Separation

[skyoumans]

My marriage is having trouble...no surprise there considering I’m in bankruptcy. So, the attorney say that if I got an attorney they would have to file a motion with the court to redo schedule I and J.

i think that I would probably qualify for chapter 7 at that point, however our house is in the BK and has areas of around $10,000. I’m thinking we will have to sale the house, can you do that if it is in arrears? Could I still keep my car? Would they get my money from the sale of the house?

Another option would be to stick it out until the end and somehow deal with it. I’ve been doing it awhile already. no option is a good option. We have 2 children, 17 years and 13 years. I don’t even know if I can live on my own and afford it.

[sophieanne]

Hi..I’m sorry to hear about your situation..
I don’t live your life so this is only an opinion. How far in your plan are you? If you can live amicably would it be worth staying together to get through the plan and your family through this tough time? If it’s too hard might not be worth it. Is your housing market booming. If so, speak to your attorney about what could happen. Again I’m so sorry for the tough time,

[skyoumans]

Thank you, unfortunately it has only been 4 months in our plan.

[sophieanne]

Sorry again..how is your housing market?

[skyoumans]

I think it’s good, atleast it was before pandemic.

[shipo]

skyoumans, your story was more or less my story back in 2013; we ended up selling the house, at a significant loss, the first mortgage company took the arrears as part of the proceeds of the sale and left the second mortgage company out to hang. They then turned around and demanded we sign a promissory note for the remaining balance on that note. All this while our 19 year old son had yet to launch, our 16 year old daughter was doing the teenage hormone meltdown thing, and my wife was tossing me out because of our finances. Yeah, sounds a bit similar to yours.

First things first, bring your lawyer into the loop and explore your options, come up with plans for separation, no separation, keeping the house, not keeping the house, you name it, then follow the old adage, "plan the work, work the plan". Second thing; hang in there, I know the next 56 months seems like a long freakin' time, but it will pass. In our case, I wasn't able to file for Chapter 13 until 2015, a year and a half after we separated and sold the house; given we were already separated when I filed, that made things rather simpler from a filing and finances perspective, but it was still messy.

Fast forward to 2020, my wife and I never divorced and stayed in touch; my Chapter 13 was Discharged in March, right about the same time as she moved out of her condo and back in with me, and right in time for us to go on our first vacation together in over ten years, albeit a vacation which was prematurely cut short because of COVID-19.

Good luck and keep us posted on how you make out.

[skyoumans]

Thanks so much for your response and I’m so glad to hear your story worked out well! Our story still has a little hope but it’s topsy turvy and I need to plan for this since I don’t know how much more I can take. I’ve got lots of questions that I emailed my attorney

[Carmella]

I am sorry to hear about your situation BK is hard enough than to deal with marital issues as well. I think others have given you great advice and talking to the attorney will help you determine what route to take.

It also reminded me that our attorney asked me and my husband more than once if we were planning to separate or divorce. That leads me to believe this is not uncommon.

[skyoumans]

Thanks Carmella and yes in my research it is quite common.