visit and I miss paying something.

Hope fully my house sells quick so I can spend the summer stress free.

God Bless

[parsoc48]

I'm hoping for sainthood...will I get a statue or medal named after me?? ha ha
I'm dreading the process but trying to keep a positive attitude; it will be a long 5 years, I'm afraid.

[tofargone]

All I can suggest is get a good attorney, and pray for a laid back trustee. I have no doubt we could make it if we have to, but its not easy and not fun. I have an opportunity to get out of it so I am going for it.

Good luck.


P.S. how does the Saint of Financial Obligation sound?

[krielly]

Too far gone,
have you considered amending your plan to adjust for your increased expenses?

[imbroke2]

I have 3 kids and a good lawyer and trustee, I think. We haven't had to hand him every single extra penny like tax returns or the rebate. Our kids are still involved in extracurricular activities. It helps that we have a new house-only 3 1/2 years old. I do worry about car problems especially since I have to drive about 50 miles 1 way to work (way to save the environment, huh?). Gas is the worst, but we just buy cheaper groceries and go to the library instead of the bookstore-things like that save us money. On top of that my husband has been laid off for the 2nd time since we started the whole process-only a year ago. It's been OK. I do have a little savings; it's automatically taken out of my check and goes to our credit union, so I don't even have to budget that money to be physically taken out. My kids don't complain too much-they have food on the table, clothes on their backs, and a roof over their heads. You just have to be creative to do things with the kids and in order to put some money aside for the unexpected.

[tofargone]

I talked to my attorney about ammending the plan, but since it is mostly secured ( I wanted to save the house due to equity ) there really is nothing I can do. I already staved off one increase. My payback is 76% the trustee wanted to up it to 82% ( no real reason given, he just wanted to ) we fought that and he backed down. Now of course I am still in for about 32K, but 23K is secured and 5K is priority so to pay off the rest really isn't much.

[woeisme]

I am 100% happy that I decided to file CH 13, although must admit that I'm only 8 months into it. We are in a better financial situation now than we have been in the past 5 years. We have savings! We live within our budget and manage to add a little to our savings every month instead of digging deeper and deeper in debt each month with out credit cards. We managed to have a decent Christmas with no bills in January! I can't even imagine how good life will be at the end of the plan when we have no medical or credit card debt (will still owe on student loans and house) and have that $1100 a month we are currently sending to the trustee. Sure, we've weathered some stressful situations (right now have $60 in my bank account and $50 in my wallet to get me through until payday) but this is one of the closest to the bare bones of months we've had so far, due to my husband going without pay for the past 4 weeks while they are working on his disability paperwork. He should get a check for all but 2 weeks that he has been off work next week though, and I will be getting paid as well, so we've managed to get by without even tapping into the savings, just won't be adding to it any this month. (It helped a lot that he wasn't commuting to work, that's $300-400 worth of gas we didn't buy this month while he's off work for his back problems). So while we're not living the high life, we are managing without too much financial woes. Maybe I'll have to change my name, lol.