Heard from an actor *Friend* from years past... come on, really? You need money now?

[Zombie13]

justbroke shipo Carmella , and others :: Hi folks, hope you are all doing well! What would you make of this?

This is not bk related, but really, we have learned from years of experience, to recognize a waste of time from whom we actually considered a friend. And person who I am refering to: if you're on this forum, the best advice I can offer is: dude, after 25+ years of trying exclusively to earn income as an actor, seriously, get a job, because by now, you are not going to 'make it' at age 55+. Get the health insurance. Or, file bankruptcy!

A couple days ago I posted on a social media page which I own, which I also have not posted to, in a few years. Then suddenly, I receive this long drawn out message, a boiler plate message from a 'friend' of years past: 20+ years. Then suddenly, "they need money!". Whatever. Anyway, below is the <edited to protect the innocent> message from the individual. Again, to this individual: Get. A. Job. Simple, okay? Also, yeah sure, love you back.

########!!! It has been forever man. Really hope you and ######## are well. I am sending this message out to a few trusted friends who know a bit about me and my character. I wish I could say everything was going amazing, and although I've had some successes, things have been tough the last couple of months. I'm working really hard to keep my dreams alive. I am even applying to some full-time jobs right now because things have gotten so crazy though. Hopefully I don't have to quit acting forever. Just wanted you both to read the message below and let me know your thoughts. If you can help, that's great but I don't expect a lot from any one person. Anything helps I don't care how small it is. Please remember that! A few friends of mine I sent my message to thought it was a scam, so now I'm individually giving each person information only they and I would know. So here is yours. You guys used to give me rides in ######## when I lived in ### ######### Apartments. ######## LOVED chicken ######## and ########. I think you worked with chips or a super Collider or something like that. There that should be enough so you know it's the real me. I really appreciate you guys, and even though it's been a long time when friends get together it's like time never passed. So Below is the message that I typed out already and was sending to some friends. Please don't feel weird. It's cool no matter what. I appreciate you no matter what. If you can help it all that would be so needed and so awesome. Big or small I don't care. Anything else. Here's a message I left below. You guys be well and continue to prosper. Love you guys. ########
########
######## ########
Here is my composed message:
########
######## ########
Hey. Hope that you are doing well. My apologies for this surprise text, but I am contacting friends who know of me and my character for something urgent. I've been doing okay for a while, but in the last few months I have been hit with a number of difficulties, some financial/job related, and some health issues. Ever since Covid hit us all, my acting work has been drying up a bit steadily over time, and no one wants to shoot projects like they used to do before Covid. Almost all of my auditions have been from home on a cell phone because so many video production companies went out of business or are still scared of contracting the virus even to this day.

Long story short I've been hanging in and doing the best I can but need some help to get through the next month so that I can find a full-time job to allow me to live and take care of myself properly. I have to put my acting dreams on the back burner to do this and I hope I don't have to give it up completely. Just wanted to ask you this one time only, but wondering if you might have $50 to $150+ so I can keep my phone on (which is crucial for jobs and gigs), get a pack of contact lenses ( I only have one spare left and they could tear at any minute, and I HAVE to be able to see), and if possible put a little food on the table to help me make It through until I can get some paychecks coming in the next month or two. Obviously when you add up my needs above it is greater than $50 to $100, but I just didn't want to freak anyone out. Just asking for help with what you can even if it's smaller or greater than those amounts. Anything helps.

I know this economy is crazy for a lot of people, but if you are able and blessed to send me anything at this time, I would be eternally grateful. ANY amount below OR above what I stated is greatly appreciated and needed during this difficult and transitional time for me. I have zelle and cash app and venmo and paypal. Just let me know which one is easier for you to use. Thanks so much for whatever you can do to help me, and God bless. Leaving my number also so you know it's the real me. ###-###-####.

Hope you get laugh outta this. It was pretty weird for us.

[shipo]

Ugh, that's a little too close to home for me, my wife and I have a family member who proceeds to move from one financial crisis to the next, and yikes, don't anyone dare make any suggestions about how this individual might get some relief.

[justbroke]

I think that's well handled. I have a close family friend that is always in dire straits; they almost lost their home twice to foreclosure. Two of them have severe gambling problems and I had to just stop talking to them or taking their calls. They are in a perpetual crisis that only a cessation of gambling will fix. They don't listen to me but always want to loan from the Bank of Justbroke. Loans are never repaid. I'm done!

Oh, and Zombie13, my number is 867-5309... so you know it's the real me.

[Zombie13]

justbroke LOL <for real!> You made me laugh, and smile! Yep... that's a song ... Jenny! Now I gotta hear it.
shipo- thank you as well! Due to the timing, I questioned the validity of the social media message, and the 'connect request': I make a post in a 'stale' page; couple days later I get what I perceive to be an outdated message/request (note the Covid reference - filmmakers aren't afraid to film anymore). Just looked like social media was triggered to finally release an outdated message; or, a well-trained aaaaAaeeee eyIee app. Just weird.
In any event, yeah, we were done with this individual at least 12 years ago. Then out of the blue, after 12 - 20 years of zero contact, oh I need money? Just weird. Don't they have other friends now? Are they even alive now? Their social media details show minimal acting credits, though up to 2023.
Long story short, my gut tells me about this: something just isn't right; though it appears legit based on how well we know this individual. Why would they contact us, only after 12 years of zero contact? If they truly did, that's a truly shiddy thing to do. Don't bother caring about how we are doing, what we have been through; just ask us for money because they are too boneheaded and self centered to stay in touch over the years. Yeah sure, we'll double down to give this not-a-true-friend money. Wow. In a word: Offensive! LOL!

[justbroke]

They contact you after so many years because they've reached such a low point that they hope you forgot the history. Oh, and Zombie13, don't lose my number.

[Zombie13]

justbroke - that makes sense but .... we didn't forget. Barbisi will pontificate on our history very soon.
Also, I want to say, thank you, for being able to post here, versus responding to this individual directly.
ANd justbroke - I got your number.

[Carmella]

I am such a skeptic. I feel like this message would be a scam I wouldn't even believe it, unless doing more research.

I would be like it's a fake profile that looked up available information online and wrote a nice creative story. Phone numbers can be on Facebook profiles if the person doesn't know how to make it private. Or it might be available to "friends" and we might have friends we don't know in real life. At least I do, even though I cautiously friended them through private/fairly closed groups in the past.

Seriously, a real person in that situation is a mess coming out of the woodwork.

About 867-5309

We are going to a concert: Totally Tubular! And guess who's on stage Tommy Tutone! There's about 5 performers/groups from the 80's performing. The big draw for me was Thomas Dolby as I saw him when I was 18 in a small club and he was awesome! The first time I saw an artist crowd surf.

And since BK is the past it was easy enough to buy tickets, didn't get the "best" seats, but we are in the Pavilion. I just can't spend the top dollar for concerts because it's ridiculous prices (I am definitely showing my age there) when I remember what we paid back in the day. But I did shell out $60 for preferred parking! This is an outdoor venue with a lot of gravel parking lots and it's always been confusing to exit venue or to find your car even when you were 20 something or younger. So I paid for the paved lot close to the entrance. $60 is a lot of me to think of for parking. But I know when we have had big sporting events I have seen prices even higher near the venues. I didn't go to these games, but my daughter was in college near the venues and I had to drive her and pick her up, commuter school, because even the frickin university sold out parking to "fans" instead of to the students who were required to go to class despite the craziness.

[justbroke]

Carmella, the scam angle makes sense as well. I haven't been to many concerts. Nearly all of the concerts that I did attend were backstage. I miss the 1980s. A much simpler time. Not as many distractions as there are today.

Zombie13, don't make me *69 you!

[Zombie13]

Carmella - thanks! Yes we considered the scam angle as well, though this person did provide details that the three of us knew, that we don't share on social media, in order to prove it was them, and not a scam. They also sent a connect request (I removed them some years ago) at the same time they sent the message.

Sounds like the concert will be a blast!! Feels good huh, to be able to actually do it, versus wish you could do it? Have fun!

ANd justbroke - love it! We are nerding out on 80s/90s stuff!!

[Barbisi]

Well, justbroke , Carmella , shipo , etc I finally feel ready to offer a summing up and provide some humorous tidbits about our not so bright would-be social media shyster before hopefully permanently laying the topic to an eternal rest.
We met this not so smooth operator soon after we began networking, auditioning and showing up on indie film sets in the once vibrant DFW acting/VO community.
He was always mooching rides, free food and free movie tickets off us, and at first, we were all to glad to help out a hapless but friendly fellow without a car, much money and even fewer prospects since he couldn't afford to take any classes. But, after a while, we noticed nothing we did was ever appreciated or reciprocated.
His biggest claim to fame (if you could call it that!) was his string of "featured extra" bits on "Walker Texas Ranger" (a big hit series at the time.) I also managed to appear as an extra in a couple of episodes in what was considered a natural progression for any aspiring actor in that market, but I never even mentioned it to others. It simply wasn't that huge a deal.
However, whenever he knew one of his episodes was slated to air, he was certain to call to remind us to be sure and "watch" him in his blink of an eye time on camera or you'd miss it.
Finally, he got the most swollen head, and decided he was a stunt man without the training and credentials. So, he ended up with a serious leg wound on a nonpaying independent film and sued for workman's comp (of course, he never had health insurance, either!) The minute that "WTR" heard about the lawsuit that was the last of his "roles" on that show. Oh, and he lost the medical lawsuit, too!
Another of his hairbrained schemes for success was impersonating a world-famous athlete of the era at a sports arena and listing the prank as an acting credit on his resume with the club manager listed as the "film director". Once he tried to talk Zombie13 in driving to a film audition site in the pouring rain to tape his headshot to the door because he couldn't make it himself.
We were already distancing ourselves in Texas from this user-loser who somehow fancied himself an "awesome actor in great shape" for whom stardom was simply "meant to be" before we moved to NH in 2004.

[justbroke]

It seams to me that each community of professionals we have that one person. Sometimes two people. Hopefully they get the hint this time.

[despritfreya]

It seams to me that each community of professionals we have that one person. Sometimes two people.

JB, you are so spot on correct. Anecdotally, years ago I had a client who claimed he was a world class long distance runner - even medaling in the 1980 Olympics (we boycotted that year - how convenient for him). What he didn’t know was that I knew the names of nearly every world class runner from my early childhood through the mid 1990s (and had personal acquaintances with many of them). His name was not one of them. What he didn’t know was that my dad’s best friend (since they were kids) was one of the leading authorities in the world regarding track & field (in addition to his duties in the US, he was an official for the USA at every Olympics from 1956 through 2000 and the Goodwill Games in 1980). So, not believing this guy, I called Howard. Nope - this guy was not a world class runner of any kind. Nope - he did not compete at the 1980 Olympics. He must of at least known who Howard was because, if I recall correctly, when I mentioned him, he kind of got quiet.

Des.

[BxRcvor]

So many different thoughts over this situation. In a way, I guess I'm a bit lucky in that I'm still recovering from my financial issues, and it's going a bit slower than I'd like. Therefore, I'd be just as broke as anyone else that might ask me for money! But, assuming I do fully recover from my financial situation at some point and have some disposable wealth, I'm starting to adopt the "Shakespeare/Hamlet" philosophy.... "Neither a borrower or a lender be..." And definitely not lend/borrow to/from family members. Because they think that gives them license to get into your financial business and control what you do and how you spend your money. My Aunt and Mom have given me small amounts during my recovery, without any expectation of payback. But I intend to pay them back when I can. I want that slate to be clear.

2nd Thought about the OP's original situation: I couldn't tell whether or not they could verify that the email/text actually came from a long time friend, or if it was a SCAM from the beginning. Did they identify themself in the communication (I do realize what you showed us was "redacted")? I'd be very skeptical of such a communication. I get solicitations like this all the time in email. And I can tell, usually, that they are fake/scams because they use an email address that I'd never use in the context of receiving that email. I'm a bit fortunate in that I have my own domain names, etc. and can create a bunch of different email addresses for specific purposes. And I can delete them at will, in the event I have to. That has worked well.

3rd Thought - I wonder whether or not the originators of that message to the OP had been stalking them to determine just how much money the OP has. I mean, if I'm going to "hit up" someone for money, I'm going to ensure that the target actually has money or property. Consider all of the "Mega Lotto" winners that get hit up all the time... get lawsuits filed against them just to see what people can get from the winner, etc. etc. etc. What good would it do to target someone for money that doesn't have any? If I were ever to hit the lottery, First thing is to vow not to change my lifestyle, as much as possible. And the 2nd is to not spend a dime... protect the wealth and use trust accounts to keep it protected. And then, vigorously, fight any lawsuit attempts and counter charge them where I can. Yes, I can be charitable, but I'm the one who should manage that charity and select my beneficiaries carefully. More than likely, I'd be likely to pick beneficiaries that don't directly solicit me, but that I find on my own. But I'm nowhere near that point. I'm still recovering.

So, to the OP, just make sure it isn't a SCAM. And, once determined, make your own choice as to whether or not you can help them, given your own situation.

I've lost contact with "Jenny," but you could also try PA6-5000 as well!

[Zombie13]

BxRcvor - howdy! And thank you for replying, much appreciated.
Yes, we are sure the person contacting us was authentic, based on details they disclosed, that they knew, about us, based on personal conversation (before cell phones were so 'smart'). They identified 3 or 4 things about Barbisi and I, which the three of us discussed back in the day.
We helped as much as we could back then, but had to draw the line.
Our friend already knew that I was gainfully employed 99% of the time we knew them. Recently I posted on a social media page I own, which I have not used in awhile. I suspect our friend was subscribed to that page, and decided, oh... I forgot about Zombie13 and Barbisi... I'll hit them up for money! In my solid opinion though: dude... seriously... after 20 years... Get... A... Job. Additionally - if they are an actor, and determined to remain so... go to LA, NY, Atlanta, Vancouver, etc. Dallas is not what it was 30+ years ago so.... wake up... but, oh that's right... they never had a survival job... to save... to move... to be successful.. oh yeah ok... whatever.